Gaijin Smash

Proposal Preparations

Posted in Blog by gaijinsmashnet on December 6, 2007

I suppose since I’ve sort of involved you all in the process, I might as well keep you updated on the situation. That, and with this pretty much taking control of 95% of my active thought process, I can’t really think about much else, let alone write an entry that would be worth reading.
So, as you all may know, I’m planning on proposing to my current girlfriend this Christmas. We’ve had some ups and downs, but she’s a really good girl who truly loves me. That, and she has yet to innovate any oral sex maneuvers based on sea creatures, so I figure I’m safe. Everyone who meets her says they really like her as well, so I’m trying to use that as a gauge. Everyone who met the infamous ex, absolutely hated her. Even people who only talked to her for like 30 seconds. Which makes me think that she has a nasty pair of devil horns or an aura of Pure Evil or something that only I was oblivious to. How’d that happen, anyway?
Az’s Heart: Hmm, something’s wrong.
Az’s Anxiety: Hmm, something’s wrong.
Az’s Brain: Hmm, something’s wrong.
Az’s Penis: Mmm, sweet Japanese tail.
Az’s Brain: Hey, are you paying attention down there?
Az’s Penis: Nope, and now, neither are you. ULTIMATE VETO POWER, ACTIVATE!
Az’s Brain: …Mmm, sweet Japanese tail.
Anyway, current girlfriend. Proposal. First step was the ring. And before anything else, a GIANT thank you to all donators who pitched in anything at all, to help me buy a ring. Your contributions are very greatly appreciated. Ideally, I’d like to send a thank you email or something to all who donated – realistically, I don’t have that kind of time. I’ll try, but I can’t make any promises. Just know that it’s very, very, very much appreciated.
So, back to the ring. We headed out to downtown Kyoto one day to do some shopping. I managed to negotiate some time away from her – one hour. One hour to decide on an engagement ring isn’t a whole lot of time, so I had to act quickly. I headed to one of the high-class department stores right off the bat. I found one corner with some really nice, expensive rings. My girlfriend likes simple, and I felt that these rings were simple, yet elegant.
Now, usually when you’re casually looking at rings, the sales ladies will be falling over themselves to rush over to you and try to convince you to buy one before the price tag scares you off. I of course, am still big Gaijin in Japan, so the ladies just kind of sideways-eyeballed me wondering what I could possibly want with their jewelry. I finally asked one lady (who looked like a living, breathing, Japanese barbie doll caked in makeup) about the diamond content of one of the rings.
Me: So are these pure-cut diamonds?
Her: Yes, they are. …Japanese OK?
Me: Yes, Japanese OK.
Her: Oh! Ah, I see. What kind of ring are you interested in?
Me: Well, I’m looking for an engagement ring.
Her: Oh! An engagement ring! …For your girlfriend?
Me: Yes, that’s usually who would receive an engagement ring…
Her: …Is she Japanese?
Me: …No, she’s a gorilla.* Yes, she’s Japanese.
*The truth is out – I’m going to propose to Misty. I must make that hot monkey lovin mine for the rest of my life.

The lady does show me some nice rings, albeit expensive. There was one I really liked, and I wanted to buy it on the spot. However, I wasn’t sure of my girlfriend’s ring size, and according to Barbie Doll-san, a mistake in the size can be catastrophic. We both decided it would be best for me to confirm the size before buying. Barbie-san suggested I sneak away my girlfriend’s current ring and bring it in for an actual sizing. She might as well have asked me to steal the nuclear football out of the White House. I think that would be easier actually.
So I went to a different store called The Loft. I’ve bought some jewelry from them before, and they’re usually pretty good about helping me determine the size. I was looking at rings when a young girl came over my way and asked if I needed any help – in English! I’m long past the point of feeling like I have something to prove in Japanese, so I explained my situation to her in English. She speculated that my girlfriend’s size would be a 9, and even showed me a popular line of rings that she thought my girlfriend might like. The rings were nice, but not nearly as expensive. While that makes my pocketbook very happy, I sort of figured that for something as large as a proposal, I needed to not be stingy. My hour was beginning to run out, so I told the girl I’d have to go, but I would give the matter more consideration. As I was about to leave, she said “Wow, your girlfriend is really lucky. If things don’t work out with her, come find me, okay?” …Wow.
And what is up with that, anyway? When I’m dating, women are literally throwing themselves at me, but when I’m single my dating life as about as active and exciting as a senior citizen’s game of shuffleboard. Delayed by rain. Ladies, do you have any sort of explanation for why this is?
I meet up with my girl, and ideally, we’d go home and I would play video games or we could have sex for hours on end or someone would just deliver a well-done steak with all the trimmings right to my doorstep. But as you all know by now…my life just doesn’t roll like that.
Girl: Do you mind if we do a little more shopping.
Me: *heavy sigh* I suppose not. Where do you want to go?
Girl: I really want to go to The Loft.
Me: (internally) ….FUCK!
Me: (spoken) ….Okay…let’s go…to…The Loft.
Girl: …You okay there?
Me: Yeah. Just thinking about coincidence and cursing God – you know how I do.
So naturally, I’m a little worried. She wants to go to the place where I was just sizing up engagement rings. We entered, and the friendly store clerk from before spots me. She begins to wave and come over, but then she sees girl attached to my arm, and stops. Thank you, store clerk! Girlfriend is looking at various things in the store, naturally eventually landing on the rings. “You really like rings, huh?” I say casually. “Of course I do, I’m a girl! I always want a ring.” She says. I think this is an *excellent* opportunity to figure out her size, and as I’m trying to discreetly hand her random rings to try on, the English-speaking store clerk comes over…with a finger sizing guide! I LOVE this woman! We confirm that her size is indeed a 9, and then the clerk as a part of her usual sales routine, shows my girlfriend the same line she’d showed me earlier. The girlfriend loved them (I’d thought they were a bit too cheap…). So not only did I get a size confirmation, I also got a style and price range as well. This store clerk is awesome. When the girlfriend wasn’t looking, I gave her a smile and a wink, and mouthed the words “if things don’t work out, you are next on the list sweetie.” Okay, I didn’t actually do that, but I was thinking it, and hopefully she was tuned in to my brain wave patterns or something and got the message.
With girlfriend now on a substantial ring kick, its easy enough to go back to the first department store to look at rings there. I show her the very expensive rings I was looking at earlier – girlfriend isn’t interested. Well, I just dodged a very expensive bullet there, didn’t I? Barbie-san is still there, and she recognizes me of course, but also recognizes girlfriend, and smartly doesn’t do anything to give away my plans. Girlfriend ends up finding her ideal ring in a different part of the store – the one ring to rule them all. The size was even a perfect fit! She put the ring back, chalking it up to “maybe one day”, but unknown to her I doubled back later and bought it. And made sure to throw it into hot flames before hiding it, and make sure that no Elvish writing appeared on the band. …You never can be too sure.
So ring…check.
The next step was parental consent. Various people had told me that I did or did not need to clear my intentions with the parents beforehand, but I had decided that it was something I wanted to do. The timing actually worked out kind of well. As I was thinking of contacting the mother, my girlfriend picked a fight with me because I was breathing in a manner she didn’t approve of (this was while she was PMS’ing, or as I like to call it, “Devil Trigger Bitch From Hell Week”). She called her Mom to complain about my offensive breathing habits, and the Mom told her to shove it and apologize to me. The Mom then sends me an email apologizing for her daughter and asking me to please hang in there. I mailed back and mentioned that there was something I wanted to talk about, would it be okay to meet up with her privately. We set a time to meet one Saturday evening.
The Mom gave me some useful advice for dealing with the difficult part of her daughter’s personality, especially the Devil Trigger Bitch From Hell Week (“…Run. Run fast, run far, don’t look back…”). After some build-up and properly psyching myself up, I told her my intention to propose on Christmas and asked if that would be okay. The Mom cried and said of course it was okay, that I was already more or less a part of the family. She also said she was insanely jealous of her own daughter for having found a guy like me.
Though perhaps dying remnants of a fading generation, there are still parents who are hesitant, or flat-out opposed, to letting their daughters marry foreigners. I’m sure prejudice and xenophobia play some part in that. But another somewhat valid concern is that we foreigners don’t tend to stay in Japan indefinitely, we do go back to our home countries at some point, and usually take our girlfriends/wives with us. The family is perhaps concerned about their daughter going overseas to a country she may not be familiar with to stake a new life with some guy who may or may not even speak her language. Things will be difficult for her regardless of how well the relationship works, and if it doesn’t work out (which does happen) then she can be stuck in a foreign land very far away from home.
Now, I’ve never ever felt that the Mom didn’t approve of our relationship in any way (she told my girlfriend when we first started dating “as long as he makes you happy, I don’t care where he’s from”) but it was good to officially make my intentions known and be sure that it was okay with her. So, parental consent: check.
The only thing left now is convincing myself.
Practically, I know there’s no reason not to. I believe we can spend the rest of our lives together, create a happy family together, and all that mushy gooey nonsense. It’s just a matter of fighting off those doubts and hesitations in the back of one’s mind. The “M” word is a very, very big one. I don’t particularly want to get divorced, so this is something I only want to do once in my life. I have to decide very, very carefully. Of course, the usual guy insecurities factor in as well…
Az’s Heart: She’s a wonderful girl, and we love her very much.
Az’s Brain: She does offer a lot, and I don’t think that we could find better even if we tried.
Az’s Anxiety: I dunno…marriage is a big thing…but she is a nice girl…
Az’s Penis: Wait a minute, hold the phone here. Stop the presses.
Az’s Heart: What’s wrong?
Az’s Penis: Okay, so if we do this marriage thing right…you all do realize that we can never have sex with another woman ever again, right?
Az’s Brain: Hmm. Hadn’t thought of that.
Az’s Penis: So, what am I supposed to do? Be content with the same meal over and over for the rest of my life? What happened to going out and trying new things?
Az’s Heart: New is fun, but it has no depth. New girls don’t bother to remember who our favorite Decepticon is or spend months tending to us while we had a broken collarbone without ever complaining even once.
Az’s Penis: C’mon guys! Remember that dream we had of experiencing a girl from every country? A threesome? A girl with huge tittays?
Az’s Brain: That’s not really realistic…
Az’s Penis: Sure it is! All we have to do is go out there and get it!
Az’s Heart: And lose something wonderful in the process, yeah.
Az’s Penis: Not to mention the statistic of sex frequency plummeting after marriage…especially in Japan.
Az’s Brain: Well, we are getting older…we can’t act like a vigorous 17-year old anymore.
Az’s Heart: Who needs to have all that sex anyway?
Az’s Anxiety: I’m tired from work and just want to drink a beer and watch some TV.
Az’s Penis: Oh my God…you guys are turning Japanese!
Az’s Anxiety: Are not!
Az’s Penis: Are too! Fine, you wanna play that game, I can be Japanese too…
All: …NO!!!
Az’s Heart: C’mon, it’s not that bad.
Az’s Brain: Yeah. At least we still have pr0n.
So, the countdown is on. Christmas is a little over two weeks away. I’ve made up my mind….more or less. I don’t know if the anxiety or nagging little doubts will ever go away, but I do know what I want to do. It’s just a matter of doing it, is all.
I look back on my time in Japan, and it kind of amazes me. I’ve gone from dancing around 12-year old boys, trying not to get grabbed or poked in the ass, to psyching myself up for a marriage proposal. And all in within a 5 year timespan. Does life move this quickly/extremely for anyone else, or is it just me?
Okay, that’s enough of the introspective LiveJournal nonsense for one day. Next time I’ll have something more interesting to write about. Like, the Yakuza. Or, porn vending machines. Or, rabid child molesters with knives riding lions. Whatever should happen to come my way.


118 Responses

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  1. deagle said, on December 6, 2007 at 6:00 am

    First comment!
    I just want to say that I have been a fan since outpostnine, and I want to congratulate you for your decision, and I wish you all the best.
    Whatever happens, good or bad, do know that here is a fan from another side of the globe that will always pray for you.

  2. ItAintEazy said, on December 6, 2007 at 6:01 am

    Wow, I’m so glad for you, and I hope it all goes well. If I met a girl who took care of me without complaint while I was immobilized with a collarbone injury, I’d try my damned best not to let her go. You can’t even find family members like that nowadays. From one kokujin to another, I’m glad some good has come out of your staying in Japan (jk).
    Now why does a guy seem more attractive to women when they are dating rather than single? Well for one, there is the commitment factor, and two is the fact that you are actually dateable. If you are single, you have to get over the perception that you are too much of a loser to have a girlfriend. It’s a cruel but understandable truth.

  3. hispter said, on December 6, 2007 at 6:34 am

    Psssh..almost spewed out my drink when i read “gorilla”. That was unexpected for sure. πŸ˜€
    Anyways i’m so happy for you, as i’m sure many other readers are. Good luck Az!

  4. Spooky Electric said, on December 6, 2007 at 6:36 am

    Wow, how exciting! and scary.
    You’re absofuckinglutely right about the girls being more available when you’re taken thing, too. 😐
    It’s great to read that things are going well for you, too.

  5. CF said, on December 6, 2007 at 6:38 am

    I hope when she stuck out her finger to try the
    ring, you didn’t have flashbacks…. πŸ™‚

  6. James said, on December 6, 2007 at 7:03 am

    Hey Az, I wish you the best of the luck for the future, i would love to donate to you a large sum of money but since you haven’t replied to my emails about meeting you… =\
    I will be in japan shortly.
    Anyways all the best with the Proposal, good luck buddy, you will need it! =D

  7. Gegnar said, on December 6, 2007 at 7:06 am

    hey az, i’ve been reading your work since way back in the day when it was on outpostnine.
    and i’m really impressed that you have been able to keep up the posting for so long. both in how frequent the entires came and the good quality of them
    so keep up the good work!

  8. JH from Finland said, on December 6, 2007 at 7:07 am

    Meh, another one bites the dust. Never understood why people truly in love would need or want the confinement of marriage, but I guess I won’t go into that today, as it doesn’t sound like Az’s Anxiety needs any more ammo. Whatever floats your boat, mang. πŸ˜›

  9. Belthasar2 said, on December 6, 2007 at 7:30 am

    Well, also the best wishes and all the luck
    of the world to you, from the Austrian Guy.
    To think that the man who wrote the “Death of a nice guy” and “Why” editorials finally found The One and is going to get married is really great.
    Maybe this is a proof for Karma: For all the thinks you had to endure you’re finally getting compensation. And with your Karma, you probably live a happy life with her for the rest of your life (I certainly wish you that).
    And yes, it really moves that quickly, don’t get me started on that … where has the time gone too. *sigh*
    Now psyche yourself up to Super High Tension State and ask the question!

  10. Beaker said, on December 6, 2007 at 7:53 am

    According to my husband, the whole being attractive when dating vs single really happens. Oh, and being married makes you even more attractive.
    Tell your penis that married girls try to keep their husbands very very happy in bed; it makes them easier to manipulate, I mean, live with. πŸ™‚

  11. Steven said, on December 6, 2007 at 8:33 am

    Huge fan of your posts here Az, I really wish you a good life with your future wife. I think its wonderful that you can find someone you can share your life with

  12. E said, on December 6, 2007 at 8:35 am

    Good luck. You… really don’t sound all that sure, though. I hope you’re making the right decision :-/

  13. sabatoa said, on December 6, 2007 at 9:57 am

    Funny you mentioned LiveJournal since that’s where I read your feeds.
    Good luck and premptive congrats.

  14. Wakka said, on December 6, 2007 at 10:01 am

    I’m sorry not to have been one of those who contributed for your ring, but being out of a job and with currently less money than a Bill Clinton after passing a viagra store, I couldn’t help ya.
    Honestly, it takes “cohones” to take a big step like that. What if:
    – she turns out to be psychotic and this is all a facade.
    – she’s secretly cheating on you?
    – she becomes a totally different person after marriage
    – after having you, she figures there’s no more interest in that nasty sex business
    – she’s a transsexual named Bubba
    – she has a chicken fetish
    – she just wants you for your money
    – she spends her time kancho’ing ya afterwards
    – she’s an alien
    – she’s an ax murderer (popular there, I see)
    these are the things I’d worry about. Still, cohones. And as a reader ever since you hide onlye a handfull of posts on outpost nine, thank you for all that entertainment.
    May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

  15. Kim said, on December 6, 2007 at 10:02 am

    Congratulations! Life does indeed move fast. Three years ago, I was just out of college with zero job prospects and living with my parents. Today I’m engaged, living with my fiance, and have a real job. We’re getting married in September. ^.^ We’re also looking to buy a new house. … There’s a lot going on. But so long as you keep your wits about you, you can keep moving forward.

  16. Jake said, on December 6, 2007 at 10:26 am

    While only having stumbled upon your site in the last month or so, I’ve found it to be hilarious, charming and charming. I wish you all the best.

  17. Curtis Cage said, on December 6, 2007 at 10:36 am

    Yo Az.. I only donated 20 bux .. but if it helped I’m glad bro!
    Yes single women want us involved men!
    To them it’s a sisterhood of the penis.
    If 1 sister thinks thats good penis, alot of the others want to try it out too.
    Yo Az, check it dawg.. remember how you said “who’s going after spanish chicks now? I sense alot of untapped potential”.
    I took your advice. I’m now dating this sexy Brazilian chick, a real portuguese mami if you know what I sayin .. and since then I’ve been getting noticed more.
    Same shit as you G. Up in the store and I’m looking for stuff for her and wouldn’t ya know it.. a store clerk is puttin her hands all over me and getting fresh and saying shit like “if I was your woman, I’d like you to get me this”.
    women are wired weird, so take my advice .. don’t stray! those women that chase other womens men ain’t worth the time!
    But yo dawg.. keep this shit coming!
    Curtis Cage(d) Penguin
    Loyal Reader since Feb 06 πŸ™‚

  18. Ry said, on December 6, 2007 at 10:42 am

    I got married to a wonderful woman out of college. We’ve been married for seven years.
    My penis tries to talk me into big breasts and threeways on a daily basis. The nice part of being married for seven years is when I bring it up to my it doesn’t cause a fight, I just get laughed at before she goes back to whatever she was doing.
    It never goes away, but congratulations anyway!

  19. Ihmhi said, on December 6, 2007 at 10:47 am

    Congratulations Az! I would write it in Japanese, but I am fearful that I might accidentally call you something terrible. ^.^’

  20. Shik said, on December 6, 2007 at 11:14 am

    There’s always being poly, duder. She might dig it.
    As long as you keep in mind the Coolidge effect & work against it, things shouldn’t end up like Shogun.

  21. Quoc said, on December 6, 2007 at 11:27 am

    I’ve been reading these editorials for a few years, and I’m amazed at this. Five years and you’re about to take the dive. I wish you luck and hope it goes well. You have people all around the world rooting for you.

  22. Anonymous said, on December 6, 2007 at 11:29 am

    Go for it Az! May the Force Be With You!

  23. Anonymous said, on December 6, 2007 at 11:29 am

    Go for it Az! May the Force Be With You!

  24. ruisu said, on December 6, 2007 at 11:42 am

    Hey AZ, hey AZ, her mom sounds really cool. You should add that to your plus list. I’m looking forward to your post-xmas blog!
    BTW, something you said a while ago has really been bothering me. When you say that Japanese TV is the most terrible thing ever invented, are you talking about the doramas? Somehow doramas have become the only TV I’ll watch now, it’s been like that for a few months. But now, every time I pop on a show, I have my mental manifestation of AZ in front of your banner’s backdrop, laughing at me. You weren’t talking about the doramas, were you?!

  25. Lissou said, on December 6, 2007 at 12:16 pm

    I’m so excited for you! I can’t wait to hear more.
    And don’t worry, contrarily to popular belief, married men have sex more often than unmarried men the same age. (Probably because “I’ve got a headache” doesn’t beat having no sex for two years because you don’t even have a girlfriend).
    Plus, maybe you won’t have sex with any other woman again, but, well, you can’t say you’d been having sex with 5 women a night before, right? And you love her, so…
    What I mean is, I’m very happy for both of you. And that employee’s good.

  26. Aaron said, on December 6, 2007 at 1:42 pm

    While I hear your doubts, it sounds like even through them you’re convincing yourself. And if it’s as good as you say, then she already sounds worth it. So my two cents (though unasked): Go for it! Life is short.
    …but, if you want to maybe move your fears along, have “the talk.” Because marriage is a two way street. It takes BOTH people together to make it work, one person can’t do it alone if the other is unwilling to try. Just kind of both agree that if you go into this, you both make it work.
    And now that I’m through with my AM Morning Talk Show spiel, my reply to your question about girls is: you’ve said it yourself in your OP9 editorials! They want what they can’t have! And they have a natural radar for it! I’ve seen it in action. lol
    Good luck, Az, and don’t be afraid to go for it. You deserve some happiness in your life.

  27. Gino said, on December 6, 2007 at 1:47 pm


  28. Tone said, on December 6, 2007 at 2:03 pm

    Wedding ceremonies should not be just about the women. I want you to represent us well and muscle your way into the planning. Then I want you to sneak some manly things into it.
    for example:
    1. All candles must shoot 6 inch flames.
    2. The bridesmaids and groomsmen must pop, lock, and break down the aisle ala
    3. If they insist on “Here Comes the Bride”, you insist on “Highway to Hell”, or any song of equivalent or greater manliness. I suggest you stick to songs of either the rock/funk/rap variety…but that’s my personal taste…
    4. All vows come with shredding rock guitar backup:
    “…I do swear to love *srrrraaawwww*, honor *swwwiddaw*, and obey *plays scale*”
    5. Lace and flowers are acceptable
    …don’t look at me that way…
    6. lazer or chainsaw cuts cake.

  29. Randy Rice said, on December 6, 2007 at 2:31 pm

    I wish you all the best.
    I just donated a bit (perhaps some others will read this and realize that it is still not to late).
    Anyway, I look forward to photos of (and stories about) your children.

  30. NM said, on December 6, 2007 at 2:40 pm

    Az: So, parental consent: check.
    The only thing left now is convincing myself.
    You were considering telling her mom you were going to propose and not going through with it? That obasan would have it out for you for years.
    Ever had a woman kick you in the nuts? Repeatedly? Not fun

  31. Justanothermom said, on December 6, 2007 at 3:38 pm

    Congratulations, Az! I’m happy you’ve found the woman to be with for the rest of your life. If I remember right, this is the same girl that you were riding with on the bus right after your first date, when your students saw you? Didn’t one of the girl students say something about you marrying this girl? Kind of prophetic, in a weird yet cool sort of way, huh?
    Don’t listen to all the folks adding their own anxiety factors; the “nagging doubts” are normal for anyone who hasn’t taken the plunge yet. But, if any of them seem to get stronger as you get closer to your nuptials, seek premarital counseling, if they have that in Japan, to be sure you’ve got those issues taken care of before you walk down the aisle (the sessions usually take about 6 to 8 weeks, depending on the counselor). Heck, seek it out anyway, so that you have a little wisdom under your belt from someone who’s seen dozens of couples take the plunge.
    From what you tell of how things worked out for the ring & Mom’s blessings, I think God may have opened all the doors for you because this is the right girl; if it wasn’t, you might still be wondering if you had even seen the right ring for her, and not had one in hand yet.
    You probably have a great romantic idea for how you will pop the question, but if you haven’t thought about it, let me make a suggestion: My husband proposed by telling me a fairy tale which ends with the “prince” eating a meal with his “maiden,” then taking the maiden’s hands (at which point he took hold of mine), he asks “(Name), will you marry me?” Even now, when I tell people the story, the women get jealous & the guys call my husband dawg. You’ve probably got the perfect way to ask already in mind, but if not, this suggestion just might fuel those creative juices (and you can use this, if this sounds like a good idea to you).
    Let us know when you set the date, and be sure to add a link to your gift registry & paypall to all your stories from that point, up until your last story before the big day. That way, we who have been in on your thought process up on this subject, can also sort of attend the ceremony, in a giftie sort of way!
    But, I’m not one of those girls who gets excited about weddings, or anything. πŸ˜‰

  32. Kaitou1412 said, on December 6, 2007 at 3:52 pm

    Way to go Az!
    I’m happy when you’re happy =)
    Keep us updated.

  33. Framed said, on December 6, 2007 at 4:01 pm

    Good luck with your proposal!
    Even though I don’t know you, I wish you the best.

  34. Natalie said, on December 6, 2007 at 4:05 pm

    Hello Az!!! I wish you the best of luck. We’re all cheering for you!

  35. Gomez said, on December 6, 2007 at 4:43 pm

    Good luck with the proposal man. She sounds like a really wonderful girl even with the Devil Trigger Bitch From Hell so count your blessings and stay strong. I’m glad if I helped in anyway and remember if your eye starts to wander there is a good chance that the place it’s wandering to is one that is a place where STDs flourish, it is Japan after all…
    As for a thank you I’d be happy with a “Happy Birthday” since I just turned 26 yesterday and so far the only present I got was a 16 hour work day…
    (Az’s Note: Happy Birthday!
    Don’t worry about not doing anything special. I didn’t really do anything big for my 26th either. I guess that’s just a sign of getting old, eh? πŸ˜₯

  36. Anonymous said, on December 6, 2007 at 5:15 pm

    go get her, tiger!

  37. Anonymous said, on December 6, 2007 at 5:15 pm

    go get her, tiger!

  38. Amanda said, on December 6, 2007 at 6:09 pm

    That. Is adorable. I’m incredibly happy for you. There better be wedding pictures! Hey – does your girlfriend even know you have this blog up? I remember reading that she didn’t…
    But! I’m so happy. I’m sitting in my mythology class with a huge smile on my face for you.
    And maybe I have an answer for that…single vs taken question…
    If a guy is single – there’s something wrong with him. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be single. If he’s a good guy – why isn’t he taken?
    Us chicks have gone through a lot of, meeting a great guy but finding out they’re already taken, situations to know this.
    So…if a guy we meet is taken and has been long enough to want to propose to his girlfriend…he’s gotta be a great guy for her to be with him long enough to want to propose.
    Make sense?

  39. Shinkada said, on December 6, 2007 at 6:11 pm

    Well, 5 years is a long time to me. I dunno if it always will be but it sure as hell is now (I’m still only 18, yeesh). It sounds like a pretty normal occurance of events to happen over 5 years, but then, I’ve never been the type to settle long. I’ve never held a job for more than a month, never stayed in the same school for more than 2 years, never had the same girl for more than 2 months, etc. So maybe it’s just me, but that all sounds pretty normal. =P
    ANYWAY. Congrats on the marriage, Az. I’m sure weeaboos around the planet are, as we speak, an heroing that a large black man should secure yet another one of the precious few Japanese girls who actually have an interest in foreigners.

    Good job.

  40. Anonymous said, on December 6, 2007 at 6:19 pm

    On a completely unrelated note, I don’t know how the legendary “No Hands Jack” feels like. =[

  41. Kerii-tan said, on December 6, 2007 at 6:28 pm

    Uwaaaah, congratulations! ^^ I sincerely hope she says yes, good luck! ^^
    And as for why women seem much more availible when you’re dating someone, here it is coming from a female. Could be one of two reasons: A, natural human desire is to want what someone else has, so they want a man more when he’s already taken. And B, they see a man who’s dedicated to his girlfriend and are jealous of that, but if they were to see a single guy, there’s that subconscious thought of “he must not have a girlfriend because he’s not that great a guy”. So, having a girlfriend and staying faithful to her makes a man more desireable. I’m sure if you were to have a girlfriend and yet do stuff with other women too, they wouldn’t be very availible then either. Because “man who cheats on his girlfriend” isn’t something any girl wants.
    XD Again, good luck~! ^^

  42. Kat said, on December 6, 2007 at 7:00 pm

    Congrats. Question though. This may have been asked before. Is this a surprise and does she read your stuff? Because if she did, it wouldnt be much of a surprise, right? And if she didnt, then why not?
    (Az’s Note: Well, she doesn’t understand English…)

  43. Pseudopadoz said, on December 6, 2007 at 7:02 pm

    You can have your woman, I’ll take the chick at the ring shop. She sounds like a smart one.
    She was cute, right?

  44. Jeff said, on December 6, 2007 at 8:24 pm

    Az, I hope you find happiness in marriage with her, She sounds like a wonderful woman.

  45. Wolfgang said, on December 6, 2007 at 8:25 pm

    Somehow I was never expecting this to happen. Congrats on finding someone that fits you so well. I wish I had heard of the donation thing before now, I would’ve chipped in if I had. Keep us updated on how all this works out. Good Luck! πŸ˜€

  46. Mel said, on December 6, 2007 at 8:58 pm

    Sounds like you love her bro. Obviously you’ll have your doubts (it IS scary) but I’d personally go for it. That being said it really doesn’t matter what I’d do. I just wish you the best of luck no matter what you do. We’re all rooting for ya.

  47. Webbster said, on December 6, 2007 at 9:04 pm

    That final internal dialogue, damn that sounds familiar. Good luck!

  48. Moon Minamino said, on December 6, 2007 at 9:20 pm

    when you’re on your death bed, are you going to say “damn I wish I had had sex with more women!” if you marry her. If you don’t marry her, do you think your regrets will outweigh your current doubts.
    I say go for it, based on every single gaijinsmash entry.
    Anyway, how does a JAPANESE person have Xenophobia? That’s like a NYC native waking up half way through their lives and suddenly be afraid of people.
    and a question ive been wondering for a long time: How much money did you get donated?

  49. Dr Chaos said, on December 6, 2007 at 10:43 pm

    Bravo, Bravo good sir. I congratulate you on coming to terms! I wish nothing but the best for you my friend!

  50. P-duce said, on December 6, 2007 at 10:46 pm

    Awww, I’m a chick and this article made me so happy! I hope she says yes!

  51. Kat said, on December 6, 2007 at 10:59 pm

    A few things to try and settle your worries. πŸ™‚
    Despite your girlfriend having PMS and getting upset over strange little things (such as you not noticing she deleted you off her friends on the Mixi page), the both of you seem to get along very well. You’ve been together for a while, so I can assume the both of you know each other quite well by now. Her parents love you, your parents love her. Judging from all your mentions of the standard Japanese sex life, you’re probably making her very happy in bed, and vice versa. You’ve been living together for some time, so you know she is somebody you could definitely share a home with.
    DO EET!

  52. thin ears said, on December 6, 2007 at 11:04 pm

    congrats man! wow you have made some steps from nice guy to asshole to soon to be married. i know how you feel, when you finally find that one girl, just go for it, you won’t regret it, and for your penis, when the marriage is good, so is the sex! Update soon!!!

  53. Anonymous said, on December 6, 2007 at 11:32 pm

    >>Or, rabid child molesters with knives riding lions
    Wow, i didnt know michael jackson was touring japan at the moment.
    Congrats though, its a big step. just make sure she doesnt make you get rid of your transformer toys once you’re hitched.

  54. Anonymous said, on December 6, 2007 at 11:32 pm

    >>Or, rabid child molesters with knives riding lions
    Wow, i didnt know michael jackson was touring japan at the moment.
    Congrats though, its a big step. just make sure she doesnt make you get rid of your transformer toys once you’re hitched.

  55. Patrick said, on December 7, 2007 at 1:17 am

    Congrats, Az! So, will you be dressed as Megatron or Optimus for the ceremony?
    And, will there ever be pictures? Come on, we need pictures.

  56. T said, on December 7, 2007 at 1:33 am

    Congratulations! ^__^
    Like a previous commentor, I’m paranoid about your girlfriend finding out from the website. She knows some words, right? Ring? Proposal? You should totally have codeworded it and titled it something obscure like “Mitochondria in Action!!” :< What if she’s putting your site into Japanese to English translators?! *shakes you*
    Also, you have to tell us how you choose to propose πŸ˜€

  57. Elestial said, on December 7, 2007 at 1:54 am

    “Ladies, do you have any sort of explanation for why this is?”
    Married/taken guys always seem to have more confidence. Confidence is very attractive. The last 4-5 guys at work I’ve noted interest in all turned out to be married. -________-
    Best of luck to you and your girlfriend!~

  58. Brad said, on December 7, 2007 at 2:00 am

    Let me add my advance congratulations to the pile of comments you already have. S’pose this means you won’t want any more e-mail from your readers, since you’ll have an Honest-To-Goodness Wife. Qapla’!

  59. Elbee said, on December 7, 2007 at 2:07 am

    Hey Az,
    I’ve been a big fan for a long time and I’m glad you have found someone who makes you happy. It’s odd, so many people I know are getting engaged/married this year!
    Anyway, I think it’s right that you should think about it and make sure this is what you want to do. I also think it’s great that you recognize that marriage is a commitment, and you shouldn’t go into it thinking “well, there’s always divorce.” There is, but I think people count on it too much and so don’t take marriage seriously. I don’t think the Anxiety will ever go away. It’s a big bloody choice, and like any big life choice, you will always have part of you wonder if it was wrong. Go with your heart and once you decide, don’t look back. And if you hit a bump in the road, don’t panic! It’s to be expected. It’s all about the ups and downs. You probably knew that, but.
    Of course this is all coming from a 21 year old, so what do I know? πŸ™‚
    GOOD LUCK!!!! I hope you will be HAPPY!! You deserve it! πŸ˜€

  60. Dead Sexy Vocab said, on December 7, 2007 at 2:32 am

    I’ve read your blogs for a long time now (3 to 4 years!). Recounting all the adventures you had, it felt like I was there along with you, like Navi, ‘cept on the Internet. And instead of helping, I just laugh.
    It’s great of you to finally find happiness with one girl. I heartily congratulate you on your decision, and the best of all well wishes to you and your future fiancΓ©!
    Dick Dodger Apprentice, OUT!

  61. allisonwonderland said, on December 7, 2007 at 2:46 am

    Hi Az, long-time reader first time commenter. Just wanted to say Congratulations and Good Luck! Even with all your doubts (which are natural, hell, I’m a girl and the idea of marriage scares me to death – but then again I’m also 22, so…) it sounds like you really love her and that’s the main thing – it comes out so clearly in the Body Parts Bit. Listen to Heart, dude seems to know what he’s talking about.
    As for why girls seem to want you more when you’ve got a girlfriend, that’s an easy one. When I know a guy has a girlfriend it definitely makes him more attractive to me (unless he’s trying to hit on me while the girlfriend crying on his shoulder can’t see – this has happened to me, what a creep) although of course I don’t act on it. It’s not an all-powerful aphrodisiac – if the guy wasn’t that attractive to me to begin with I won’t suddenly have to have him, but it always helps. When we know you have a girlfriend, we see you making some level of commitment and we know someone can stand you, it means there must be something good about you. We assume (sometimes erroneously) a guy who is a boyfriend must be boyfriend material… And of course, there’s always the want-what-you-can’t-have/grass-is-always-greener-on-the-other-side factor.
    In my experience as a woman, guys also seem to be more interested when I have a boyfriend. The difference is that this is often without/before knowing I have a boyfriend (the guys who still try after they know are generally ones to stay away from, I’ve learned.) There is such a dramatic difference that it makes me wonder if I am unconsciously happier, more confident, more relaxed, etc. when I have a boyfriend. That’s the only way I can think of that makes sense. Do I have some kind of aura of desperateness when single that I don’t know about that attract only creepy men old enough to be my father, and, amongst those my own age, people I could not be less attracted to? It seems like a cruel joke of fate, doesn’t it? I had a cute guy stop traffic to ask me out once, and of course I had a boyfriend. I met a drop-dead gorgeous Australian sex god (well, he seemed like he would be) while traveling who really wanted me too, and of course, I had a boyfriend. My God that was *so hard* to turn down.
    Again, best of luck!!!

  62. JeniOctavia said, on December 7, 2007 at 2:48 am

    You’ve already got a ton of comments on here, and you’re gonna get a ton more, but as I just started reading GS (and LOVE IT), I figured I should at least send well wishes your way, even if its the millionth one you get. πŸ˜›
    You’re taking a huge step, but she sounds wonderful, and so much better than your Ex. After all you’ve been through, you totally deserve that. So, good luck good luck good luck! =D
    on the thing of life moving fast in just five years?
    When you started this adventure of yours I was still living in a tiny town in Southern Oregon, wasting my life at a call center that was quickly dying due to lack of accounts, living with my family.
    I’m now in Portland with my partner, struggling a little, but happy and moving towards becoming a graphic artist. I also randomly have a diploma in culinary arts that I got in a year.
    So, YES! Life really does go that insanely fast! We’re all on this crazy ride together, just sitting in different sections of the car. πŸ™‚

  63. NightShadows said, on December 7, 2007 at 3:11 am

    The “Having single people throw themselves at others AFTER they are taken” happens to women as well. I have some theories about this, though.
    1- Men/Women are drawn to the lure of the unattainable, so when taken, the man/woman becomes desirable.
    2- When single, a person gives off an aura or scent or what have you that somehow chases prospective err.. mates. ^_^
    3- God or The Gods just hate people like you and I and we have to really work hard to find people to love us.
    4- That old gem, “Nice Guys (And Girls) Finish Last.
    Does that help? Probably not, it never helped me much.
    by the way… CONGRATULATIONS! She is a lucky girl. I too have a “Transformers” man, and he is great, although the tickle quizzes about Transformers leave me breathless.

  64. Patrick said, on December 7, 2007 at 3:18 am

    Good luck, Az. I really thought you wanted to get out of that mess, but love conquers all, huh? As long as you’re happy man. Big love from the Bay Area!

  65. TGM said, on December 7, 2007 at 3:25 am

    Aw, the only bad thing about her pointing out the ring and finding the size is it takes the guess work out of it. It is very easy to listen to someone saying what they want, but it’s much more special if you know them so well that you pick out the best one on your own, and even more importantly, surprise them.
    It’s obvious that she is thinking marriage as well at this point, hence all the ring business. It makes it easy for you, that’s for sure, but it’s just a mite less exciting since it’s less surprising.

  66. flash_fox said, on December 7, 2007 at 3:27 am

    Az, this is your chance, this is fate! I mean, why else would she decide to go to the exact same jewelry shop you just went to (and one that would be that helpful!) and that you would find a perfect moment to get in contact with her mom? This is no coincidence, it’s a sign! Don’t let this go to waste! I say go for it! We are all rooting for you!

  67. Davey said, on December 7, 2007 at 5:01 am

    Good luck, mate.

  68. Rorshak said, on December 7, 2007 at 2:59 pm

    Congratulations Az. I hope the proposal goes smoothly.

  69. Loki said, on December 7, 2007 at 3:15 pm

    The whole can’t find a girl when you’re single thing? That’s not exclusive to guys you know. Girls have the same problem too… all the decent guys are taken when we’re single, and the ones that aren’t are totally creepy!
    Anyways, γƒ—γƒ­γƒγ‚ΉγŒγ‚“γ°γ£γ¦γ‚ˆοΌ (I apologize if my spelling/grammar/whatever is off… I’ve only been learning Japanese for about a year now)

  70. kittu said, on December 7, 2007 at 4:19 pm

    Yes, things do seem to go by fast with me as well.
    Good luck with Pop-The-Question-day, give us details on it when you can.

  71. Curtis Cage said, on December 7, 2007 at 4:24 pm

    Holy crap! all these posts! this is like reading densha otoku!
    Oi Bigu Braku Dude.. Ganbatte!
    P.S. If you don’t post pics of the wedding, I want a refund!
    Curtis Cage(d) Penguin.

  72. Rose said, on December 7, 2007 at 4:29 pm

    Congratulations and good luck, dear! She sounds like a lovely girl, and of course she’s incredibly lucky to have found someone like you. Be happy together, and best of luck to both of you!
    P.S. Thank you for five years of great writing – after all that work, you deserve to have the best.

  73. noot said, on December 7, 2007 at 4:44 pm

    Good luck! and Dont forget to invite watson!
    speaking of invites, can all us guys who have been reading (or at least those who donated) get a wedding invite? I’d love to have a reason to come to japan! And folks to say hello to…..

  74. Mimi said, on December 7, 2007 at 5:25 pm

    Congrats on making such a huge step. I really hope the proposal turns out well! Good luck to you.
    Like a few of the previous posters, I, too, am curious about the father’s reaction (assuming that the father is in the picture).

  75. CharChar said, on December 7, 2007 at 6:17 pm

    Yes, pictures! And gift registry!
    I wish you the best of luck! And as one said before me, maybe premarital counseling would be a good idea, just to somehow vent your concerns out to someone and get some advice. Every little bit helps. Or hey, if you get along with her mom well enough, why not talk to her about it? Not only does it give +10 in son-in-law approval points, but a special confidence boost on both sides since you seem to care about her a lot πŸ™‚
    But that’s just my crazy little self talking. I’d say swallow your fears and go for it, life’s meant to be unexpected and to be enjoyed, not spent drowning in worry. Go for it~!

  76. Serge said, on December 7, 2007 at 7:24 pm

    I emailed you before to ask if I can make a manga out of your life…this would be a perfect ending chapter thing. Congrats! Oh, aren’t you gonna ask your parents about this?

  77. Nickolas said, on December 8, 2007 at 1:41 am

    Wow. i wish you all the luck you will need. and remember to tell us the good news!!!

  78. Agenta said, on December 8, 2007 at 2:10 am

    Glad to hear you’re thinking of tying the knot! Seems like a big scary step, but if she can endure Japanese students’ pestering, and a week of collarbone patient treatment, then hang on to her real tight!
    Counting on you to make it really romantic for her… I mean, reading the way her best friends’ boyfriends proposed to them, anything like a post candlelit dinner proposal in the moonlight will be just dandy.
    Is this the same girl your mum told you to “be gentle” with? =D
    Good luck with it~!
    (Az’s Note: A week? I was in traction for at least 4 months with the collarbone injury.
    And yes, it’s the “be gentle” girl. She’s been around since the “Show Me The Honey” editorial.)

  79. Treiale said, on December 8, 2007 at 5:23 am

    Good luck, Az! I wish you all the best, and I sincerely hope that everything goes just as you and your ladyfriend would like.

  80. Godzirra said, on December 8, 2007 at 6:12 am

    Regarding things “moving fast” in 5 years, from attempted pokes in the ass to being (almost) married …
    Remember, everyone (american) has gone from birth to kindergarten …
    which, if anything, it goes from getting poked in the ass to starting something that seems like it will last forever …

  81. D-san said, on December 8, 2007 at 10:25 am

    Well, this is my first post on here ever, but I’ve been enjoying reading your whole blog.
    I’m a black guy engaged to a Japanese woman as well, I love seeing our two cultures coming together. There should be more of us. Best of luck to you.
    Check us out:
    The last time we were in Kyoto

    Cover Photo
  82. Camille said, on December 8, 2007 at 4:06 pm

    Hate to tell you this… but she knows. Silly boys, thinking you can surprise us.

  83. Wayland said, on December 9, 2007 at 12:11 am

    Keep persisting to be greater each day, Az. Much love and support from me, bro.

  84. Matt Metford said, on December 9, 2007 at 12:30 am

    Good luck with Misty, Az. She’s a lucky gorilla. I’m impressed that you were able to communicate with her mom so easily, though! Does she do sign language too?
    Seriously though, good luck man. Ganbatte.

  85. Keyne said, on December 9, 2007 at 1:19 am

    Awwwwww, Az!
    That is the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard in my entire life!
    That is absolutely adorable, so I wish you the best of luck in your proposal and your marriage, and I just wish I could come to the wedding! (Kidding, I’m not that creepy).
    But as for the, “When I’m dating, women are literally throwing themselves at me, but when I’m single my dating life as about as active and exciting as a senior citizen’s game of shuffleboard.”,
    it’s because women like a chase.
    When you’re single, there’s really no reason to go after you. You’re open for everyone!
    It’s more fun if there’s somebody else in the way.

  86. janet said, on December 9, 2007 at 1:36 am

    hello Az!
    first-time commenter… ^^
    i really wish you the best of luck!! you really deserve it!

  87. Fangren said, on December 9, 2007 at 2:51 am

    I don’t quite recall how I first found your editorials on Outpost Nine, or even how long ago it was. I bookmarked them, and read a good deal with them (not all, and I don’t think I got to the post-JET ones). They entertained me, needless to say, but eventually my interest turned to other things. I’m not entirely sure why I decided to check the site again a few days ago (though I suspect I may have recalled Moeko’s Owl…truly an unforgettable story), but once I got to this new site, I reread the entire archive.
    Obviously, I finished it not too long ago, and was moved to comment. I mean, here you are, at a crucial moment in your life, trying to make a decision that will profoundly impact the remainder of your existence…it’s not really my place to give people advice, especially since I’m only 19 and have never had a girlfriend, but since I’m a nice guy, I just have this instinct to offer people whatever help I can provide.
    I don’t know you much, only from these wonderful editorials. But, you don’t seem at all like a bad person. Countless times I have read you, having reflecting on the unfortunate circumstances in your life, question what sort of bad karma you inherited from a previous life, or why God has decided to simply hate you.
    I don’t believe in God or anything, but at least for the karma perspective, I have an idea…perhaps all the bad things that have happened in your life were not punishment for the deeds of a past incarnation, but rather simply to balance out the remarkable good in your later life. Think about it…everything about the proposal has fallen into place. The ring, the mother, the support from all sides, everything. If karma could be personified, I think it would be trying to tell you something like this:
    “Dude. Remember all that shit I’ve given you over the years? Six Flags? The bitch of an ex and her genitalia-mutilating sexual maneuvers? The legions of Japanese schoolchildren trying to violate you? The missed opportunities for sex? The underage girls that have wanted to sleep with you? The countless people stereotyping you based off the actions of a well-known idiot? The countless people stereotyping you simply because you don’t look like them? The idiot teachers? The bastard students? The Carpenters? Yeah. She’ll make up for every ounce of that shit, and more so. She’s put up with you for this long, and clearly wants marriage. Do it.”
    You must have realized by now that every choice we make has the potential for disastrous consequences. But, that doesn’t stop us from making them. We can’t live life afraid of the worst, we should live with hope for the best. After everything that has happened over there, do you have any regrets about coming to Japan? After everything you’ve been through with this girl, do you regret dating her?
    If you are still unsure, perhaps you should try writing an editorial devoted to her. It doesn’t need to be posted, but I get the feeling that it would help you to make this decision.
    Again, I’m in no place to be giving you, or anyone else, advice. I wasn’t around when donations were relevant, and I’m broke anyway, so I couldn’t do anything there. But, if I have been of some help to you, then I am happy. If not, then I tried my best, and I won’t ever regret this ‘comment’.
    I wish you good luck, and a happy life.

  88. Dedendre said, on December 9, 2007 at 4:40 am

    Go get ‘er Az!
    Been a fan since Outpost Nine!
    Good luck man!

  89. Anonymous said, on December 9, 2007 at 1:11 pm

    Granted that I don’t know you personally, and have never met either you or your girlfriend. So my advice may not amount to much. But it sounds to me from the things you’ve said here that you really like her and she really likes you. Aside from PMS week, you guys get along really well. And hell, she even puts up with your nerd tendencies. Sounds like you’ve found yourself a keeper.
    But of course, you can’t take the advice of some Anonymous stranger over the interwebs. It sounds like you’ve definitely given the issue a lot of thought. If you think she’ll be the right one for you, don’t hesitate to sieze the chance. Maintaining the status quo and risking nothing may lead to disappointment in the long run.
    But whatever your decision, good luck with your plans, and may happiness find you one way or the other.

  90. Chronolocke said, on December 9, 2007 at 9:56 pm

    Hey, Az, I think it’s pretty cool you’re proposing. At some point after you propose, show us a picture of that ring (up to you if you want your fiancee’s finger included. πŸ˜‰ ). Good luck with your Christmas holidays!

  91. Good luck said, on December 9, 2007 at 11:10 pm

    Wow, am I the only one who has realized?
    The whole “hey! let’s go jewelry shopping at the stores you just went to and try on rings for no reason” thing isn’t coincidence (confidence level: ~95%). She’s seen through everything already, or come close enough to figure most of it out (she might think that you were thinking of a nice Christmas present, but she almost certainly saw you shopping there and wanted to take you there to see what you were up to, or else a friend of hers saw you and called; never underestimate the Japanese women’s γ‘γ„γŸγ„ spy network…).
    But that’s a good thing, I think. She probably wouldn’t have helped you with the plan if she was opposed to the idea. In other words, you’re virtually guaranteed to get a yes πŸ™‚
    ι ‘εΌ΅γ¦γ‚ˆοΌ

  92. Kevin said, on December 10, 2007 at 3:16 am

    So you went from dodging dickgrabbing from Jr. High Japanese boys to marriage. Damn. I only read for about 6 weeks but damn, thats quite a transition.
    I’m still waiting to hear what the Octopus is. Tell the world what it on your death bed maybe?

  93. Ang said, on December 10, 2007 at 3:41 am

    I hope whatever decision you make is the right one for you and your girl.
    By the way, your recent article URLs are being clipped by… something? For instance, this one came up as “proposal_prepar.phtml” and I had to type in the rest of the word before it would load. Older articles are fine.

  94. Peter Eng said, on December 10, 2007 at 3:43 am

    “Does life move this quickly/extremely for anyone else, or is it just me?”
    Two years ago, my best friend Rick met Heidi. Last January, they got married. So yes, it does move that quickly for some people.

  95. Nils said, on December 10, 2007 at 3:09 pm

    “She also said she was insanely jealous of her own daughter for having found a guy like me.”
    So she’d rather have a big black gaijin penis for her daughter than a tiny Japanese one. πŸ˜€

  96. PW said, on December 10, 2007 at 3:50 pm

    good luck
    Nice article btw, I could really sense your happiness with the clerk from the Loft.

  97. Isa said, on December 10, 2007 at 10:23 pm

    I’ve been reading for ages, but never commented. I can’t resist commenting on this though.
    Congratulations! Enjoy every part of this process because, hopefully, you’ll never get to do it again.

  98. Beto said, on December 10, 2007 at 11:07 pm

    For the past five years, I’ve read your posts and they have brought smiles, enjoyment, and insight into a culture that seems so foreign and familiar.
    I have recently proposed to my girlfriend after a long courtship and your recent post made me recall the anxieties that led up to my proposal. The memory of her seeing the ring and her realization that you have committed yourself to her will rank highly among the rites of passage one will experience.
    I wish you the best

  99. Mel said, on December 11, 2007 at 12:10 am

    Although Ive only read Gaijin Smash since summer, I really feel happy for you! Lets hope to hear some good stories =]

  100. Shamie said, on December 11, 2007 at 5:02 am

    From stuff I’ve heard, sex life gets better while in marriage. I don’t want to cite my sources, because although I think you’re awesome, I’m lazy. This blog made me get marriage pangs, godfuckingdamnitestrogen. Stop making me say, “awwwwwwwe~~~”.

  101. Matt said, on December 11, 2007 at 3:22 pm

    This unholiest of unions will lead us to the new super race – Blackanese.
    Congrats, dude. Been enjoying the stories for years now. Be gentle with her, of course.

  102. Daeosteros said, on December 12, 2007 at 5:07 am

    Good luck Az…
    and don’t stop donating people the wedding is going to cost a whole lot more than your planning. Finally made the leap last month and my wallet still aches.

  103. raye said, on December 12, 2007 at 8:06 pm

    Hey Az!
    This is my second time posting since I came to! Good Luck with your proposal! When you had mentioned that your girlfriend wanted to take you into the jewerly store, I was like, Man, she’s throwing huge hints your way. It seems a though she is more than ready to get married!!
    Its really cool that her mom is down with you guys. I know that if my man to be wasn’t black, my family (especially my grandparents) would flip out. Random Question: Is your girlfriend an only child? I’ll understand if your too busy to answer.
    About the single/taken theory. I think that girls are attracted to guys that are taken because its like “He’s with her? I didn’t know he liked those type of girls. I could so have him if I wanted to.” Then it subconsiously becomes competition as the outside girls tries her hardest to get the guy to look at her or flirt with her. Or it’s like “He has a girlfriend? *in a shocked tone*” Then for the girl whose shocked, it automatically forces the girl to look at the guy in a different way in which she would never have before.
    Anyways, Good luck! Make it special!
    (Az’s Note: She’s the middle of three siblings.)

  104. Patrick said, on December 13, 2007 at 1:24 am

    Wait, she’s the middle sibling…?
    Send the younger one my way!
    (Az’s Note: …Ok. I bet you and he can have a lot of fun together.
    The older one’s a girl, but she also has the capacity to physically kill you.)

  105. David Landry said, on December 13, 2007 at 1:05 pm

    congrats on the whole thing man!!!
    this is flippin’ awesome!!! AWESOME!! you have come a long way, and there is still a way to go, but i know that you are happy now…
    peace out dude.

  106. Patrick said, on December 13, 2007 at 10:27 pm

    Oh, the younger one is male. Never mind then, I must have missed that somewhere. Although, we could still have fun. Bet he’s never been to an American strip club.
    As for the older one being able to kill me… Is that supposed to be a turn off?

  107. Xak said, on December 13, 2007 at 10:44 pm

    “When I’m dating, women are literally throwing themselves at me, but when I’m single my dating life as about as active and exciting as a senior citizen’s game of shuffleboard. Delayed by rain. Ladies, do you have any sort of explanation for why this is?”
    That’s simple. When you’re not dating, you’re LOOKING. That’s unattractive. Because who knows how much ‘looking’ you’re doing? Then, there’s the fact that we’re not seeing you at your dating best. It’s sexy to see a man taking care of a woman and we want to be taken care of (in whatever sense we’re peeking into your life). And a guy looking to propose–I mean, don’t you realize what that says about you?
    1. You’re not a commitment-phobe (or not an obvious one)
    2. You’re the marrying type
    3. You care about someone enough to consider spending the rest of your life with them–making you a caring person.
    What’s more, as for the livejournal-esque feel to this post–I enjoy all your posts. You’re hilarious, offer me a peek into a world totally different from the one I’m living in, but that my sorta step-father (Japanese) grew up in, which is interesting in and of itself.
    Thank you for continuing your story. And good luck! 幸運をη₯ˆγ‚‹

  108. draglancer said, on December 17, 2007 at 3:06 am

    Ah.. these past few years. I was here when OP9’s layout wasnt as it is now, and when your first few editorials came out. You remember our little chat about baseball and I think San Francisco? πŸ˜€
    I’m glad that you finally tied the knot we now know as marriage. I really am happy that you found to put up with your “transformer” habits. And near the end of this year is your proposal date eh? Tell us how it goes. I really do hope for the best of the situation. Rawr!! Get em’ Tiger!
    To the best of ya.

  109. Vx said, on December 19, 2007 at 6:43 am

    Best wishes for a long and happy marriage to you Az, bumped upon outpostnine on a link from SRK one day and have been reading on and off since.
    Congrats dude!

  110. Prodigal Priest said, on December 19, 2007 at 8:14 pm

    “I look back on my time in Japan, and it kind of amazes me. I’ve gone from dancing around 12-year old boys, trying not to get grabbed or poked in the ass, to psyching myself up for a marriage proposal. And all in within a 5 year timespan. Does life move this quickly/extremely for anyone else, or is it just me?”
    It’s not just you…. it’s all of us, man :D.
    For what it’s worth….. from a single guy to a man about to hand his dancing shoes in, Good Luck. But, I saw this coming back when you mentioned you were living with her months ago ;).
    Again, good luck, Merry Christmas, and God Bless ^^.

  111. Dave D. said, on December 19, 2007 at 11:36 pm

    I finally have gotten to read your posts again after a significant abscene. Dude, I wish you the best. I’m really happy that you’ve found such an awesome girl whose family loves you also. May you have a beautiful family and future! πŸ™‚
    Good luck and Merry Christmas!

  112. anonymous said, on December 21, 2007 at 5:22 pm

    Congrats !! I’m so happy for you , we need every detail of the proposal.
    My take on women liking ‘taken’ men is that it shows that you are able to be in a relationship and are loyal not like some single men who are just total dogs. It’s easier to see a man as a potential boyfriend when you see him acting like one… if that makes sense.

  113. celestial-salamander said, on December 22, 2007 at 11:42 pm

    don’t worry Az i like the life journal stuff. that thing were you copy and past stuff from the news seems lazy. still nothing beets first hand recounts of the weirdness of Japan.
    “And what is up with that, anyway? When I’m dating, women are literally throwing themselves at me, but when I’m single my dating life as about as active and exciting as a senior citizen’s game of shuffleboard. Delayed by rain. Ladies, do you have any sort of explanation for why this is?”
    i believe their are Meany reasons for that.
    1. in this case there is one major reason. you were about to marry that girl, marriage for many girls especially Japanese girl marriage is the big thing. it’s like sex is for young men. it’s the hole point of dating. when see soar you getting a ring she was like “hay this man knows how to satisfy a woman i gott’a get me some of that ring action there boo’ya”
    2. The grass is always greener on the other side. people want what they can’t have
    3. When you have a girl you seem less desprat.
    4. perhaps when you with someone you are calmer and you’re “she like me”detector works better.

  114. Sheikeh said, on January 2, 2008 at 3:09 pm

    Maybe the store clerk thought that it was for your boyfriend? 85% of Japan is gay if the internet is any indication.

  115. Ian said, on January 4, 2008 at 10:24 am

    Hey Az, I just wanted to offer my most heartfelt congratulations. The girl sounds awesome. I got engaged myself recently, though it was much more impromptu than your planning (drunk at a bar, playing darts– we got the ring the next day, lol). As another Outpost Nine veteran, I’m happy to see that everything has gone so well for you. Not for nothing, I really dig the site, and you by proxy (you also gave me the Gmail invite, so gotta give props for that).
    As far as the “Grass is Greener” effect, I quote Alec Baldwin in The Departed (or Depahted, to quote Bostonians everywhere) “Women see a ring on your finger, and they know two things- you have a little bit of money and your cock works.”
    Congrats again, man.

  116. Ian said, on January 4, 2008 at 10:26 am

    Hey Az, I just wanted to offer my most heartfelt congratulations. The girl sounds awesome. I got engaged myself recently, though it was much more impromptu than your planning (drunk at a bar, playing darts– we got the ring the next day, lol). As another Outpost Nine veteran, I’m happy to see that everything has gone so well for you. Not for nothing, I really dig the site, and you by proxy (you also gave me the Gmail invite, so gotta give props for that).
    As far as the “Grass is Greener” effect, I quote Alec Baldwin in The Departed (or Depahted, to quote Bostonians everywhere) “Women see a ring on your finger, and they know two things- you have a little bit of money and your cock works.”
    Congrats again, man.

  117. Helene said, on January 4, 2008 at 5:59 pm

    Wow, dude, so many congratulations!
    …as for the thing about girls and their weird habit of throwing themselves at you when you’re not available…well. Speaking as a female of the species, it’s one part the “we only notice how awesome something is when another woman has it, especially if she’s cute” thing, and the other part of it is…well, you just look loved when you’re in a good relationship. The calm and confidence that comes with that is highly attractive to people, men and women alike; I should know, as soon as I got engaged myself suddenly all these guys were hitting on me.
    A woman who knows your favourite Decepticon, though, is a truly valuable above all the jewels of the world. Good luck, man!

  118. DoryCakes said, on January 5, 2008 at 5:24 pm

    (Been reading since OutpostNine, never commented)
    Az! I’m so happy for you! Reading over your 5 years worth of insane experiences, you defiantly deserve it πŸ˜€
    And guys with girlfriends seem nicer or more sensitive for some reason. It’s pretty weird.

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