Gaijin Smash

Top 5 Most Hated Japanese TV, Part III

Posted in Blog by gaijinsmashnet on June 18, 2009

Before we get to the #1 spot, there’s one more show that deserves mention.
Dishonorable Mention: Waratte Ii Tomo!
The title of the show translates to “Its Okay To Laugh!”. Which is a pretty bold statement, considering they don’t give you much to laugh at. Its almost like a dentist who specializes in root canals hanging a sign up over the dentists chair that reads “It’s Okay to Orgasm!”
This show doesn’t make the main list primarily because its daytime TV…and I think it’s a rule of the cosmos that daytime TV must suck. Like, if Moses had stayed up on the mountain just wee bit longer, God would have carved “Thou Shalt Not Enjoy Daytime TV” as the 11th Commandment into the stone tablet. So I can’t hate on it for sucking, because sucking is a part of its destiny. This show did teach me something rather eye-opening about Japanese TV in general though, which is why it gets the mention at least.
The show features Tamori as a host (he joins Sanma as one of the “Big 3”). Tamori conducts a dull interview with some random celebrity, and the rest of the show is devoted to celebrities playing games, often with food involved. …But wait, this sounds almost exactly like every other show you’ve described so far, you may say. And you would be absolutely right. So, think about that for a moment – Japanese daytime and primetime TV are virtually identical.
The other thing I noticed while being subjected to this show is that the studio audience is 100% female. That got me thinking, and I realized that most shows had a predominately female audience. It makes sense, because Japanese guys are rarely ever home in the evenings. They work late hours, and even if/when they don’t, there are drinking parties, trips to the local whorehouse, or hours to waste away at the pachinko parlor. And that’s when everything clicked – Japanese TV is primarily meant for Japanese women. So its like a combination of daytime TV and the Lifetime Channel, on every channel, 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.
So, for us guys, this is more or less the first step into Hell itself.


This is especially problematic for Japan, because Japanese women are exceptionally boring. This is a blanket statement, and of course there will be exceptions (like Ms. Americanized, for example), but any male who has ever dated enough Japanese girls can testify to just how infuriatingly dull they are. Trying to make conversation with one can be just as fun as trying to pull the wisdom teeth from a rabid sabretooth tiger, bare-handed.
What are your hobbies? a potential suitor may ask. Japanese girl replies – “I like to go shopping, and sleep.” Goddamnit, sleeping is NOT a hobby. Going home and losing consciousness for several hours does not count as a hobby! …The shopping I will refrain from commenting on. While I don’t think it’s a hobby, I’ll also admit that I don’t understand it, so I can’t say much about it. Might as well be witchcraft.
So when you consider that this is the audience that Japanese TV is trying to entertain…yeah. Apparently, they can do nothing better than go to sleep when they are not working (if they work…), so its no wonder they can be easily amused by whatever nonsense is on TV. I’m thinking of making a new Japanese TV show where I spin a nickel on a tabletop for 25 minutes. I’m expecting decent ratings, and perhaps if I can get Sanma to help me spin my nickel as we eat and he laughs uncontrollably as I read from the Declaration of Independence, then the show should be a 10-year hit.
So, having had this revelation about Japanese TV, that brings us to my #1 most hated show…
#1: Gout Temps Nouveau
In this show, three women meet up at a café or a restaurant, and eat, drink, and talk. …And, that’s it. No, really. There are no crazy situations or insane stunts, no plot or storyline, and there isn’t even the slightest bit of lesbian wrestling covered in baby oil (I would watch that…). This TV show amounts to nothing more than watching three women have a conversation, and perhaps eat or drink while doing so.
This is one of my wife’s favorite TV shows.
Recently, my wife met up with two of her friends; S-san, and R-san, who had a baby last year. They got together at a café and ate/drank while talking. The wifey was telling me about this, and I just had to point something out…
Me: So the three of you hung out at a café and talked about life and romance and whatever shit women talk about?
Wife: Yeah, it was fun!
Me: Doesn’t that sound a lot like that Gout Temps show you watch?
Wife: Well…when you put it that way…yes, it does.
Me: So then…if you can do this with your friends in real life…what’s the point of watching it on TV?
Wife: But, the people on TV are celebrities!
Me: And, what do these celebrities talk about?
Wife: Well…life and romance and what not.
Me: And what do you and your friends talk about?
Wife: Well…life and romance and what not.
Me: *raises an eyebrow towards her*
Wife: But…they’re celebrities!
Me: …Sigh.
It should be noted that “Gout Temps Nouveau” is a renewal of “Gout Temps”. What changed? I have no idea. I also don’t know how long Gout Temps has been around, but I know it was airing when I first came to Japan, so that puts it at 6 years at least.
So keep this in mind – if you just happen to be free some day and want to randomly ask a Japanese friend of yours out for some conversation and food or drinks, without making a proper appointment well in advance to do so, you will probably be turned down. Your Japanese friend (especially if female) will then watch a TV show where people have conversations, food and drinks.
…Yep.
So that’s my list. There were a lot of crappy shows I couldn’t include because I don’t want to write that much about bad Japanese TV. These are just my personal top 5 offenders. It amazes me that the television here can be so awful; it’s a level of crap that I never imagined possible. But on the other hand, thanks to Japanese TV, I’ve rediscovered how awesome video games are (television has to be used for something) so I guess its not a complete loss. My only problem now is finding a way to get my wife off these shows before I’m driven completely insane.
If you all have any suggestions, I’d love to hear them.

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174 Responses

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  1. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:02 am

    It’s these sort of posts that make me fear a future with an asian woman

  2. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:02 am

    It’s these sort of posts that make me fear a future with an asian woman

  3. David said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:17 am

    How good is her English? If it’s decent, you could try show her how good American TV is (by comparison, by comparison)

  4. First said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:23 am

    First.

  5. Laafje said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:46 am

    And I thought MTV was bad.. Well it is, but I guess not as bad as Japanese TV, then.
    My solution would be hiding the remote control, except the time I tried that, it turned out the TV had some buttons on the backside to switch it on.. which meant I still had to hear horrible reality shows, at double the volume because there weren’t any buttons for that.
    So I guess it’s not much of a solution, then.

  6. bt said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:54 am

    BTW, what does the title mean? Temp workers at a podiatrist’s office? Nah… maybe a bad translation of “Good Times” (not getting hassled, not getting hustled)
    In my time in Japan, I would often go to the gym in the evening. The TVs set up there would always be showing Sanma and the “oh my gosh, is there a ghost in that picture?” show. I remember how dumb I thought they were, and this was out of the corner of my eye, without sound, while jogging or whatever. I can only imagine the pain of sitting down and directly watching these programs.

  7. Kosetsu said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:56 am

    Kantan da.
    Just introduce her to classic American television. Start with Heroes, due to its focus on the Japanese cast at several points, and move on to bigger and badder shows… Compared to Japanese television, it’d be like getting a shot of adrenaline and cocaine in the same needle.
    If that’s too big of a jump, maybe you could show her some American daytime television. Or better yet, American primetime talkshows. Whose Line Is It Anyways? and Colbert Report come highly recommended…

  8. Drake said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:58 am

    Tell her Japanese TV makes her look fat. And then sleep on a bench outside for a while.

  9. Shiki said, on June 18, 2009 at 2:11 am

    Teach her to play games with you, then get her into the Jenna Jameson “games” as a source of ideas for nighttime fun. =p

  10. Rob said, on June 18, 2009 at 2:16 am

    The purpose of television is to create a particular atmosphere in the room… well, at least for me. I like some of these shows because: (1) – they make me laugh from time to time, (2) – they’re lighthearted, and (3) – I can break out my laptop and easily get work done while the television is on.

  11. Ivan the Terrible said, on June 18, 2009 at 2:29 am

    Taiwanese television is also awful, and apparently in almost exactly the same way Japanese television is awful. Variety shows with ‘wacky’ sound effects randomly inserted into the action are the mainstay, and thus I’ve been forced to avoid television like the plague for both my continued sanity and my lingering faith in the essential goodness of humanity.
    On the other hand, I went back to the United States for a couple of weeks a few months back and quickly rediscovered how soul-crushingly awful so much American television is, as well.
    Perhaps the essential message behind all this is that we should stop rendering ourselves progressively stupider (stupider? more stupid?) by watching crappy entertainment and instead start spending more time reading 19th century existentialist Russian literature.
    Or just playing more video games. Whichever.

  12. Max said, on June 18, 2009 at 2:44 am

    Duh! Move back to the States!

  13. feitclub said, on June 18, 2009 at 2:56 am

    Well, I now fear that my wife will discover this “nouveau” show and I will be forced to do something violent to stop her from watching it. Could you tell me when it airs so I may, as a precaution, turn off the power in our apartment to prevent her from tuning to it by accident? Thanks in advance!
    (Az’s Note: Wednesdays at 11PM)

  14. Xas said, on June 18, 2009 at 3:12 am

    “My only problem now is finding a way to get my wife off these shows before”
    So you have to find a celebrity and go to a café…
    “It’s like on the TV !!!”
    Or buy her a Nintendo DS….

  15. Ook said, on June 18, 2009 at 3:37 am

    1. Get her something else than ‘celebrities’ to gossip about with her friends or co-workers…
    2. Return the good old female headache argument against her when you REALLY can’t take it anymore.

  16. JoeBlow said, on June 18, 2009 at 3:45 am

    Az, every time one of these shows comes on tell her it’s “baby-mak’n” time.
    That way she stops watching and you get laid. Double win.

  17. Andi said, on June 18, 2009 at 5:17 am

    What’s going on here? It seems like a world-wide conspiracy of all major TV-companies.
    Here in Germany the TV-Shows are not any better. In fact they consist to equal parts of
    a) watching people emigrate
    b) watching people re-migrate (emigrated people coming back)
    c) cooking shows
    d) casting shows
    My wife likes them, because they make her “come down”. I would like her to come instead.

  18. Salagir said, on June 18, 2009 at 5:31 am

    What the hell does “Gout Temps Nouveau” means ?
    I’m french and I know these three words, but together they don’t make any sense.
    In literal English it means “Taste time (new)” which means something (less with the “new” though).
    Except of course, “Taste time” in French would be “L’heure du goût”
    I totally understand most errors even on locals shop (some friend got back from japan and told me about the weirdest “french” names for bakeries) but here… 🙂
    But such a big error on primetime TV…
    Even “Baguette Bardot” clip by Toast Girl (a huge laugh, I love it!) is almost error-free.
    (I’ll said it again, no need for a typekey link if your site isn’t registered in it ^^)

  19. Alex said, on June 18, 2009 at 5:35 am

    It’s not just Japanese TV…..Taiwan and South Korea also have terrible TV….basically every democracy in East Asia watches the same type of absolute crap. Just be glad the world is so connected that you can still access the goodness of American TV everywhere (okay, the goodness of American genre shows….none of that reality bullshit).
    Why not get your wife watching sex and the city….that’s basically the same stuff she watches now, but with American celebrities and some nudity for you to enjoy while you don’t pay attention. Then you slowly start moving her towards lesser evils like Friends and then finally you get her off of all that and make her watch good shows like Burn Notice and House (I don’t know how well Japan would take to a doctor who knows everything though….if he doesn’t specialize then he’s not a real doctor according to their backwards logic).
    Oh Az…could you explain a way for Asians (non-Japanese or otherwise) who grew up in America, like me, to perform a proper Gaijin Smash >.>;; Everytime, I go to Japan I get treated like I’m one of them….then they realize I’m a foreigner and I get sneered at as if I’ve done some terrible wrong to them (that wrong being that I speak English….).

  20. jackie said, on June 18, 2009 at 6:24 am

    Record some of the shows from days ago and replay them when she wants to watch them. That way you can just tell her they must be airing all reruns that day and you get your game time.

  21. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 6:40 am

    @Laafje:
    Gout Temps Nouveau is a bastardization of French
    if I were to translate it word for word it would mean:
    Taste Time New
    Judging by the type of show it is, it seems a lot like the View.
    I pity you Az, I really do

  22. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 6:40 am

    @Laafje:
    Gout Temps Nouveau is a bastardization of French
    if I were to translate it word for word it would mean:
    Taste Time New
    Judging by the type of show it is, it seems a lot like the View.
    I pity you Az, I really do

  23. kristine said, on June 18, 2009 at 6:59 am

    “Gout Temps” is french for Taste Trends or something like that. “Nouveau” means New.
    So that’s probably why all they do is eat, haha.
    Anyways.. I’m pretty sure one or two of my friends watches the one where celebrities talk and eat with samna rofl-ing. And she enjoys it very much. I tried watching it once, and I was only interested because one of my favourite japanese celebrities was on.

  24. zs said, on June 18, 2009 at 7:07 am

    Quite a few years back[maybe about 10? I stopped hearing about the show around 5~ years ago] there was a dubbed japanese show that was shown on local television, and it was pretty entertaining for a change.
    I can only recall its chinese name[it was called 超极変変変] and it was a pretty random show where people came on stage, had around 1 minute or less to put up an entertaining show. They would then be ranked upon a scale of 20, based on 4 or 5 judges, who would then say something to them after their score was awarded.
    Here`s a clip that was pretty popular around here.

    Have you seen this show in Japan before? Is it an anomaly in Japanese TV or am I just whacked up for liking some Japanese TV?

  25. Ms Avery said, on June 18, 2009 at 7:53 am

    “Gout Temps Nouveau”?
    That is such a horrible mangling of the French language that it makes me want to cry. I don’t even particularly like French.

  26. Maxi said, on June 18, 2009 at 7:58 am

    @bt: “Gout Temps Nouveau” is French. Gout= taste; temps (has a lot of meanings)= day/time/times; nouveau= new.
    So it was probably intended to translate as something like “(New) Tasting Time”. Still a stupid name.
    Nice to know it isn’t just us English speakers who think that words in another language somehow add sophistication or cool points…

  27. Brandon said, on June 18, 2009 at 8:08 am

    Az,
    Another great post! I especially love your usage of Star Trek face palm’s.

  28. Joe said, on June 18, 2009 at 8:24 am

    OK, but the cure is worse than the disease:
    Get her pregnant!
    As children are in your future, how about Sesame Street, Electric Company, etc in Japanese? Do they have anything that counts as “educational”?
    Do you get Korean or Chinese TV?

  29. Thomas said, on June 18, 2009 at 10:28 am

    http://www.tv-asahi.co.jp/qsama/
    That is the only show that I miss from Japanese television. Mostly because it gave me a chance to learn more Japanese/test out my own Japanese knowledge. Also, as far as I remember this show doesn’t have one of damn mascots. Or at least not an extremely obtrusive one. (I remember one quiz show that I couldn’t stand because they had a mascot that they rendered in 3D and was voiced by somebody who wanted to make me tear my ears out. Not to mention, everyone talked to it like it actually existed. It was painful.) I suggest giving it a try, that is if your wife isn’t already watching something at that time.

  30. KC Masterpiece said, on June 18, 2009 at 10:55 am

    I don’t know what it is, but do the Japanese feel that all celebrities must be liked? I am pretty sure these shows could be entertaining if you enjoy 1 or 2 of the celebrities that are on them, but usually I don’t think you would.
    Great, celebrity 1 had her 1 year anniversary and celebrity 2 just broke up with her boyfriend. The problem is we don’t care about celebrity 1 or 2. So why would we want to hear them talk.

  31. Finn said, on June 18, 2009 at 10:58 am

    Get her to watch Firefly.

  32. cutepiku said, on June 18, 2009 at 11:03 am

    Import some DVD’s of some good North American shows.
    Or, if you can find the translated ones, that might work. Subtitles in Japanese for her might be good.

  33. yalie5 said, on June 18, 2009 at 12:02 pm

    rofl, waratte iitomo. i recognize the host from music station but until now I’ve always assumed that he was blind. XDD

  34. Beto said, on June 18, 2009 at 12:42 pm

    I thought the gout was a disease that affected the joints of your body and was from eating too much organ meat. I guess watching this show is about as much fun as suffering from the disease.

  35. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:04 pm

    It’s french. My french is admittedly rusty, but I believe it’s “Taste Time New.” But what I want to know is why the hell does a japanese show have a french title?

  36. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:04 pm

    It’s french. My french is admittedly rusty, but I believe it’s “Taste Time New.” But what I want to know is why the hell does a japanese show have a french title?

  37. LordMarlin said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:06 pm

    “Me: And what do you and your friends talk about?
    Wife: Well…life and romance and what not.
    Me: *raises an eyebrow towards her*
    Wife: But…they’re celebrities!”
    And your response to your wife should be, ‘but you (and your friends) are more exciting than celebrities aren’t they?’
    I say try to convince your wife that she’s more interesting than the celebrities she watches.

  38. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:15 pm

    Make her get a real hobby that is more interesting than watching TV. Some art or craft perhaps. Maybe a sport. Then she’ll be more apt to watch TV pertaining to a real interest than the shallow affectations of meaningless celebrities.
    Ideally, one can find a woman of such a vein prior to the long term relationship, but they seem to be difficult to find. Already taken? Busy with their hobby instead of meeting guys? It is a mystery.

  39. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:15 pm

    Make her get a real hobby that is more interesting than watching TV. Some art or craft perhaps. Maybe a sport. Then she’ll be more apt to watch TV pertaining to a real interest than the shallow affectations of meaningless celebrities.
    Ideally, one can find a woman of such a vein prior to the long term relationship, but they seem to be difficult to find. Already taken? Busy with their hobby instead of meeting guys? It is a mystery.

  40. Jared Foust said, on June 18, 2009 at 1:34 pm

    At least every once in a while you might catch a giant monster being violently destroyed by the hands of an equally giant superhero. On the weekends. Maybe.
    But hell, as much as I love that genre, I’ve tried watching some real Japanese TV before (both at home and in Japan) and it was not pleasant. At all. I have a hard time complaining about American reality TV when confronted with stuff like that. D:
    I’ll stick to letting other people sift the shows I like out of the crap for me and downloading them at my convenience, yes.

  41. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 2:42 pm

    I used to really enjoy reading your blog, I thought it was an interesting look at a culture I know very little about. Having read these ridiculous and hypocritical posts about how stupid japanese people are for watching moronic TV I don’t think I’ll bother coming back onto this site.
    All this bashing is coming from a grown man who plays video games and watches cartoons, call it manga or anime or whatever you want, it’s still cartoons. That to me means that you are no judge of any media that people enjoy.
    And by the way there is an equivalent of Gout Temps in practically every developed country in the world.
    And saying why would you watch something on tv when you could just do it yourself? Why not ask the millions of sports fans all over the world who do or do not play sports?

  42. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 2:42 pm

    I used to really enjoy reading your blog, I thought it was an interesting look at a culture I know very little about. Having read these ridiculous and hypocritical posts about how stupid japanese people are for watching moronic TV I don’t think I’ll bother coming back onto this site.
    All this bashing is coming from a grown man who plays video games and watches cartoons, call it manga or anime or whatever you want, it’s still cartoons. That to me means that you are no judge of any media that people enjoy.
    And by the way there is an equivalent of Gout Temps in practically every developed country in the world.
    And saying why would you watch something on tv when you could just do it yourself? Why not ask the millions of sports fans all over the world who do or do not play sports?

  43. Onyx said, on June 18, 2009 at 2:50 pm

    I catch Ninja Warrior on g4 from time to time, does that show barely come on or something?

  44. Patrick said, on June 18, 2009 at 5:05 pm

    Have you considered fire? I don’t mean that Yule Log video (Though, if you put that on TV and had celebrities talk about it, you’d make a shitload of yen.) but actual fire? Just go burn down the studios, make sure there’s nothing left. Then, tell the authorities that the TV made you do it. You’ll get off with a fine and having to make some kind of public apology, and then you can live your life free of this stuff for a few days.
    Or, introduce your wife to Hulu.com.

  45. Cameron said, on June 18, 2009 at 5:15 pm

    The most efficient way to resolve both the problems of the crappy quality of television programming and get your wife away from said craptastic shows is to come back to the good old US of A
    While it might deprive us of the entertainment value of your trials and tribulations as a resident of Japan, I know I would be willing to trade that for the sanity and well-being of a fellow brother and geek/video game junkie 🙂

  46. Diana said, on June 18, 2009 at 8:12 pm

    Next set of Tv shows you should do should have something that has to do with the S&M part of Japanese and how they love pain for…whatever odd reason it is. @_@

  47. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 8:36 pm

    i can only think of a few things, get her into video games mainly MMORPG’s for their addictiveness, another ting would be to take her out more often(if you can) thats about all i can think off.

  48. Anonymous said, on June 18, 2009 at 8:36 pm

    i can only think of a few things, get her into video games mainly MMORPG’s for their addictiveness, another ting would be to take her out more often(if you can) thats about all i can think off.

  49. Caleb said, on June 18, 2009 at 9:15 pm

    I am laughing SO hard at Jared Foust’s comments for so many reasons I could scarcely name them. Of all the people in the world to essentially accuse of racism, Az probably isn’t on the list.
    In addition, I can’t believe that you honestly wanted to compare sports to eating and talking. On the best of days I might manage a really terrible game of basketball, but I am pretty sure I can handle eating and talking. There really is a fundamental difference that, since you have chosen to ignore, shows you are just being facetious and argumentative.

  50. kristine said, on June 18, 2009 at 9:17 pm

    Ooh to the people trying to figure out the title. Yes, temps means day/time whatever, literally, but there’s the phrase air-du-temps or something like that which essentially means trends.
    Hence my previous translation taste trends.. Which kinda makes sense. Or yes, just a really mangled french phrase..

  51. Bissrok said, on June 18, 2009 at 9:26 pm

    I hope one day there’s a show about celebrities watching a show about celebrities eating and talking. I think it’d be something the people could relate to.
    (Az’s Note: Too slow. The Japanese already do this. The celebrities go out to a random location and eat, and the celebrities in studio watch the video, and we get a picture-in-picture of the celebrities watching the celebrities eating and talking.
    Isn’t that just grand?)

  52. mylhendir said, on June 18, 2009 at 9:39 pm

    Heya az, ignore that one guy who is bashing on you. you still got great stuff :)!! this stuff is hilarious and i for one appreciate the services you provide here. good luck with the tv thing and keep up the good work!!
    -matt of north carolina
    PS: as a person wanting to go through jet in the future, how often do the good anime shows come on? these kinda shows would make me suicidal….

  53. Ignats82 said, on June 18, 2009 at 10:24 pm

    Dude Japanese TV made me sell my TV. I got a fancy computer monitor to ensure that thee would be ZERO chance that Japanese TV would ever darken my day.

  54. Michael said, on June 18, 2009 at 10:26 pm

    Where does anime fit into the structure of Japanese TV? I know it’s on late at night.

  55. Tone said, on June 18, 2009 at 10:30 pm

    Hey, how about some American TV! Lets see whats on:
    1. People investigating (talking to themselves) “haunted” places (scaring themselves).
    2. People doing ____ in the wilderness.
    3. People trying to find out how/why someone is dead/dying.
    Replace “People” with anything: “Celebrities” (washed up), children, animals.
    Also remember that no matter how bad tv is abroad, The Jerry Springer Show is on its umpteenth season here in the good ol’ US of A.

  56. Kit said, on June 18, 2009 at 11:40 pm

    Sex and the City is good (and you have Samantha, who has sex with a different dude every episode. And your wife would probably like Charlotte) Weeds is a good one. House is good. The New Adventures of Old Christine (my mom is in love with this show). Project Runway (boyfriend’s suggestion). I guess anything that would be on Discovery Health (my favorite channel… but I’m weird)

  57. J-F said, on June 19, 2009 at 12:16 am

    I’m french and I can confirm that this title doesn’t make any sense (could be the equivalent of ‘engrish’… in french…), but people were right, literally translated it means Taste Time New… and the right spelling is “goût”, I’m not sure why the producers just didn’t call a native french by phone and ask ‘hey, does this make any sense?’
    When I was living in Japan I noticed a lot of shops signs, or even music lyrics trying to use french, and it mostly came out as non-sense. I especially like that band that called themselves Arc-en-Ciel (rainbow in french)… The gay pride mouvement is represented by a Rainbow here, so it sounds extremely gay to any native french when they hear a band called Arc-en-Ciel… but when I saw the singers, I figured maybe they already knew that…

  58. Rakuten said, on June 19, 2009 at 12:19 am

    I was already laughing through the first two paragraphs. Great work, Az.
    Btw, that Picard facepalm wasn’t enough for that situation.
    Try this instead:

  59. Marc said, on June 19, 2009 at 1:36 am

    Az.
    “My only problem now is finding a way to get my wife off these shows before I’m driven completely insane.”
    LMAO. Az, a word to the wise from someone who’s been in this boat (i.e. married, in Japan, to a Japanese woman… who, like the millions of other Japanese women in this country, is nuts enough to like Japanese TV.)… give up.
    Buy a straightjacket now. Make sure it’s nice and comfy. Because although you may woo her with Heroes, and Lost, and all those other western TV shows… although you may do this, given the choice she will sit down on the couch and switch back to Sanma-of-the-incredible-donkey-teeth or (my personal hate) that show with those two elderly gay guys telling other people how to live their lives RIGHT.
    So I repeat. Buy your straightjacket. Hell, get it tailored. You’re doomed.

  60. Moe said, on June 19, 2009 at 2:59 am

    Maybe they mean “gout” as in the disease, rather than the French word? Though it’s a little hard to believe that watching that show would give you gout.
    It seems like it ought to give you something much, much worse.

  61. nantoka said, on June 19, 2009 at 3:46 am

    OMG I received the “hobby:sleeping” answer too on one of my dates, I could not believe it.
    The fear man! the fear!
    my escape plan consisting of being incredibly boring to quickly end the date (and not have her msg me again) flew out the window, how can you dull out someone who’s hobby is sleeping?
    I found one girl that was quite funny and interesting. too undull for japanese men: was 25 and still single 😉
    about tv shows: moving out of Japan doesn’t work either, with youtube, niconico and what other video sites there are she can still download them.
    the waste of perfectly pron-capable bandwidth over that boring stuff that is most japanese tv is a shame.
    “hajime no otsukai” or whatever the name was is kinda fun tho, the thing with really young kids going to the store and being cute.
    of course the show is spoiled by celebrities going “aaaaaaaaaw” and giving inane comments on how cute the kid is or telling us the kid lost his shoe in case we missed it in the 3 instant replays.
    what I really miss is the Japanese version of who wants to be a millionaire, that stuff is gold.
    if you know some interesting Japanese TV shows please tell us, my wife is trying to find some show I can watch with her and I’m running out of fake-interest power.

  62. Noni said, on June 19, 2009 at 6:41 am

    Utilize the interwebs. ^_^
    There’s plenty of decent American TV out there streaming; hunt it down and ask her to watch it with you. TOGETHER. Give out heartfelt implications. Hell, maybe she’ll like it. X3
    Last night, my boyfriend and I watched a CEVO Left4Dead match (vVv vs .sur) together. And both enjoyed it. A few months ago, I prolly would have never followed any pro-gaming (not that I wasn’t a gamer…I was just mostly into RPGs instead of FPS). ^_^
    Women are easily molded from routine and convinced to try new things, when under the pretense of “spending time together.”

  63. Zolbrod said, on June 19, 2009 at 8:09 am

    I know I’m talking to a deaf man’s ears here, but I want to say this anyway.
    Have any of you nay-sayers ever considered the fact that the reason you don’t like it is because you are not the target audience?
    This Japanese TV made for/by Japanese people, who live in Japan, are Japanese, and both define and are defined by Japanese culture.
    Judging by the fact that several people, including Az, have stated that their wives (that includes mine btw) love these shows, who are we then to discard them as junk?
    Apparently, this is what Japanese like to see (for my 2 cents, I love a lot of Japanese shows too), so don’t you think it’s incredibly arrogant to disparage it, because it doesn’t answer to “our” Western tastes?
    Sounds like nothing but arrogant Gaijin megalomania to me.

  64. Kyata said, on June 19, 2009 at 8:44 am

    So is there nothing at all interesting on Japanese TV? >.>
    Maybe you could list your top 5 shows next (if any even exist):p

  65. rpsms said, on June 19, 2009 at 9:34 am

    “Trying to make conversation with one can be just as fun as trying to pull the wisdom teeth from a rabid sabretooth tiger, bare-handed”
    Thas may not be FUN, but it sure as hell wouldn’t be DULL!

  66. Andres0082 said, on June 19, 2009 at 11:02 am

    -Like, if Moses had stayed up on the mountain just wee bit longer, God would have carved “Thou Shalt Not Enjoy Daytime TV” as the 11th Commandment into the stone tablet.-
    Maybe it was written in the other 5 tablets Moses dropped in World´s History Part 1

  67. code monkey said, on June 19, 2009 at 11:41 am

    lol on the nickel-spinning thing…with Sanma overreacting.
    To those people suggesting the interwebs, outside of downloading illegal copies of shows, streaming sites for US shows don’t work outside of the US (cough-HULU-cough)…

  68. code monkey said, on June 19, 2009 at 12:01 pm

    “My only problem now is finding a way to get my wife off these shows before I’m driven completely insane.”
    Mess with the antenna? cables? Fray some of the fires so that they slightly but it’ll still look ok. When she gets it fixed, suggest that maybe the TV’s receiver is broken (so you can still use it for gaming) but you really can’t afford a new set.

  69. Alias said, on June 19, 2009 at 5:34 pm

    > OMG I received the “hobby:sleeping” answer too on one of my dates, I could not believe it.
    The fear man! the fear!
    You sure they didn’t mean sleeping as in sleeping with someone?
    It would at least make more sense…
    (Az’s Note: I wondered the same thing, but they really do mean just sleeping.)

  70. Moe said, on June 19, 2009 at 5:53 pm

    Completely OT, but knowing how much Az likes Street Fighter, I thought I should point out this video:
    http://www.chinasmack.com/videos/real-life-street-fighter-car-bonus-stage/

  71. Peachers said, on June 19, 2009 at 6:05 pm

    Maybe your lack of financial affluence could work to your advantage…
    Somehow destroy the channel port on the TV inconcpicuously and tell her “Sorry, no money to fix it”
    That way you can still game but the likes of that dragon-frog-man-alien-michaeljackson mallet thing will never been seen in your household again.

  72. Anonymous said, on June 19, 2009 at 8:02 pm

    > Apparently, this is what Japanese like to see (for my 2 cents, I love a lot of Japanese shows too), so don’t you think it’s incredibly arrogant to disparage it, because it doesn’t answer to “our” Western tastes?
    Pffft. You might as well tell Az to shut up and close down his blog, if you aren’t allowed to make fun of cultural differences. There’s nothing arrogant about it; obviously some Japanese enjoy this crap, or it wouldn’t be on the air, but that doesn’t make it any less crappy or deserving of ridicule for NON-Japanese.

  73. Anonymous said, on June 19, 2009 at 8:02 pm

    > Apparently, this is what Japanese like to see (for my 2 cents, I love a lot of Japanese shows too), so don’t you think it’s incredibly arrogant to disparage it, because it doesn’t answer to “our” Western tastes?
    Pffft. You might as well tell Az to shut up and close down his blog, if you aren’t allowed to make fun of cultural differences. There’s nothing arrogant about it; obviously some Japanese enjoy this crap, or it wouldn’t be on the air, but that doesn’t make it any less crappy or deserving of ridicule for NON-Japanese.

  74. RandomHelper said, on June 19, 2009 at 8:27 pm

    Dude, pick up or download the following shows:
    Firefly
    Doctor Who Series 1-3
    Dollhouse
    Buffy
    Angel
    Rome
    The Lost Room
    Basically anything good that’s come out in the last decade. I’m sure there’s subs available for these shows if your wife doesn’t understand enough English to enjoy them in their native format.
    Then, as she’s enjoying them, ask her if it’s better than Japanese TV. Then watch her face as all becomes right with the world.

  75. Anonymous said, on June 19, 2009 at 9:04 pm

    In the first part of this you pretty much said that in America our news tends to be sided more towards the side of things that are actually news. I’m afraid I’ve got to tell you that just isn’t so.
    The best example of this is NBC’s The Today Show, which is what I generally watch every morning. At first, it actually is almost entirely real, important news. Then eventually Al Roker gives his weather forecast. It’s at this point that the chances of obtaining any useful knowledge pretty much disappears, unless they bring Al out early because there’s some kind of big storm. They then generally proceed with their first look back at your local news and weather after some commercials, then more commercials and back to the show.
    Around then they normally decide to show the audience outside on Rockefeller Plaza (The most interesting thing about this for me is that there’s one guy who is always there, every morning, like clockwork, wearing big sunglasses and he always points to the camera when it pans towards him. He is obviously not a member of the staff but rather just some guy). After doing this the show reaches it’s second half hour and any chance of seeing real news has vanished.
    Once they’ve run out of real news, they run stupid pieces, generally on celebrities, such as the martial problems of the titular married couple from John and Kate Plus 8 (a horrible show, I might add). I remember after his election the show (and all of the media, really) followed President Obama to a nearly stalker-like level. During this time we learned a great deal of stupid facts about his family, particularly his wife and children. At Thanksgiving they even had a story telling us that the Obama family would indeed eat turkey for the holiday ,as if we couldn’t figure that out ourselves.
    At some point after I quit watching the show (I try to quit after the facts stop) the show loses the news aspect altogether and does stupid shit like cooking segments and fashion tips, as well as what I’ve been told is horrible advice on how to stay health and what not.

  76. Anonymous said, on June 19, 2009 at 9:04 pm

    In the first part of this you pretty much said that in America our news tends to be sided more towards the side of things that are actually news. I’m afraid I’ve got to tell you that just isn’t so.
    The best example of this is NBC’s The Today Show, which is what I generally watch every morning. At first, it actually is almost entirely real, important news. Then eventually Al Roker gives his weather forecast. It’s at this point that the chances of obtaining any useful knowledge pretty much disappears, unless they bring Al out early because there’s some kind of big storm. They then generally proceed with their first look back at your local news and weather after some commercials, then more commercials and back to the show.
    Around then they normally decide to show the audience outside on Rockefeller Plaza (The most interesting thing about this for me is that there’s one guy who is always there, every morning, like clockwork, wearing big sunglasses and he always points to the camera when it pans towards him. He is obviously not a member of the staff but rather just some guy). After doing this the show reaches it’s second half hour and any chance of seeing real news has vanished.
    Once they’ve run out of real news, they run stupid pieces, generally on celebrities, such as the martial problems of the titular married couple from John and Kate Plus 8 (a horrible show, I might add). I remember after his election the show (and all of the media, really) followed President Obama to a nearly stalker-like level. During this time we learned a great deal of stupid facts about his family, particularly his wife and children. At Thanksgiving they even had a story telling us that the Obama family would indeed eat turkey for the holiday ,as if we couldn’t figure that out ourselves.
    At some point after I quit watching the show (I try to quit after the facts stop) the show loses the news aspect altogether and does stupid shit like cooking segments and fashion tips, as well as what I’ve been told is horrible advice on how to stay health and what not.

  77. The Real Dakota Red said, on June 20, 2009 at 12:40 am

    Whenever a girl tells me that her hobby is sleeping, I say “Great! Mine too, let’s sleep together at this hotel…”

  78. Citric said, on June 20, 2009 at 1:08 am

    My god, it sounds like the five minutes of the View I watched once, except with less drunken Danny DeVito.

  79. Anonymous said, on June 20, 2009 at 1:54 am

    Get your wife to watch Star Trek.

  80. Anonymous said, on June 20, 2009 at 1:54 am

    Get your wife to watch Star Trek.

  81. not a doktor said, on June 20, 2009 at 3:45 am

    >Get your wife to watch Star Trek.
    It’d have to be George Takai and the chick from the prequel series eating while Shatner looses his toupe.

  82. RainbowSeven said, on June 20, 2009 at 4:58 am

    Sorry, Az: you’re just going to have to get her pregnant…that will keep her busy.

  83. Anonymous said, on June 20, 2009 at 1:56 pm

    Simple answer to a complex problem. MOVE THE HELL OUT OF THE COUNTRY! Fixed.

  84. Anonymous said, on June 20, 2009 at 1:56 pm

    Simple answer to a complex problem. MOVE THE HELL OUT OF THE COUNTRY! Fixed.

  85. Chris said, on June 21, 2009 at 12:03 am

    Clearly you need to tell the wife that you have consulted a World Renowned Expert On Fertility, and have been advised that, in order to make a more perfect baby, much practice is necessary in order to perfect technique and ensure the best possible kid.
    Or tell her the medical advice was that watching too much Japanese TV has a detrimental effect on her (and your) fertility, and, when pregnant, can harm the foetus.
    Less JTV = smarter, better looking children!

  86. Random Gaijin said, on June 21, 2009 at 10:49 am

    Dude i only seen one japanese T.V. show and it’s called Ninja Warrior. It comes on G4 and it’s ok to watch. The stuff you posted about sounds terrible! Well at least you have the internet so you can go to websites like Hulu and Fancast (both sites are free if you didn’t know) and watch some DECENT entertainment.

  87. Josh said, on June 22, 2009 at 1:51 am

    From above:
    Ninja Warrior (Sasuke in Japan) is a special show that they run between seasons of other shows as a ‘filler’. I just saw the new season on US TV tonite, and laughed because Bobby Ologun was a contestant on there. You’ll be happy to know, Az, that he didn’t come close to making it past the first round.
    Peace.

  88. Marc said, on June 22, 2009 at 3:04 am

    >Have any of you nay-sayers ever considered the fact that the reason you don’t like it is because you are not the target audience?
    This Japanese TV made for/by Japanese people, who live in Japan, are Japanese, and both define and a
    are defined by Japanese culture.
    Yep. But what’s probably closer to the truth is that most Japanese TV shows have miniscule budgets when compared to their western counterparts. Actors are paid far less. When it comes to the dramas, scriptwriters are sometimes writing scenes while they’re being shot. Japanese TV is produced for an audience of at most 120 million people. Production values are close to non-existent. But no-one wants to read subtitles or hear crappy voice-overs for too long, so there is a limited market for overseas TV. Hence Japanese TV production companies are out for maximum bang for the buck- cheap variety shows and low-budget dramas are at right area on the price curve.

  89. Sven Viking said, on June 22, 2009 at 10:42 am

    You may already know, but keep in mind that you can stream video from your PC to your PS3 (wired or via wifi) via TVersity or PS3 Media Server. Things like XVID files on DVD-R will also work, though without subtitle support.
    http://www.tversity.com/
    http://ps3mediaserver.blogspot.com/

  90. Sven Viking said, on June 22, 2009 at 11:01 am

    Also, in my experience it’s usually pretty easy to interest non-Japanese women in anime via Ghibli films -> Ghibli-like things such as Seirei no Moribito/The Girl Who Leapt Through Time, or something with a more mature, intriguing mystery plot like Monster. From what you’ve said I’m guessing that may not be an option, but only a suggestion.
    What about plot-based games (e.g. Indigo Prophesy, or adventure games on the PC), or something where the experience is the important thing (ICO, Shadow of the Colossus, the Last Guardian), where she might be coaxed into watching, suggesting possibly puzzle solutions, etc., even if she won’t play herself?
    http://www.gamerankings.com/ps2/544598-indigo-prophecy/index.html
    http://www.gamerankings.com/ps2/367472-ico/index.html
    http://www.gamerankings.com/ps2/924364-shadow-of-the-colossus/index.html
    http://www.gametrailers.com/video/e3-09-the-last/50352

  91. Sven Viking said, on June 22, 2009 at 11:25 am

    Sorry for the triple post, don’t authorize this one if you prefer, but forgot this earlier: I can’t imagine any woman not enjoying Flower (downloadable from the Playstation Store). Since it has no losing conditions, it’s a good gateway game, too.
    http://www.gamerankings.com/ps3/943340-flower/index.html
    Concentrating on Playstation stuff in these suggestions since I know you own a PS3. There are a lot more casual, co-operative options on something like the Wii.

  92. Weilong said, on June 22, 2009 at 5:11 pm

    I’m fortunate to have found a Japanese woman who finds Japanese pop culture just as banal as I do. The marriage would never have worked otherwise.
    There was a time in my life when I lived in Japan and watched a lot of TV in a state of disbelief. I was fascinated by just how utterly, amazingly inane it was. That got boring after a couple of months. I can’t understand how people can keep watching that crap their whole lives.

  93. Random said, on June 22, 2009 at 6:18 pm

    Have you got a parental lock of some kind on your cable box? You could lock out all the standard Japanese television, in favor of the international stuff from the US and Britain and what not. As she acclimates to thinking while watching TV, she will in time find Japanese television repelling.

  94. Alita said, on June 22, 2009 at 9:04 pm

    Aww, I love Gout Temps Nouveau. It really depends on who the two guests are on how interesting the conversation. Yes it’s still just normal conversation but it’s getting a side of the celebrities that you don’t get often. When Kago was on there it was really interesting because seeing scandal laden Kago talk about something besides her scandals was nice.
    Plus I’m moving to Tokyo and can actually go and eat some of these awesome cakes they introduce ^^.
    And yeah sleepings not a hobby but it is hilarious to get as an answer “So what do you want to do this weekend?” “Sleep”… yeah well me too but sometimes more interesting things are fun to do.

  95. Someone who gets Asians said, on June 23, 2009 at 3:17 am

    anything is entertaining if you try hard enough to go past the threshold.
    Then it’s smooth sailing.

  96. Nick said, on June 23, 2009 at 6:18 am

    I’ve been trying my best to think of clever ways to get these girls to be more exciting but when faced with such hobbies… well.. 6 dates down, more to go i guess v_v

  97. Rob said, on June 23, 2009 at 2:08 pm

    You folks are all making me feel bad for liking these light-hearted shows…

  98. Anonymous said, on June 23, 2009 at 9:31 pm

    Just start screaming. Not angry, not like your in pain, not sexual, just a child-like “AAH AAH AAH” over and over again until the TV is off. If she starts freaking out because something is clearly wrong, the first time, just calmly walk over to the TV and turn it off, screaming all the while, stopping once it’s off, then go back to your business as if nothing ever happened.
    If the TV comes back on, the incessant screaming returns, until it is off again. Refuse to acknowledge that you are doing it when you aren’t, and respond to nothing while you are. In fact, this method is pretty effective for most, if not all, pleasant things–made more true by the fact that I presume any and all non-gaijin acquainted Japanese people would be frightened, or at least put off, by a large black man screaming like a 3-year-old.
    Should this become your response to problems in the future, I look forward to arguments with your future children.
    Az’s Child: AAH AAH AAH
    Az’s Wife: That’s not how you ask for something. Stop screaming and say it properly. Az, help.
    Az: AAH AAH AAH
    Az’s Child: AAH AAH AAH
    Az: AAH AAH AAH
    Az’s Child: AAH AAH AAH
    Az’s Wife: http://img512.imageshack.us/img512/1708/facepalm1tf7.jpg

  99. Anonymous said, on June 23, 2009 at 9:31 pm

    Just start screaming. Not angry, not like your in pain, not sexual, just a child-like “AAH AAH AAH” over and over again until the TV is off. If she starts freaking out because something is clearly wrong, the first time, just calmly walk over to the TV and turn it off, screaming all the while, stopping once it’s off, then go back to your business as if nothing ever happened.
    If the TV comes back on, the incessant screaming returns, until it is off again. Refuse to acknowledge that you are doing it when you aren’t, and respond to nothing while you are. In fact, this method is pretty effective for most, if not all, pleasant things–made more true by the fact that I presume any and all non-gaijin acquainted Japanese people would be frightened, or at least put off, by a large black man screaming like a 3-year-old.
    Should this become your response to problems in the future, I look forward to arguments with your future children.
    Az’s Child: AAH AAH AAH
    Az’s Wife: That’s not how you ask for something. Stop screaming and say it properly. Az, help.
    Az: AAH AAH AAH
    Az’s Child: AAH AAH AAH
    Az: AAH AAH AAH
    Az’s Child: AAH AAH AAH
    Az’s Wife: http://img512.imageshack.us/img512/1708/facepalm1tf7.jpg

  100. Anonymous said, on June 23, 2009 at 10:39 pm

    Japanese tv shows r boring/weird that’s why I’m at the opening night of Tranformers 2.

  101. Anonymous said, on June 23, 2009 at 10:39 pm

    Japanese tv shows r boring/weird that’s why I’m at the opening night of Tranformers 2.

  102. Anonymous said, on June 24, 2009 at 1:10 am

    It can’t all be crap. Three words: Vermillion Pleasure Night. Granted, it didn’t last very long, and isn’t playing now, but you get the idea. (Come on, Azure. Come on! It’s soooooo good.)
    Also, just to make your skin crawl: you realize that garbage like this is becoming more common on american tv now that advertising dollars are drying up and networks figure it’s easier and cheaper to do variety, game shows, and ‘reality’ tv, right?
    Television truly is a wasteland no matter where you go. *sigh*

  103. Anonymous said, on June 24, 2009 at 1:10 am

    It can’t all be crap. Three words: Vermillion Pleasure Night. Granted, it didn’t last very long, and isn’t playing now, but you get the idea. (Come on, Azure. Come on! It’s soooooo good.)
    Also, just to make your skin crawl: you realize that garbage like this is becoming more common on american tv now that advertising dollars are drying up and networks figure it’s easier and cheaper to do variety, game shows, and ‘reality’ tv, right?
    Television truly is a wasteland no matter where you go. *sigh*

  104. Ivan the Terrible said, on June 24, 2009 at 3:10 am

    BTW, you have a pretty big opening to get her off of Japanese television and onto the American stuff; if the two of you are planning on going to the United States, she should probably be watching American television for the English practice anyway.
    I’m making the wild assumption she intends to eventually learn English well enough to not have to rely on you as a perpetual crutch, of course.

  105. MW said, on June 25, 2009 at 7:58 am

    These shows do sound pretty stupid, but it’s silly that you expect everybody to take for granted that a show will be bad because it features nothing but people sitting around and talking. Do you really think that people and talking are inherently uninteresting? You’re either insane, or a lazy writer.
    But anyway, here’s a solution: Get a divorce.

  106. B said, on June 25, 2009 at 9:13 am

    I’ve been living in Japan since September and… what really bothers me about TV-shows here:
    You can watch countless stupid dorama (whether it be something about doctors, policemen, just plain school-life, love, …) which more or less all have the same plot. If it’s a police-story, you definitely know, what happens next. If it’s a doctor-soap, you know, what will happen for the entire episode after only watching about 2 minutes.
    And the sponsoring-always-appear-when-not-needed-CM (commercial). I don’t need to be reminded every 5 minutes for a minute, that the sponsors are X, Y and Z!
    But yeah… most of Japanese TV is not what westerners like to watch.
    I pick 1 or 2 dorama (mainly because there is SOMETHING new in them or they are historical, ’cause I’m interested in history) and that’s about it as long as you don’t count my love for Japanese music (and the TV-shows which update them week for week for week for week …)
    I have to admit that I like Tamori’s “waratte ii tomo”. I can cook while watching it. But I hardly get out of university by the time it’s aired *laughs* so I don’t see much of it.
    Keep us up to date on what your life is like here in the land of the rising sun.
    Peace
    B
    PS:
    The movies are worse than any programm… I just watched “Eraser” and it just doesn’t fit, when Arnold Schwarzenegger keeps talking Japanese *laughs*

  107. Tunod said, on June 25, 2009 at 2:29 pm

    Dear lord. It all finally makes sense.
    This explains anime and manga. It explains the sheer breadth and depth of different genres, age-levels, subjects and character types witnessed in the medium.
    It’s all the desperate cry for help of a creative minority that is slowly but surely drowning under an unending tide of “UMAI!” that threatens to engulf them to the last man (or woman). The entire creative genius of a nation has been funneled into one small minority, and the rest of the nation ignores them as they ignore their own inner child in favor of homogeneous TV entertainment! Oh, the humanity! THE HUMANITY!
    Also, I still think an article on what it’s like to adapt to the Japanese bathroom would be interesting and hilarious.

  108. coolio said, on June 25, 2009 at 8:46 pm

    Haha! You should wait until your wife pops out her first baby, then you’ll learn about the real shit in Japanese TV! A few minutes of: “Shimajiro”, “Anpanman” or “Nihongo de Asobu” converts every manly calm guy in to a raging dickhead. Don’t have heavy things near to your sofa, because you will throw them at your TV.

  109. jook said, on June 25, 2009 at 9:35 pm

    @david: The punishment for “first!” posts is ten thousand papercuts, covered in lime juice, and set on fire, then hung, drawn, quartered, dragged through the city by a pack of trained goats, trampled, blended and shat upon.
    Get started on that.
    @anonymous /actual/ first commenter: She doesn’t speak any English, it’s been mentioned before.

  110. Anonymous said, on June 25, 2009 at 9:42 pm

    Start her in the direction of becoming a Japanese language teacher in the US (assuming you’re going back). She’ll need to spiff up her English and once you get her used to spending time on the computer using Rosetta Stone or something you could start to send her other things to do online…which…is…yes…a step up.
    And since the money thing is tight this would be the perfect time for her to read up on Child Development for that phase. There are definite hints in such books as to the lacking nature of any tv watching habits and will make her realize she has to develop herself before she can ever expect to guide the proper development of a child into an adult that does more than just go to work, watch tv, shop and sleep.
    Not trying to get too personal but framing it this way should make a point. I’m sure any one of our parents didn’t bring us into the world to become great audience members. The importance of participation…that’s the key. I know I’m battling that stage where I’m thinking that I don’t want to be on my deathbed and realizing I’m nothing more than a receptacle for memories of bad tv. Gotta get the fear of death in her!

  111. Anonymous said, on June 25, 2009 at 9:42 pm

    Start her in the direction of becoming a Japanese language teacher in the US (assuming you’re going back). She’ll need to spiff up her English and once you get her used to spending time on the computer using Rosetta Stone or something you could start to send her other things to do online…which…is…yes…a step up.
    And since the money thing is tight this would be the perfect time for her to read up on Child Development for that phase. There are definite hints in such books as to the lacking nature of any tv watching habits and will make her realize she has to develop herself before she can ever expect to guide the proper development of a child into an adult that does more than just go to work, watch tv, shop and sleep.
    Not trying to get too personal but framing it this way should make a point. I’m sure any one of our parents didn’t bring us into the world to become great audience members. The importance of participation…that’s the key. I know I’m battling that stage where I’m thinking that I don’t want to be on my deathbed and realizing I’m nothing more than a receptacle for memories of bad tv. Gotta get the fear of death in her!

  112. Anonymous said, on June 25, 2009 at 10:13 pm

    Omg…someone/s mentioned taking up “the more mature-themed anime”…their one example of a series being “Monster”….
    Blood and violence and sex DO NOT EQUAL MATURE.
    That series in particular has so many mindfarts in the plot conception and especially the delivery of the script that it is on the same level as most doramas and “primetime” shows. I’m not trying to push into hyperbole …it all comes off as really bad acting.
    But that’s aside the point. You could line up all the best doramas, anime, etc. from Japan and it wouldn’t add up to 4 months of viewing time (assuming 60 min./day). What do you do after that? Replay? Nope. Best get mobile and doing things and find some way to demonize tv in her mind. Challenge her. She is the queen of your castle. Or get American cable stations and get addicted to the Histry channel and other science related shows. Or read. Reading’s good. Cooking classes? Hobbies of all kinds … volunteer work… etc. I suppose that means you’ll have to partake as well, so, tread carefully. Parttime job? Learn a trade or skill? Start a business? Ah! Book to home-teach your kid! She can plan that out! Hehehehe….it’s all coming up.

  113. Anonymous said, on June 25, 2009 at 10:13 pm

    Omg…someone/s mentioned taking up “the more mature-themed anime”…their one example of a series being “Monster”….
    Blood and violence and sex DO NOT EQUAL MATURE.
    That series in particular has so many mindfarts in the plot conception and especially the delivery of the script that it is on the same level as most doramas and “primetime” shows. I’m not trying to push into hyperbole …it all comes off as really bad acting.
    But that’s aside the point. You could line up all the best doramas, anime, etc. from Japan and it wouldn’t add up to 4 months of viewing time (assuming 60 min./day). What do you do after that? Replay? Nope. Best get mobile and doing things and find some way to demonize tv in her mind. Challenge her. She is the queen of your castle. Or get American cable stations and get addicted to the Histry channel and other science related shows. Or read. Reading’s good. Cooking classes? Hobbies of all kinds … volunteer work… etc. I suppose that means you’ll have to partake as well, so, tread carefully. Parttime job? Learn a trade or skill? Start a business? Ah! Book to home-teach your kid! She can plan that out! Hehehehe….it’s all coming up.

  114. Scott said, on June 26, 2009 at 11:05 am

    I’ve been in japan for about 3 months now, and I agree 100%. the tv is terrible. I can’t take the “eeeeeehhhh?!?” / “oishii!” any more. When my wife (Japanese) is watching one of those shows I have to go back to the computer.
    Oh. What’s up with j-news??? Almost nothing about Iran. Instead, the top story was about 7/11 being able to discount obento.
    The real issue with j-tv is the lack of choices. There are five channels all showing the same crap all day. In the us, you can at least find something interesting on espn, CNN, discovery, etc…
    Also, the variety shows are bad, but the dramas and movies are even worse. Terrible acting, lighting, camera work and writing. My wife and I had to walk out and demand a refund after trying to watch Rookies! a few weeks ago.

  115. darklings said, on June 26, 2009 at 1:28 pm

    I’d love to see a blog entry of what it’s like right now in a country that adored MJ.

  116. Seraph said, on June 26, 2009 at 5:27 pm

    Agree to watch an hour of tv with her, but only if she gives you a handjob while you’re watching it. That, or she gives you a BJ whenever you play videogames.
    For a more likely solution though, just explain to her that the lack of American tv is making you feel homesick and that you’d really appreciate it if she’d watch some with you. Maybe go on a picnic with her and say you saw [insert random talentless celebrity] in that park for some extra incentive. Tell her that you’d like to make “special, loving memories” with her (take that in whatever context you will). Show her that the love you guys share is more important than any videogame or tv show out there.
    Basically, ravage her until she doesn’t have enough energy to even pick up the remote.

  117. RudyD said, on June 26, 2009 at 9:02 pm

    Although what Az says is true (I perplexedly watched my share of it when I was in Japan), it’s not *all* bad all day long (just 90 percent of it).
    When I was there, Prison Break was also airing (like it or not, it’s at least definitely less boring than that game/eat/celeb drivel), and sometimes, a decent (foreign) movie came along, too.
    “in anime via Ghibli films -> Ghibli-like things such as Seirei no Moribito/The Girl Who Leapt Through Time, or something with a more mature, intriguing mystery plot like Monster.”
    While Monster and Ghibli and GiTS are definitely better than 95 per cent of what’s out there in anime, the sad thing is that it’s also just that meagre 5 per cent that’s decent. Because let’s face it, most of anime is just as much cr*p as daytime TV – especially the popular, mainstream, braindead stuff.

  118. Sven Viking said, on June 27, 2009 at 11:16 pm

    “Omg…someone/s mentioned taking up “the more mature-themed anime”…their one example of a series being “Monster”….
    Blood and violence and sex DO NOT EQUAL MATURE.”
    The blood/violence/sex is mostly pretty tame in Monster. The plot holes I agree on, and it often intrigues more than it delivers, but others are suggesting shows like Heroes and Lost which, while good, have the same problems. This is fairly standard for TV shows.
    By mature I just mean that it’s about a doctor in Düsseldorf dealing with hospital politics, hippocratic moral quandries, being framed for murder by a possible antichrist, etc. — as opposed to a high-school student needing to discover his hidden potential and power up to fight aliens in a giant robot.

  119. Sven Viking said, on June 27, 2009 at 11:16 pm

    “Omg…someone/s mentioned taking up “the more mature-themed anime”…their one example of a series being “Monster”….
    Blood and violence and sex DO NOT EQUAL MATURE.”
    The blood/violence/sex is mostly pretty tame in Monster. The plot holes I agree on, and it often intrigues more than it delivers, but others are suggesting shows like Heroes and Lost which, while good, have the same problems. This is fairly standard for TV shows.
    By mature I just mean that it’s about a doctor in Düsseldorf dealing with hospital politics, hippocratic moral quandaries, being framed for murder by a possible antichrist, etc. — as opposed to a high-school student needing to discover his hidden potential and power up to fight aliens in a giant robot.

  120. Sven Viking said, on June 27, 2009 at 11:21 pm

    @RudyD: That’s just Sturgeon’s Law in action. That only _most_ anime is “as much cr*p as daytime TV” is the exact point.

  121. Anonymous said, on June 28, 2009 at 12:29 pm

    Someone probably asked in this long list of comments, but just in case . . . Since your wife loves to watch TV, does that mean she’s ridiculously boring just like most other Japanese women?

  122. Anonymous said, on June 28, 2009 at 12:29 pm

    Someone probably asked in this long list of comments, but just in case . . . Since your wife loves to watch TV, does that mean she’s ridiculously boring just like most other Japanese women?

  123. Ljufa said, on June 28, 2009 at 4:52 pm

    It’s because women are so god damned boring that people always accuse me of being a man online. Sigh. I don’t know, I think society pushes women to be boring. I’m doing my best to put an end, but there’s only so much one person can do.
    I had a friend in middle school – I didn’t know she played video games until I first visited her home and saw all her systems. I was shocked and surprised because I talked about video games all the time and she never reciprocated. She still acted like it wasn’t a hobby of hers while at school, I guess it wasn’t girly enough or something and she thought it would ruin her reputation. I told her quite clearly that she’d find a boyfriend a lot sooner if she’d reveal this part of her life to others, but alas…

  124. Maelyn said, on June 28, 2009 at 5:09 pm

    “If you all have any suggestions, I’d love to hear them.”
    Sims 3. Create a family, move it into a premade house. Set them to fully autonomous to minimize how much input they need from you. Hook the console or pc up to the TV and broadcast the Sims’ antics. She’ll love watching them go about their daily lives, and it’s got to be better than a regular TV show.

  125. john deere said, on June 29, 2009 at 9:11 pm

    hey AZ, how are the japanese reacting to MJ’s death? Are they making a big fuzz over it?

  126. Mike said, on June 29, 2009 at 11:41 pm

    “Taiwanese television is also awful, and apparently in almost exactly the same way Japanese television is awful. Variety shows with ‘wacky’ sound effects randomly inserted into the action are the mainstay, and thus I’ve been forced to avoid television like the plague for both my continued sanity and my lingering faith in the essential goodness of humanity. ”
    DUDE ITS BECAUSE THE TAWANESE WERE OWNED BY THE JAPS FOR MANY YEARS I NOTICED THAT THEY ACT JUST LIKE THEM AND DRESS LIKE THEM TOO.

  127. John said, on June 30, 2009 at 12:40 am

    Hey Az, are you excited to watch Transformers? Not sure if its come out in Japan yet.

  128. Anonymous said, on July 1, 2009 at 5:21 pm

    I’m going to state the obvious: throw out TV. Or just don’t connect the signal cable – keep it designated as the console screen.
    Oh, BTW: I don’t own a TV and I rarely watch it. It’s been 2-3 years in a TV-free household.

  129. Anonymous said, on July 1, 2009 at 5:21 pm

    I’m going to state the obvious: throw out TV. Or just don’t connect the signal cable – keep it designated as the console screen.
    Oh, BTW: I don’t own a TV and I rarely watch it. It’s been 2-3 years in a TV-free household.

  130. The View said, on July 1, 2009 at 10:11 pm

    Off topic, but all “Transformers” fans need to see this.
    It’s insane.

  131. View said, on July 1, 2009 at 10:33 pm

    Off topic, may also be a double post.
    All “Transformers” fans, check these vids out.
    Ridiculous cosplay.

  132. dave said, on July 2, 2009 at 9:56 am

    JUST CUT THE ANTENNA CABLE OFF
    you dont need it for games
    and as stated above, that “aura” show with the monk and the yellow haired TS Miwa is also horrible : my wife here in France where we have sometimes better show than japan watches it ON FUCKING YOUTUBE all the time !

  133. Prism said, on July 3, 2009 at 9:56 pm

    “So keep this in mind – if you just happen to be free some day and want to randomly ask a Japanese friend of yours out for some conversation and food or drinks, without making a proper appointment well in advance to do so, you will probably be turned down. Your Japanese friend (especially if female) will then watch a TV show where people have conversations, food and drinks.”
    I’ve found this to be particularily annoying, my japanese friends do not like impromtu “hey i was just walking by your place and felt like coffee, want to go?”
    scheduling free time is silly, maybe being canadian i’m just too used to going with the flow, V_V

  134. Anonymous said, on July 5, 2009 at 10:46 am


    please lose faith in humanity after watching this. thank you.

  135. Anonymous said, on July 5, 2009 at 10:46 am




    please lose faith in humanity after watching this. thank you.

  136. Captain Usopp said, on July 6, 2009 at 2:25 am

    It seems like the most logical thing to do now would be have a Top 5 Favorite Japanese TV.

  137. Sven Viking said, on July 7, 2009 at 11:24 am

    @Captain Usopp
    Or, at least, a “Furthest From the Bottom 5”.

  138. Deckers said, on July 7, 2009 at 6:57 pm

    I can’t help but cringe horribly at all these shows, I took a look at that one with the idiot with the staff. the one which looks like something my 5 year old sister owns.
    This man is… entertaining? Wait, big 3? So, essentially, this man is one of the -most- entertaining “entertainers”?
    I don’t even want to know how bad his competition is if he’s in such a secure position; I couldn’t watch more than 20 seconds if that of the video.
    I’ve read your blog for a long time, but I’ve finally decided to post because there’s something that has personally united me in your hate of “gout temps nouveau”.
    I moved to France at the age of 2/3 and lived there till I was 9, and it’s well known that I hate people using French to sound “sophisticated”.
    From the times I visited, I thought American women were the worst offenders of this, but now I find a popular tv show named this…
    So, I assume a show with 3 women going to cafés calling itself new taste time thinks it’s being quite swanky… so, does this magic formula work if I name a show “La merde nouveau”, since everyone is oblivious to the meaning of the words?
    On that note A. I doubt any of them who don’t have French tutors can roll their r’s & B. this supposedly several year running show is riding on the “We’re sophisticated with our token foreign words we don’t understand” and managed to cock it up (they mispelt goút).
    I imagine the women featured are as monotonous and spout as much otherwise labelled sexism as “Loose women” (our version of “the view” I guess).
    On the other hand, I couldn’t care less if these women were professional taste testers or restaurant critics, I don’t want to hear what wasn’t done right or how it tastes, this is as bad as the people who run their cars on vegetable oil; what with all the bystanders getting a whiff of chips (fries to you, “French fries”, mind telling me what makes them French? No one ever managed to justify that one to me) and helplessly rummages in their pockets for some change to go sate their new food craving.
    Did you know there’s actually something called Paris syndrome?
    It applies specifically to Japanese tourists who need the japanese embassy to send them home because they’re in such shock that Paris isn’t a perfect super sophisticated land of romance, cheese and wine but actually has very filthy streets and is full of people speaking a language they can’t understand.
    The Japanese embassy stays open 24/7 just incase someone suffers such irreversable terror from the culture shock that they must be rushed home to the motherland before they accept that not everything abides by stereotypes.
    On average 14 people suffer from this each year… it is odd it got made an official symdrome but I felt like throwing it in.

  139. Kyle G said, on July 8, 2009 at 5:41 pm

    @Kristine:
    You’re thinking of Kasou Taishou (全日本仮装大賞): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kasou_Taishou
    The Matrix Ping Pong clip you provided comes from that show.

  140. Tim said, on July 8, 2009 at 8:53 pm

    Use http://www.cuteoverload.com to distract her and steal the remote. Or…get this
    http://www.crunchgear.com/2009/07/06/the-return-of-the-tv-b-gone/
    Gizmodo got perm banned from all future CES for this.

  141. Dan said, on July 11, 2009 at 1:09 pm

    So…when are you going to throw up a post? With M.J. dying, etc. you MUST have something to say no? You must be really busy not to have done this already, I guess.

  142. jamar said, on July 13, 2009 at 1:42 am

    @Kyle G: So that’s what it’s called. I loved watching that show too in China(dubbed in Chinese- I barely speak Japanese). It was one of the few non-news programs on Chinese TV that I actually liked. Looking back, most of the stuff that I liked to watch on TV in China was dubbed dorama. The only locally-made stuff I would watch was the news programs because it’s mostly Japanese-style variety shows.

  143. DK said, on July 15, 2009 at 9:33 am

    “Trying to make conversation with one can be just as fun as trying to pull the wisdom teeth from a rabid sabretooth tiger, bare-handed.”
    But… wouldn’t that be… interesting?

  144. Anonymous said, on July 17, 2009 at 10:46 pm

    Be glad, since television shows in mainland china is worst than the Japanese ones….on some degree. The Chinese version of Ninja warrior is worst than the Japanese version. I sometimes want to claw my eyes out, but i suppose the dramas are okey. Ever wonder why Asian youth are otakus and anime/gaming fans? That’s the reason….Grin,eat, Oiishi……repeat, repeat, and weird sound effects. American shows are the best thing for entertainment ever. if your wife married you, then she wouldn’t really oppose to a little dose of Americanization sometimes. Show her Law and Order or something……

  145. Anonymous said, on July 17, 2009 at 10:46 pm

    Be glad, since television shows in mainland china is worst than the Japanese ones….on some degree. The Chinese version of Ninja warrior is worst than the Japanese version. I sometimes want to claw my eyes out, but i suppose the dramas are okey. Ever wonder why Asian youth are otakus and anime/gaming fans? That’s the reason….Grin,eat, Oiishi……repeat, repeat, and weird sound effects. American shows are the best thing for entertainment ever. if your wife married you, then she wouldn’t really oppose to a little dose of Americanization sometimes. Show her Law and Order or something……

  146. harish said, on July 18, 2009 at 4:38 am

    Your blog is nice. and you have tell good about tv shows. You article is nice about tv shows.

  147. george said, on July 20, 2009 at 8:34 pm

    good day
    It’s george. i contacted you before about exchanging banner. I haven’t heard from you yet. I’m wondering would you still be interested in it. drop me an email if you are okay with it.
    Cheers!

  148. Anonymous said, on July 21, 2009 at 9:14 am

    Az,.. why don’t you vie for your own TV program?
    An outsiders view on Japan (of course you’ll have to say how great it is to te able to live in Japan etc etc)… I mean they have already used americans in J-commercials …why not go a step further and score a day time show?
    Pro:
    – large female fanbase
    – instant VIP
    – $$$ (couldn’t find the Yen valuta)
    con:
    – if they ever find this site then you are pretty much screwed.

  149. Anonymous said, on July 21, 2009 at 9:14 am

    Az,.. why don’t you vie for your own TV program?
    An outsiders view on Japan (of course you’ll have to say how great it is to te able to live in Japan etc etc)… I mean they have already used americans in J-commercials …why not go a step further and score a day time show?
    Pro:
    – large female fanbase
    – instant VIP
    – $$$ (couldn’t find the Yen valuta)
    con:
    – if they ever find this site then you are pretty much screwed.

  150. T. said, on July 21, 2009 at 7:15 pm

    You know, you may have an idea on that nickel spinning idea. Each episode you spin a different currency, or a different item, or do things like try to rub your tummy and pat your head, and each day have a different guest and talk and eat with them at the same time.
    Day 1 is nickel spinning with Az’s mother in law! Topic is food.
    Day 2 is bottle spinning with the next door neighbor! Topic is apartment living.
    Day 3 is singing crystal glasses with a random person from the street! Topic is flower arrangements.
    Az- there’s ten years worth of entertainment waiting to be seized!
    And by your own statements, who wouldn’t want to watch a black gaijin on TV?

  151. John Jackson said, on July 22, 2009 at 12:35 pm

    Do a barrel roll!!!

  152. Michael Havers said, on July 23, 2009 at 8:44 am

    Your comments about the TV shows here are spot on and have you noticed how racist some of the presenters are? If we said or did the same things back home, there’d be an uproar. I hate the shows where they put on blond wigs, fake oversized noses and pretend to be American. If a white guy did the same thing in the states, he’d be lynched.

  153. slsonic said, on July 24, 2009 at 2:46 am

    “. And that’s when everything clicked – Japanese TV is primarily meant for Japanese women. So its like a combination of daytime TV and the Lifetime Channel, on every channel, 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.
    So, for us guys, this is more or less the first step into Hell itself.”
    I feel for you man, I really do. But you have to remember they call the Tv an idiot box for a reason, adn that is 98% of shows are mind numbing.
    Anyways if you want to make your wife stop watching those tv programs try getting her into watching movies. Rent a good one from a store or over the internet, or just watch a movie channel.
    And to the guy that posted the Robogeisha link…please tell me that is NOT a real movie. And if it is, PLEASE tell me it’s not coming to theaters. I’ve already lost my faith in humanity but I don’t want salt on my wounds D:

  154. Jake said, on July 24, 2009 at 5:11 am

    Hey man you should like have a video chat with all of us someday when you have time with http://www.blogtv.com
    That would be freaking cool.

  155. Anonymous said, on July 24, 2009 at 9:15 pm

    Just a few days ago, I was watching the boob tube and I saw a commercial for a TV show that seemed to revolve around two women sitting around talking about Martha Stewart. I now have sufficient reason to begin plotting the destruction of the human race.

  156. Anonymous said, on July 24, 2009 at 9:15 pm

    Just a few days ago, I was watching the boob tube and I saw a commercial for a TV show that seemed to revolve around two women sitting around talking about Martha Stewart. I now have sufficient reason to begin plotting the destruction of the human race.

  157. Bob Viking said, on July 24, 2009 at 9:57 pm

    So… Is there any Japanese TV you like? Any at all? I ask chiefly because a station in my country aired the nutso gameshow (I don’t think anyone ever won though) “Takeshi’s Castle” on Sunday mornings as part of their Hangover TV program, and I remember thinking that if that was the standard then Japanese TV must be the best shit anywhere ever… Meaning these editorials have been somewhat of a disappointing revelation.

  158. Jonnyboy said, on July 26, 2009 at 3:13 pm

    Az, you alive???????????

  159. Jackie from Cali said, on July 27, 2009 at 3:49 am

    just wondering Az, are you able to access hulu.com? i wasn’t sure if japan blocks certain websites and all. you can watch most of the american tv shows on here…past and present. of course, you can also access the 3 big network tv websites to watch any episode of current tv shows/late night shows you wanted to watch…
    (Az’s Note: Hulu, all of that stuff is blocked by region.)

  160. Troy said, on July 29, 2009 at 2:55 am

    It seems like the most logical thing to do now would be have a Top 5 Favorite Japanese TV.
    I was thinking the same thing . . .
    1. Gilgamesh Naito
    2. Tonight 2
    3. Bokura no Ongaku
    4. TBS’s World Heritage show
    5. Today’s Japan with Karuna Shinsho
    1 & 2 . . . you had to be here in the mid-90s.
    #5 was what got me to Japan in the first place, when it was airing on KCET Monday through Thursday.

  161. Anonymous said, on July 30, 2009 at 12:57 am

    Man! I just saw that one at number one! I tried to watch it for about 30 seconds because Gackt was on it (I can be persuaded to watch ANYTHING if he’s in it; that man is fucking hilarious) and couldn’t go on! If not even Gackt appearing on it can make me watch it, nothing ever will. Dude, I could handle Hey!x3 and even stomach the ever boring old Tamori, but GODDAMN if I have to watch a huge group off over-tarted-up, mind-numbingly dull trend-followers drone on and on about the kind of guy they like, I WILL reach for a shotgun. And I’m a girl!

  162. Anonymous said, on July 30, 2009 at 12:57 am

    Man! I just saw that one at number one! I tried to watch it for about 30 seconds because Gackt was on it (I can be persuaded to watch ANYTHING if he’s in it; that man is fucking hilarious) and couldn’t go on! If not even Gackt appearing on it can make me watch it, nothing ever will. Dude, I could handle Hey!x3 and even stomach the ever boring old Tamori, but GODDAMN if I have to watch a huge group off over-tarted-up, mind-numbingly dull trend-followers drone on and on about the kind of guy they like, I WILL reach for a shotgun. And I’m a girl!

  163. Anonymous said, on July 30, 2009 at 4:45 am

    Good lord update your webpage someday!

  164. Anonymous said, on July 30, 2009 at 4:45 am

    Good lord update your webpage someday!

  165. Ben M said, on August 1, 2009 at 2:31 am

    Illegally download some American TV. Mad Men is currently the best show in the US at the moment, I think. Of course, there are other good shows: The Office, Lost, Arrested Development, House, and so on. I’m sure you can watch some of those shows on TV in Japan, as it is. My friend said he kept up with 24 in Japan. Apparently Jack Bauer is somewhat of a god over there?

  166. Anonymous said, on August 4, 2009 at 7:49 pm

    I love japanese shows they keep my girlfriend entertained so i can go play computer games without her wanting my attention all the time

  167. Anonymous said, on August 4, 2009 at 7:49 pm

    I love japanese shows they keep my girlfriend entertained so i can go play computer games without her wanting my attention all the time

  168. ZedPower said, on August 6, 2009 at 8:49 pm

    Not to put too fine a point on it, Deckers, but, uh…
    “they mispelt goút”
    You also mispelt goût. 😛

  169. Hatman said, on August 7, 2009 at 4:10 pm

    Adding to all the “gout temps nouveau” theories, it actually makes more sense with the “nouveau” than just “gout temps” which means nothing at all. I stress this point.
    With nouveau, I could almost, in some sort of “let’s bastardize French a bit because it sounds exotic!” way, comprehend something, but it’s a whole lotta extrapolation.
    As someone else remarked, it is probably a bastardization of “Good Times”, the execs not knowing the French word for “Good”, which would have given us “Bon Temps Nouveau”. Still horrible on the grammar front, but passable. As someone else noted, “gout” is “taste”. It’s also accompanied by a ^ on the u but that’s neither here nor there (Additionally : New grammar states that the ^ is to be removed entirely from the language! HAHA… fuck you French lit studies.)
    So, going with the “New Good Times” theory, it still doesn’t explain the title – It’s not exactly “good times” as it is likely to be 3 girls discussing trends in life love and romance. I surmise that the proper syntax would be : “Le nouveau goût des temps.” which would be literally “The new tastes in these times” or localized “Today’s new trends.”
    Either way, the show sounds like the equivalent of dual-wielding forks for double the auto-eye-mutilation in order to escape this torment.
    Ultimately, this message serves no purpose in other to say that I recently re-read the entire archives and they still make me laugh even after all these years. I remember still being in High School when discovering I am a Japanese School Teacher (and now Gaijin Smash).

  170. tokusatsu said, on August 18, 2009 at 1:21 pm

    so, any though about japanese tokusatsu and supersentai. i hope you could tell more about these phenomenon to us.

  171. OneCrazyJew said, on August 24, 2009 at 9:53 am

    Simultanious Translation of horrible American Sitcom, like According to Jim, just to prove that despite it’s one of THE WORST RATED shows on air in America, it’s still better than Japanese TV.
    I’d rather get a urethral swab than watch 5 minutes of Japanese TV.

  172. Joe said, on November 7, 2009 at 1:47 pm

    True story: a Japanese friend of mine and I were discussing Japanese TV. I asked her about the shows on your Top 5 (which, mercifully, I have not yet seen).
    Reaction? Something along the lines of, “Those are my favorite shows! And my friends love them too!”

    I’m going to have to agree with your theory that most TV in Japan is designed for women.

  173. Anonymous said, on November 7, 2009 at 1:52 pm

    I have to agree with BenM. I have lived in Japan for just over a year now, and honestly, I have not even turned on my TV once. It helps that my TV is old, small, and crappy, but I still don’t think I would watch any Japanese TV, except possibly in the background while doing something else, to help listening practice.
    (I watch everything on my laptop, and as for video games, I have my DS, or go to my friend’s house to play).
    I download all sorts of American shows, movies, and sports to watch in my free time.

  174. Hekye Matsura said, on November 17, 2009 at 4:54 am

    I ask myself if you hate or love japan.You spent hours writing about that country,so you don’t ignore it,i guess…


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