Gaijin Smash

Japanese People Say The Darndest Things – Version XP

Posted in Blog by gaijinsmashnet on January 8, 2009

I teach business conversational English classes twice a week. Unlike kids or old folks, adults are usually more reserved about what they say, so I rarely hear too many zany, WTF-worthy stuff. …But they do come up with some pretty funny stuff sometimes.
***
One group I teach is a really fun bunch. They seem to get along well outside of work, so in some ways the English class is a chance to unwind and enjoy themselves. Which is a good thing.
For my first class with them, we did self-introductions. After the obligatory boring regular introductions, I had them pick someone – anyone at all – assume the role of that character, and introduce themselves to each other in pairs. They made some interesting character choices – at one point, “Barack Obama” met “Jack Bauer”, and we all agreed that this is a meeting that should happen in real life.
As they are making the rounds, Jack Bauer meets a girl maybe in her mid-thirties/early forties. She’s also kind small/short. For this exercise, she has assumed the identity of Pikachu. As she introduces herself, Jack Bauer is a little surprised by her choice. He steps back, takes a good look at her, and says “Oh, you are Pikachu?! But, you are not yellow. You have no tail.” He even looked at her ass as he said that.
Maybe you have to be very un-PC to appreciate this, but I just found it absolutely hilarious. A Japanese guy sizes up a Japanese woman and then says, “You are not yellow. You have no tail.”
Obviously, Jack Bauer is in the Sir Mix-a-Lot camp when it comes to women.


***
Speaking of “Pikachu”, this woman actually avoids speaking English as much as humanly possible. Weird for an English class, right? Welcome to Japan.
After the introduction exercise concluded, I asked everyone to tell me about someone interesting they met. When it was Pikachu’s turn, she decided to tell me about her meeting about Jack Bauer.
Me: So, where does he work?
Pikachu: I don’t know…maybe some kind of special police?
Me: Okay…maybe we can say he is special police (I’m trying to keep things simple). Did he tell you anything else that was interesting?
Pikachu: (thinks about it for a second) …Not really.
Me: Really? Nothing? Nothing at all?
Pikachu: Yes. Jack Bauer has a very ordinary life.
Me: …Really? So, nothing interesting happens to him, at all, say in one whole day?
Pikachu: (thinks about it again) Oh, his wife died a few years ago. But that’s about it.
International terrorists…nuclear bombs…deadly chemical weapons…the fate of the free world…apparently all of this is just one normal day for Pikachu. Man, the Pokemon world is a lot more cutthroat than I thought.
***
In a different exercise, I had the students pretend to be travel agents and potential travelers. The catch was that the travelers were extremely rich, and wanted to take a vacation where they could spend ridiculous amounts of money. Again, Jack Bauer, the travel agent, was paired up with Barack Obama, the traveler. …These are just my nicknames for them now, I didn’t have them play travel agent as these characters. I can’t imagine the travel package that the real Jack Bauer would put together. “You too can scream in terrorists faces and shoot dangerous criminals, while staying in the fanciest 5-star hotel and enjoying the recreational facilities…”
For his desired vacation, Obama was telling Bauer that he wanted to see the pyramids in Egypt. He asked about travel arrangements through the Egyptian desert, to which Bauer replied, “Oh, we have a special camel. It makes you feel so good.”
…I…don’t think I want to know.
Personally, I would have preferred a tricked-out humvee or something, but hey, who can say no to a special camel that makes you feel so good? Sign me up!
***
In a different class, I was teaching two young female lawyers about how to politely refuse suggestions by saying I’m sorry and giving a reason why you can’t. As a scenario, I pretended to be a guy asking them for a date, so they had to come up with excuses as to why they couldn’t go to the movies or dinner. As an interesting cultural point, I told them that there was one response in particular that American women are famous for giving, and asked them to guess what it was. “Imagine you are an American girl, and I’m an American guy asking you for a date,” I said. “You don’t want to go. What would you say, if you were an American girl?” Trying their best to think like young American women, their responses were –
“I’m sorry, but I like much bigger, stronger guy.” (Keep in mind that I’m 6’3, over 200 pounds…)
“I’m sorry, I can’t. I’m a lesbian.”
…Yeah.
I told them the answer was “I’m going to wash my hair”* and they both agreed that it was a terrible excuse.
*I’ve actually been hit with this excuse. At the time I was young and stupid and accepted it, but seriously, what the hell? I also told this to my wife, who’s response was “Yeah? I wash my hair everyday.”
I then asked the two girls to come up with an excuse of their own. As usual, they kind of stared into space, thinking hard about what they could say. I tried to give them a prompt by coughing – I was aiming for “Sorry, but I have a cold/I’m not feeling well.” However, upon seeing my prompt, one girl said, “Oh! I’m sorry, I can’t. I must go to the hospital.”
Well, I guess that’s one way to let a guy down. “I’m sorry, I can’t go out with you. Your date proposal has made me so intensely, violently ill, that I have to check into the nearest hospital immediately.
I think I like the hair washing excuse better.
***
Let’s go back to Pikachu.
In one exercise, I pretended to be a passenger on the trains, violating some rule or being rude in some way. The student had to ask me to stop or change what I was doing. For Pikachu, I pretended that I was a guy who had cluelessly wandered onto the women’s only train. So, ideally, Pikachu would come up to me and say “Excuse me, but this is a women’s only car. Would you mind moving to the next car?” Ideally.
But remember that Pikachu tries to avoid using English whenever possible. So her solution to the problem was just to get off the train.
I got Pikachu back on the train, and explained that she needed to ride this train to be on time for work. With no escape now, she had to now use English to talk to me. So as a clueless Gaijin male who just happened to mistakenly board the women’s only car, Pikachu, this tiny little Japanese woman, comes up to me, taps me on the shoulder, and says “Get out!”.
I didn’t have to pretend to be surprised. Keeping up the story though, I asked why I was being asked to get off the train. Pikachu thinks about it for a moment, then points to my crotch and says, “You have that. That is not okay on this train. You must get off.”
Well, I guess the “No Penis Car” is one way of saying “Ladies Only Train”. Gentlemen, take your penises to cars 2-8 only.
Not wanting to let her off the hook just yet, I said that the morning train was crowded so I couldn’t change cars internally, and the doors had just closed. I asked her how I could get off this train car? I was hoping to get out of her “Wait until the train stops, and then change cars at the station.” What I did get was, “how about the window?”
I’m telling you guys, Pikachu is hardcore.
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67 Responses

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  1. Advena said, on January 8, 2009 at 12:12 pm

    That is some hardcore piece of Japanese Lady. O_O

  2. Anonymous said, on January 8, 2009 at 1:38 pm

    “But remember that Pikachu tries to avoid using English whenever possible. So her solution to the problem was just to get off the train.”
    *facepalm 1*
    “So as a clueless Gaijin male who just happened to mistakenly board the women’s only car, Pikachu, this tiny little Japanese woman, comes up to me, taps me on the shoulder, and says “Get out!”.”
    *facepalm 2*
    People are hilarious hahaha.

  3. Anonymous said, on January 8, 2009 at 1:38 pm

    “But remember that Pikachu tries to avoid using English whenever possible. So her solution to the problem was just to get off the train.”
    *facepalm 1*
    “So as a clueless Gaijin male who just happened to mistakenly board the women’s only car, Pikachu, this tiny little Japanese woman, comes up to me, taps me on the shoulder, and says “Get out!”.”
    *facepalm 2*
    People are hilarious hahaha.

  4. jazzorion said, on January 8, 2009 at 1:38 pm

    “But remember that Pikachu tries to avoid using English whenever possible. So her solution to the problem was just to get off the train.”
    *facepalm 1*
    “So as a clueless Gaijin male who just happened to mistakenly board the women’s only car, Pikachu, this tiny little Japanese woman, comes up to me, taps me on the shoulder, and says “Get out!”.”
    *facepalm 2*
    People are hilarious hahaha.

  5. ShadowCell said, on January 8, 2009 at 5:34 pm

    Wouldn’t Jack Bauer *work* for Barack Obama now
    (effective January 20th, anyway)?
    He’ll fix the economy by having Jack Bauer beat the shit out of it.
    =D

  6. Crowley said, on January 8, 2009 at 5:46 pm

    I actually LOL’d. Funny funny. Glad to hear work situation is easing a bit. Go Az:)
    What’s happening with your book?

  7. Marcus said, on January 8, 2009 at 5:47 pm

    lmao, I think you got the roles for jack bauer and pikachu reversed!

  8. Francisco said, on January 8, 2009 at 6:49 pm

    lol havent laughed so hard in a long time.
    keep up the good work man.

  9. Shinobu Tsukasa said, on January 8, 2009 at 7:14 pm

    Damn! Pikachu is a beast. It’s a good thing you didn’t push her any further on that — I think her next step would probably have been to knee you in the balls, pry open the door, and kick you out of the moving train.
    Seriously though, they should change the signs for the “Ladies Car” to read 不精巣車。 Hell yeah.

  10. Anonymous said, on January 8, 2009 at 7:33 pm

    “I’m sorry, I can’t. I’m a lesbian.”
    It’s actually used a lot here for guys we don’t know.

  11. Anonymous said, on January 8, 2009 at 7:33 pm

    “I’m sorry, I can’t. I’m a lesbian.”
    It’s actually used a lot here for guys we don’t know.

  12. Anonymous said, on January 8, 2009 at 7:49 pm

    This was hilarious. I’m glad GaijinSmash is being updated constantly now but, what about OP9? Please tell me you haven’t forgotten us OP9 lovers.

  13. Anonymous said, on January 8, 2009 at 7:49 pm

    This was hilarious. I’m glad GaijinSmash is being updated constantly now but, what about OP9? Please tell me you haven’t forgotten us OP9 lovers.

  14. Mel said, on January 8, 2009 at 8:03 pm

    This is great!
    I love it when you do Japanese_____Say the Darndest Thing!
    When you hear these darn statements, how do you react? Do you actually laugh out loud or do you just make a mental note?

  15. Patrick said, on January 8, 2009 at 9:55 pm

    This was a great entry. Thanks for the comedy! Especially the line: “International terrorists…nuclear bombs…deadly chemical weapons…the fate of the free world…apparently all of this is just one normal day for Pikachu. Man, the Pokemon world is a lot more cutthroat than I thought.”

  16. Amber said, on January 9, 2009 at 12:23 am

    OMG. I love Pikachu’s responses to the situations. The refusals were good too. They’re creative, I’ll give them that…

  17. Anonymous said, on January 9, 2009 at 1:23 am

    Lawyer lady was right about the lesbian excuse. It works especially well if one is out with female friends and has one on hand to wrap an arm around or something. Though sadly it does not work on all men. And may attract actual lesbians. (But they’re generally a lot nicer about the whole hitting on you thing then most men are, so there’s really no issue there).

  18. Anonymous said, on January 9, 2009 at 1:23 am

    Lawyer lady was right about the lesbian excuse. It works especially well if one is out with female friends and has one on hand to wrap an arm around or something. Though sadly it does not work on all men. And may attract actual lesbians. (But they’re generally a lot nicer about the whole hitting on you thing then most men are, so there’s really no issue there).

  19. Rodney McTaco said, on January 9, 2009 at 2:39 am

    “Oh, we have a special camel. It makes you feel so good.”
    It took me a second, but that’s a direct translation of a horrible fucking ダジャレ:
    「駱駝(ラクダ)が楽だ(ラクダ)。」
    Ouch. Whoever said that should’ve been escorted from the premises and thoroughly flogged.

  20. code monkey said, on January 9, 2009 at 7:43 am

    I choose you, Pikachu…!
    So I surmise we’ll hear more about Pikachu in the months to come? Maybe you should compile a Hall of Fame of really quirky people you met in Japan.
    Choosing from your teaching days would a tough one, though.

  21. Anonymous said, on January 9, 2009 at 1:37 pm

    Ah, these are awesome!!
    The “I’m washing my hair tonight” excuse doesn’t work anymore. It was used more during ’40s/’50s, I think, when hair dryers weren’t as common and people only washed their hair once a week. Now it’s just a terrible excuse..

  22. Anonymous said, on January 9, 2009 at 1:37 pm

    Ah, these are awesome!!
    The “I’m washing my hair tonight” excuse doesn’t work anymore. It was used more during ’40s/’50s, I think, when hair dryers weren’t as common and people only washed their hair once a week. Now it’s just a terrible excuse..

  23. hanchan said, on January 9, 2009 at 7:26 pm

    i once had a middle aged lady say her 2 children (college aged) ate out each other…
    she meant they ate dinner out separately with friends.
    i didnt touch it. pure omgwtf.

  24. Prodigal Priest said, on January 9, 2009 at 8:30 pm

    Oh man….. XD
    Glad to see the comments are working again, though. Also glad to hear you have work AT ALL, given the economic situation worldwide nowadays.
    Take care.

  25. Anonymous said, on January 10, 2009 at 5:45 am

    Wow, great new entries.
    Do you ever think back and realize that you could have said something like they did in Japanese? I guess by now you’ve got the hang of the nuances, but do you ever wonder if you lay some of these out and no one says anything. I’m not trying to make you paranoid or anything.
    I’d also like to hear your thoughts on your own use of Japanese. Maybe a historical overview up unto this point. You’ve talked about it before but not in detail.
    Thanks for the wonderful entry

  26. Anonymous said, on January 10, 2009 at 5:45 am

    Wow, great new entries.
    Do you ever think back and realize that you could have said something like they did in Japanese? I guess by now you’ve got the hang of the nuances, but do you ever wonder if you lay some of these out and no one says anything. I’m not trying to make you paranoid or anything.
    I’d also like to hear your thoughts on your own use of Japanese. Maybe a historical overview up unto this point. You’ve talked about it before but not in detail.
    Thanks for the wonderful entry

  27. KC said, on January 10, 2009 at 10:10 am

    Don’t forget, you must get off.

  28. Andrew said, on January 10, 2009 at 2:03 pm

    I found out early in high school that you can take a step lower than just getting “I have to wash my hair.” The same night I got that excuse, I decided to go see a movie with explosions and such with a couple friends… and saw the excuse-giver at the same theater. Liar! Your hair hasn’t been washed!

  29. Jenna said, on January 10, 2009 at 4:01 pm

    I think “I’m washing my hair” is a good excuse if you want to be a bitch to the dude. Maybe he’s a douche so you say something like “oh I have to wash my hair tonight” then he says “well what about another night?” and you say “I wash my hair everynight” and then walk away.

  30. commodorejohn said, on January 10, 2009 at 5:50 pm

    To Pikachu’s credit, that’s a completely unambiguous way to get the point across. I mean, what possibility of miscommunication is there in that statement?

  31. K-Prime said, on January 11, 2009 at 2:59 am

    Get out! use the window!
    English teaching has its perks

  32. Kitten said, on January 11, 2009 at 9:40 pm

    These stories always get me laughing. I agree with one commenter jack bauer’s and pikachu’s roles are reversed.
    Can you imagine the episode of Pokemon if Pikachu was ever like that??

  33. Anonymous said, on January 13, 2009 at 4:59 am

    Man, Kansai ladies are hardcore.

  34. Anonymous said, on January 13, 2009 at 4:59 am

    Man, Kansai ladies are hardcore.

  35. Joe said, on January 13, 2009 at 4:13 pm

    So, Obama, Bauer and Pikachu walk into a bar…
    Seriously, though, I wonder how these jokes work from the other side? Do Japanese OLs sit around and talk about the crazy things the resident gaijin said at work / how he did a gaijin smash of someone?
    Or would they be more likely to gossip things like, “I heard that the gaijin once used the WRONG VERB TENSE when muttering to himself at home and sorta-kinda implied a lack of proper respect for our company! Hidoi, ne?”

  36. Anonymous said, on January 13, 2009 at 6:07 pm

    married guy doesn’t talk about their looks(what happend to your older woman fetish!)…..
    funny past couple of entries though

  37. Anonymous said, on January 13, 2009 at 6:07 pm

    married guy doesn’t talk about their looks(what happend to your older woman fetish!)…..
    funny past couple of entries though

  38. Nadrew said, on January 14, 2009 at 3:15 am

    Hey Dude!
    Did you try going to the Shiyakusho? I get my insurance through Shinjuku Ward. It’s not so expensive. Check it out.

  39. Mike said, on January 14, 2009 at 5:46 am

    Dude are you like going to be an English teacher forever? TO each his own but that shit aint for me.
    (Az’s Note: Evening business eikaiwa, I took the job while I still had the last one to make more money to save for the wedding. When I quit the last job it was my only source of income. Now with a new job its a nice suppliment. Teaching professional businessmen and women is a lot better than kids.)

  40. evil_tennyo said, on January 15, 2009 at 9:55 pm

    “Pikachu thinks about it for a moment, then points to my crotch and says, “You have that. That is not okay on this train. You must get off.”
    LMAO!!!!!! So awesome *tear*

  41. Anonymous said, on January 17, 2009 at 4:44 am

    I usually just say “NO” when asked out. If a guy doesn’t like it, tough. Either that, or “Who wants to go out with you????” Pikachu should just offer to cut it off it the guy stays.

  42. Anonymous said, on January 17, 2009 at 4:44 am

    I usually just say “NO” when asked out. If a guy doesn’t like it, tough. Either that, or “Who wants to go out with you????” Pikachu should just offer to cut it off it the guy stays.

  43. Erica said, on January 17, 2009 at 12:48 pm

    As a black woman, I can tell you, “I’m washing my hair” is still a valid excuse, fyi.

  44. saltie said, on January 18, 2009 at 10:23 pm

    “Dude are you like going to be an English teacher forever? To each his own but that shit aint for me.”
    Wow, classic gaijin in Japan cut down. Who do you think you’re fooling with that one?
    Dude are you like going to be an ass forever?
    Come one now, don’t be such a jerk, have some class, and stop gaijin on gaijin crime.

  45. Kev said, on January 19, 2009 at 6:14 pm

    Are there any follow up news of retired actress Ai Iijima that you know of in Japan? I came across the old news today O.o
    (Az’s Note: Interestingly enough, not really. They covered it briefly and then kind of swept it under the rug…)

  46. TJF588 said, on January 20, 2009 at 5:05 am

    So, how many interpretted “You must get off.” in a much maughtier way than our travelled author seems to’ve? It didn’t strike me that way at first, but thinking it over, in an article titled like this, well…
    THIS NO TRAIN OF THE ERECTION

  47. TJF588 said, on January 20, 2009 at 5:07 am

    Actually, it’s dissing the stress-to-paycheck ratio associated with teaching professions. I think.
    So, how many interpretted “You must get off.” in a much maughtier way than our travelled author seems to’ve? It didn’t strike me that way at first, but thinking it over, in an article titled like this, well…
    THIS TRAIN IS NOT FOR THE LACKING OF ERECTION

  48. Mike said, on January 20, 2009 at 11:32 pm

    “Dude are you like going to be an English teacher forever? To each his own but that shit aint for me.”
    Wow, classic gaijin in Japan cut down. Who do you think you’re fooling with that one?
    Dude are you like going to be an ass forever?
    Come one now, don’t be such a jerk, have some class, and stop gaijin on gaijin crime.
    Posted by: saltie at January 18, 2009 10:23 PM
    Who do I think Im fooling? Not myself, thats for sure! I been here over 14 years and I can tell you English teaching is not a career. You tell me, wise one, how can you transfer English teaching skills anywhere? And the thing about is, the longer you do it, the more time you loose. Now Im sure you want me to join along in Azzs goofy fascination with Japan, but Im long past that phase, thats for somebody fresh off the plane. The position “English Teacher” is not really even a position because your not teaching anything. Most Japanese already got the grammar part down and dont care to learn it. They just want the opportunity to speak English with somebody. The whole thing is a big scam, run by those way up on top of the mountain in Japan. This is part of their Confucious oriented culture, to have unquestionable obedience to anybody with authority.

  49. Excel-2009 said, on January 21, 2009 at 1:41 am

    I read the whole post in my mind as Jack Bauer would dictate. I think every post should be read this way.

  50. saltie said, on January 23, 2009 at 6:11 am

    Saying to a friend “Dude are you like gonna be a bartender for the rest of your life?” is gonna get you a swift punch in the face for reasons I need not illustrate.
    I wasn’t defending or judging any line of work. You seem to be the one with the opinions on teaching, not me. I do though have opinions on ex-English teachers who think they’re of a different ilk now that they’re salary men selling insurance or some other line of ‘high-skill’ sales, I mean work. But I’ll keep those opinions to myself for now.
    Really, I was just trying to call someone out on their thinly-veiled smug condescension…but hey this is the Internet. It’s all about porn, assholery, and most importantly, passing judgment.
    Silly me, how could I forget the Greater Internet Fuckwad Theory.

  51. Kev said, on January 23, 2009 at 6:29 pm

    Hey you don’t have to post this one if you don’t want to (lessens the competition!), but do check it out. I’ve been a long time fan, you’ve seen my posts and recieved minor donations (which i hope has helped a bit :))
    But today I found another opportunity for you. Trust me I’m not so generous, if I had the qualifications like you and already lived in Japan, I’d apply myself Hahaha. But I do believe you are qualified for these two positions posted by the Canadian Consulate in Japan (Nothing says you have to be a Canadian Citizen). Do check it out, translator and advisor position. Let me know how it is, good luck if you try to apply~
    Here’s the link:
    http://www.canadanet.or.jp/offices/recruitment.shtml

  52. mike61732002 said, on January 24, 2009 at 3:34 am

    Hey Az, long time reader but first time commenter here 🙂 Just wanted to say keep up the great blog posts! This site is one of my daily-visits, and makes me laugh every time! When I have more money, I will definately be donating 🙂

  53. JackieChan said, on January 24, 2009 at 11:36 pm

    Hey AZ, why are you waiting so long to drop these wedding pictures? I see that you have them on your photobucket (no homo @ me knowing your personal photobucket)

  54. AJ* said, on January 27, 2009 at 5:19 pm

    やっほ AZ先生、 このBLOGが すうげ!大好きですよ。 すうごい 笑い! えと。。。私のじしょが当為。。。 今日は頭の休み だから 今から 英語で。。。 Well, Az, I’m kinda new up here, but I have now read every post ^.^v It’s funny how much we have in common, although despite being a girl, i totaly out-geek you :p. (BTW, the table-top 40K utterly beats playstaion, all the way) Although my jap experience was the opposite of your early years(I was a 高校二年性 at an all-girls school in Kyushu, and a blonde, tiny little white australian. You’ve brought back so many memories, and made me nastalgic, not to mention actually considering JET after uni. Which is deffinatly saying something, after all the crap that happened while i was there (such as getting kicked out by my host mother and generally being treated like shit). But I do have so many funny tales if you ever feel like trading war stories :p Oh, and if it makes you feel any better, it’s not just male JHS JETs that get felt up in schools… there was multiple occasions when the school girls suddenly decided it would be okay to feel my boobs(which were MUCH superiour to their own :p) >_< ahhh… those immature, not so innocent, girls…
    Oh, and the writing thing- what style/genre are you interested in writing? I could see you doing a collection of essays type book, or a kooky sci-fi (hmm, which sci-fi isnt kooky? :p) but obviously I only know you from your blogging. BTW, I have some experience in editing/proofreading for amatures, so feel free to drop me a line. ^_^
    o.O crap I wrote alot… well, cut me some slack… I’ve been wanting to write a comment for ages, but I held off until I’d caught up…
    So, I’ll hold back from ranting about how wrong the Game On article was about girls (violent video games were designed for girls on PMS) and well, I’ll shut up now. どうぞよろしく、AZ. 元気でね。 .^_^.v 

  55. Seraph said, on January 30, 2009 at 8:43 am

    Maybe you should bring in “24” on DVD for the class to watch in English, Pikachu will then know the error of her ways; that and you’ll basically be getting paid to watch 24.
    So your wife’s comment that she “washes her hair everyday,” would make it appear as though she refuses date offers everyday, but that’s just me.
    Also, I would hope your saving water (and Yen) by showering together.

  56. Shik said, on January 30, 2009 at 1:13 pm

    Az, I hate to break it to you…but Jack Bauer simply is not all that people make him out to be. In fact, he’s pretty much a big whiny pussy. The superior gent is of course, John McClane.

  57. irishdncr83 said, on January 31, 2009 at 8:52 pm

    I’ve actually used the “I have to wash my hair” excuse, except I really did want to go out with the guy, and it was all due to the fact that I had a serious amount of hair spray in my hair. So, we went out the next night. But I felt horrible for having to say that…

  58. Lyn said, on February 1, 2009 at 3:56 pm

    Actually, as a black woman I can honestly say that washing my hair and such (like drying it, styling it) takes about 3 hours, minimum.
    I don’t use that as an excuse to turn guys down. In the case of this guy who asked me out in high school, my response was, “I’d rather die,” and I honestly meant it (said guy now goes to college with me, I can’t get rid of him)
    When do we get to see the wedding pictures? *puppy eyes*

  59. Chris said, on February 2, 2009 at 4:28 pm

    God, I miss Japan. The stuff you say is some of the truest shit ever. It makes me LOL as I sit here doing my homework back in cold Wisconsin. I think if I called or emailed my host mother that there’s been snow on the ground for 3 months now, she wouldn’t believe. She was kind enough to send me a box with Japanese packaged ramen because I sent her some maple syrup as a Christmas present. I sent her a 32 oz. bottle of maple syrup, because that stuff is like crack to her.

  60. Maethelwine said, on February 2, 2009 at 11:54 pm

    Hey Az, I hope you keep the posts coming. I just wanted to let you know I’ve mentioned your blog on Japan in Motion’s Blogs on Japan site. Take a look if you like, or just give us some more posts. Thanks!

  61. fedex-chan said, on February 9, 2009 at 12:02 am

    I Rofl’d. Seriously, I’m sitting on my bed using a laptop and I started rolling around laughing at one point. Good stuff is always real like this!

  62. KREEPYKRAWLLY said, on February 12, 2009 at 5:50 am

    I never knew 🙂

  63. Ink said, on April 3, 2009 at 7:18 am

    Omg! I remember reading your blog AGES ago, when the layout wasn’t as spiffy as this. I remember reading all of your posts and laughing hard to myself. I lost the url when I changed computers, so I was pretty sad for a while. Yay for re-finding you again!
    /end stalker-y comment. XDD

  64. Ink said, on April 3, 2009 at 8:22 pm

    Omg! I remember reading your blog AGES ago, when the layout wasn’t as spiffy as this. I remember reading all of your posts and laughing hard to myself. I lost the url when I changed computers, so I was pretty sad for a while. Yay for re-finding you again!
    /end stalker-y comment. XDD

  65. Anonymous said, on April 6, 2009 at 1:04 am

    Jack Bauer doesn’t have much right to get onto pikachu for not being yellow or having a tail. pikachu should have retorted by pointing out that JB wasn’t white and probably wasn’t tall or buff either.

  66. Anonymous said, on April 6, 2009 at 1:04 am

    Jack Bauer doesn’t have much right to get onto pikachu for not being yellow or having a tail. pikachu should have retorted by pointing out that JB wasn’t white and probably wasn’t tall or buff either.

  67. Gertie said, on April 8, 2009 at 5:55 pm

    Hey now watch that dissing the pikachu. You are probably looking at the woman who will in the future prevent the use of the air conditioner at some other teacher office. xS


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