Gaijin Smash

I am a Japanese School Teacher…Again

Posted in Blog by gaijinsmashnet on May 10, 2007

I took a job as an assistant English teacher for two Japanese junior high schools. …Sound familiar?
I didn’t want to, I really didn’t. Can you blame me? It’s a lot like finally getting off of Gilligan’s Island, and then offering the castaways another 3-hour tour. Unfortunately, I didn’t have a whole lot of options. My visa was going to run out soon, and I had a nice, shiny new apartment that wasn’t going to pay for itself. There was nothing else on the market, and I didn’t have the luxury of being choosy. I took the job so that I wouldn’t deported get faster than Elian Gonzales*, with the intent of jumping ship as soon as I found something better.
*Since this is Japan, I doubt I’d have to stare down the barrel of an assault rifle. Probably just a samurai sword or a cell phone being wagged in disapproval or something.
For the record, this isn’t JET. There are a number of companies within Japan who also work in sending Gaijin ALT’s to schools. Quite a few schools also avoid the middle man and just hire foreigners directly. I signed up with one of the dispatch companies. This time, they would be sending me out to two junior high schools, in a suburb outside of Osaka city. Before heading out, I got a chance to meet one of my new English teachers, a nice older Japanese man who reminded me a lot of Mr. W from Watson’s School. After telling him I’d served for three years in three schools in Kyoto Prefecture, he told me “Well, since this is Osaka, unfortunately you may find that the kids aren’t as well-behaved as they were in Kyoto.”
I had to take a few minutes to tell him all about the Ghetto School. You know, I’ve seen grown men lose faith in their professions before…just never so quickly. That had to have been some kind of record or something.

This teacher’s school was the smallest of the two. However, it was slightly bigger than Watson’s School, which had been the biggest of my three back in Kyoto. Much as he had described, the kids definitely had a different flavor to them. This was apparent right off the bat by the number of kids with dyed hair.
I’m not sure exactly when it started, but the Japanese have hit a hair dyeing trend that doesn’t seem like it’s going to go away anytime soon. In a nation where, genetically, 99% of the population is born with black hair, at least 50% of them have dyed it various shades of light brown, or in extreme cases, golden blond (maybe they’re trying to become Super Saiyans? You can’t have a power lever OVER NINE THOUSAND! unless you’ve got blond hair…). Although I don’t think it’s the same for high school, in my experiences with junior high school, it was sort of an unwritten rule that students were not to dye their hair. Of course, it was nothing the school could truly enforce – could you imagine a Hair Police going around the neighborhood and checking to make sure all preteens still have black hair? But it was just frowned upon.
Therefore, a good way to tell what kind of control the teachers had over the students (or vice versa) was to take a head count of all the aspiring Super Saiyans among the student body. Back on JET, The School of Peace had exactly zero kids with dyed hair, Watson’s School had maybe one, and the Ghetto School had at least 10. Not counting the kids who shaved all their hair off in a pseudo attempt to become “hard”, and not counting the special boy who had shaved fake cornrows into his head.
So yeah, the new school had quite a bit of dyed-hair kids, which was a bit unsettling. I remember on my first day there, seeing one such sannensei girl. She’d taken it one step further – aside from the golden hair, she’d made it big. Really big. Somewhere between Peg Bundy, and Marge Simpson. She was also wearing enough makeup to kill a pharmaceutical test-pig, and had her skirt hiked up to the point where I simply don’t know why she even bothered to put it on.
I’ll never forget seeing her for the first time. She was sitting on a staircase talking to some friends. As she saw me, again, Big Black Man Fear kicked in (she is still Japanese, after all), causing her to fall right off the staircase, legs sprawled out. With her skirt hiked up to Canada, this of course exposed her panties. Her grandma panties. I don’t know why a 15 year old girl with a hiked-up schoolgirl skirt is wearing grandma panties, and quite honestly, I don’t want to. Maybe she thought it would keep all her STD’s from spilling out? Anyway, the way she’s sprawled out on the floor, just about everybody could see her Granny Panties. I could see them, the other teachers could see them, you the readers who don’t live in Japan could probably have seen them, shit, Stevie Fucking Wonder could have seen them. Despite this, she makes NO effort to try and cover herself, nor do any of the teachers attempt to get her to at least close her legs.
Granny Panties: …Oh wow, it’s a huge black guy.
Teacher: Yes, and he’s going to be your new English teacher from now on.
Granny Panties: Really? Well, hello I guess!
Me: …I refuse to acknowledge your existence until you at least close your legs.
If I thought this was something else, I wasn’t prepared for the other school.
The other school was at least twice as big as the first, and there were quite a few dyed hair kids. But, that wasn’t what caught my immediate attention. Most of you are all aware of the schoolgirl sock phenomenon – where girls wear knee-high socks to go with their uniforms. I don’t even think the socks are required, it’s just a thing that almost all of the girls do. Usually, the socks are white, but that could change depending on the school’s color scheme. Well, this school featured a black and red color scheme, so most of the girls wore black socks. And ordinarily, that would be fine.
But a lot of the girls choose to wear black stockings instead of black socks. Which, honestly, coupled with the hiked-up skirts, made them look like adolescent whores parading around the school. I know it’s not an official school rule or anything (“Thou shalt not look like a whore?”), but if I were principal of a school I don’t think I’d want my female students looking like ladies of the night. Sadly though, I’ve been in Japan just about long enough for this kind of thing to roll right off my back. “14 year old girls who look like prostitutes. Right. Oh hey look, something shiny over there!”
One girl I absolutely could not ignore though – she wore fishnet stockings…with a garter belt. Think about that for a second, let it properly sink in. Fishnet stockings…with a garter belt. That’s not even like Junior Ho in Training, that is just a Full-Fledged Ho. You can’t even buy that shit unless you pass the Ho Test, I’m sure.
Girl: Okay, I’ll take these fishnet stockings with garter belt.
Cashier: Before I can sell these to you, I have to confirm your Ho Status. …Have you had sex with at least 10 men for monetary gain?
Girl: …In the last hour? Hmm….can I count the guys separately even if it was at the same time?
Cashier: Okay, you qualify.
I guess we can only hope that the garter belt wasn’t attached to a splendid pair of Granny Panties.
And this was only my first day on the new job. …Here we go again.


60 Responses

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  1. Zuuk said, on May 10, 2007 at 2:41 pm

    Hurrah for Whores! What did the bartender say was a “good” age for a mistress? 13-17?

  2. Karl Speer said, on May 10, 2007 at 3:32 pm

    Hey Az, what does the scanner say about her whore level? XD

  3. Shamie said, on May 10, 2007 at 3:44 pm

    Oh dear God. Random flashback: When I was in 4th grade for Halloween (shudder placed here) I dressed as a Wild West Table Dancer… actually, I didn’t know I was. I just raided my mom’s closet and found some cool outfit that now I know looks like a mix of a gaudy transvestite and slutty pirate ninja. I got to some old man’s house Trick-or-Treating and he looked at me with a lot of thought and asked if I was a table dancer. I’m not sure what look I was going for, but I told my mom later and she decided to hide those clothes from me from then on. Ahhhh, childhood. BUT, that was Halloween, which is International-Dress-Like-A-Skank-Day.

  4. Johnston said, on May 10, 2007 at 4:00 pm

    You really need to start carrying a digital camera around. You live in Japan; you must at least have a cell phone with a camera. Ms. T, Hot Nurse, Ms. Americanized… now Granny Panties and Ho High? Dammit we need pics!

  5. Anonymous said, on May 10, 2007 at 4:04 pm

    Man. And fishnets are a huge fetish of mine too. Damnit. Since when did they become token ho attire anyway? It’s like your favourite candy you only find rarely, but with a guaranteed trip to the penis doctor.

  6. Anonymous said, on May 10, 2007 at 4:04 pm

    Man. And fishnets are a huge fetish of mine too. Damnit. Since when did they become token ho attire anyway? It’s like your favourite candy you only find rarely, but with a guaranteed trip to the penis doctor.

  7. Tekkarath said, on May 10, 2007 at 4:16 pm

    Oh lawdy.

  8. Anonymous said, on May 10, 2007 at 4:49 pm

    it starts again! This time is probably going to be tougher for you 50% yankiis man thats rough.

  9. Anonymous said, on May 10, 2007 at 4:49 pm

    it starts again! This time is probably going to be tougher for you 50% yankiis man thats rough.

  10. Neil said, on May 10, 2007 at 5:06 pm

    Ah geez, you really got yourself into another mess, haven’t you?
    I guess it’s just destiny. This site wouldn’t go so well if you weren’t a Japanese middle school English teacher.

  11. Anonymous said, on May 10, 2007 at 5:19 pm

    Seems like you’re having “fun” at your new schools. Doesn’t seem like we’ll get another Meoko’s Owl from this group…

  12. Ali said, on May 10, 2007 at 5:24 pm

    Are you back in junior high or have you moved on to a fully-flegged high school? At least as they get older doesn’t the sexual assault from the guys become rarer (although it seems to increase from the females. Well, it’s better than some things.)?

  13. SomePlayer said, on May 10, 2007 at 5:31 pm

    Hoo boy.
    Sounds like you’ll teach really weird characters,with even mor weird and/or japanese behaving…
    YAY more fun for us.
    Hang in there. I mean, what can happen? Nothing much worse than 14 yr old JapHos goin into nuclear fission over that black man in the front, young Japimps trying to tell you how to make love… you’ve been there, use your experience and a baseballbat and you’ll be fine…. kinda

  14. Anonymous said, on May 10, 2007 at 5:33 pm

    Az, I don’t know how to tell you just how sorry I am for you. Good luck, God speed, and keep on the lookout for kancho assassins…

  15. Anonymous said, on May 10, 2007 at 5:33 pm

    Az, I don’t know how to tell you just how sorry I am for you. Good luck, God speed, and keep on the lookout for kancho assassins…

  16. Caustiq said, on May 10, 2007 at 5:44 pm

    I will second that hurrah and add an “Oh shit, son.”
    Az knows how to please the rabid Japanophiles.

  17. God said, on May 10, 2007 at 6:17 pm

    If I throw free pussy at you here, don’t think about it. They’re infected.

  18. Anonymous said, on May 10, 2007 at 6:38 pm

    Just wait until all these girls lose their Big Black Guy Fear and start hitting on you, Az.
    That’s when you’re going to be creeped out. Hopefully.
    That is, unless you’ve become Japanese for real.

  19. Pseudopadoz said, on May 10, 2007 at 6:40 pm

    Ehhh… umm… Well, the first thing that comes to mind reading that is “What?” That reaction lasts until I remember you (Az) have been out of America for quite a few years and out of our public schooling for even longer. Well, sorry to say, but the whole junior miss prostitute thing is taking off quite well in America too – at least in SoCal. I tutor at a local k-8 school – I constantly see girls showing as much skin as they can without breaking dress code – some of them even in the k-5 crowd. I attend high school, and it’s even worse here, because the dress code is poorly enforced, with 10 security guards for 4000 students and even less teachers who have time to attend to dress code.
    And oh, lord, are almost all of these girls ugly anyways.

  20. Hitori said, on May 10, 2007 at 7:13 pm

    I can’t speak for all schools, but at least at my SHS (I’m an ALT) it is in fact a rule that you cannot dye your hair…if it’s even slightly dyed the teachers make the kids dye it back. My school also doesn’t even allow perms for the girls! Yet kids sleeping/talking/not paying attention in class (not my classes of course ^.^)??? No problem…

  21. Spoon said, on May 10, 2007 at 7:18 pm

    You keep on scoring massive internet points for your numerous references. By now, your internet point total has accumulated OVER NINETHOUSAND!
    In all seriousness, this is so messed up. Welcome to Japan… Welcome… To Ho city.

  22. Freedom III said, on May 10, 2007 at 8:13 pm

    I thought that was 13 and *under*…
    Anyway, all I can really say is good luck…you really going to need it this time around…

  23. ProdigalPriest said, on May 10, 2007 at 9:01 pm

    Oh boy… here we go again! XD
    I don’t like pointing out the obvious, but you are a glutton for punishment despite your reasons… in other words, a perfect Gaijin immigrant ^_^ .
    Good luck. And no matter what you do, keep Master Roshi on speed-dial lol.

  24. Patrick said, on May 10, 2007 at 9:22 pm

    Az, you poor, sad, son of a bitch. What did you do to get God so annoyed at you? I at least know what I did. I bet there are murderers and rapists in prisons who are more liked by God.
    St. Peter: This guy murdered a bus full of nuns in training. But he repented.
    God: Okay, just let him off with a beating or three, and some anal rape.
    St. Peter: Next up is this Az guy…
    God: HIM? Oh boy, what fucked up shit can we use against him today. He still trapped in Japan?
    St. Peter: Yep.
    ::God laughs maniacally::

  25. Emibee said, on May 10, 2007 at 9:24 pm

    Wow…i’m going to be working with a private eikaiwa soon, and everytime i think i’ve done enough japan research to not be shocked when i get there, you have a new story that makes me do a double take. I guess nobody can really be ready for Japan, not even if you’re from there. Poor Mr. W-2.
    Back when i was in high school- all of 4 years ago that was- we couldn’t even get away with sleeveless tops, much less go for Junior Ho dress code. You had to spot these by their pack behaviour, pancake makeup and vacant expressions, but you come across those anywhere. Then again, this is Canada, so there was really nowhere else available to hike their skirts up to. In that respect I would tell you to watch out for Japanese Catholic schools, but they might actually be the inverse of what you’d find here.

  26. Anonymous said, on May 10, 2007 at 10:10 pm

    Long time reader, first time poster.
    First grats on the job, glad you will be on your feet. As a fellow teacher I also understand the ugh factor of working with totally inappropritly dressed students. Belive me, while its not as bad yet here in the states, its only a matter of time.

  27. Anonymous said, on May 10, 2007 at 10:10 pm

    Long time reader, first time poster.
    First grats on the job, glad you will be on your feet. As a fellow teacher I also understand the ugh factor of working with totally inappropritly dressed students. Belive me, while its not as bad yet here in the states, its only a matter of time.

  28. Kosetsu said, on May 10, 2007 at 11:11 pm

    “Pussy? THIS – IS – HO TOWN!!” *kicks Granny Panties off the stairs*
    Haha. Ganbare, Az. Maybe you should do the Mamba here too.

  29. LeeGuy said, on May 11, 2007 at 12:40 am

    Hey Az, if you’re not interesed in teaching English then what the hell do you want to do in Osaka to make money, Gaijin porn, maybe? Mwahahaha!!

  30. Saint Ebony said, on May 11, 2007 at 12:55 am

    Aw, Az, I hope you know how much we appreciate your taking it up the ass for our amusement. :’)
    Looking forward to even zanier adventures on the next episode of Gaijin Smash Z~

  31. Samuel Smith said, on May 11, 2007 at 1:40 am

    Japan may seem weird but let me tell you back in the states all the young ladies dress like fucking skanks to. One look popular with highschool girls at me school is to ware whorish stockings like fishnets and lace, to school, and if thats not bad enough to wear ripped ones that make it looks like they were some dollar whore that just got taken forcibly in a dark alley/

  32. Draeger said, on May 11, 2007 at 2:38 am

    Azrael, how long is the train ride from your apartment in Kyoto to the outskirts (no pun intended) of Osaka? It must be hell having to get up extra early and I do not see how you can do it.
    Any better A3 competition in Osaka?
    (Az’s Note: It took about an hour, so I had to wake up at 6-ish. Wasn’t fun.
    Better A3 comp in Osaka? Better than a-cho? Pfft, no way. I’ll play in Osaka though to help re-build my ego up after the a-cho guys have thoroughly destroyed it.)

  33. Mary Liz said, on May 11, 2007 at 3:51 am

    Dude, you see the weirdest crap. Now new schools, and new, weirder students. I do pity you. but not to much, since you chose this (out of necessity, but a choice none the less).

  34. Kaura said, on May 11, 2007 at 4:01 am

    As everybody else has mentioned, the preteen ho phenomena has pretty much inflicted all of the Pacific.
    Ah well. At least ye have a girlfriend t’ come back home to after a harrowing day with the kids. =D

  35. Blinky said, on May 11, 2007 at 4:04 am

    All I can say is at least you have a woman to drown your sorrows into at the end of the day. That should help you survive.
    Remember, money is money and work is work and blind people (like me) can’t even GET a job over here.
    There are starving blind kids in bumfuck, Indiana who would be drooling for a job… or some altered mom-phrase like that. Well it certainly won’t be boring for a time πŸ™‚
    Before anyone asks, I use a screen reading software called Jaws.
    An aside, I just saw (if you’ll pardon the terminology) Great Teacher Onizuka so… GO GREAT TEACHER AZIZUKA! YUROSHIKU (sp) *finger*

  36. Kohaku said, on May 11, 2007 at 4:59 am

    Well, we already told you that God hates you. You’re not the only glutton for punishment, I just signed my contract for another year or 3….(it hasnt completely been decided how many more years I’ll torture myself with…I love Japan) Besides, you’ve got ALL NEW adventures to share! And yeah, the schoolgirl ho phenomenom has been goin on for a while. But what’s even funnier is the transformation on the train that they go through. From normal school girl to raging ho, on the train in the morning in less than 20 min. For those of you not in Japan able to see this, its like one of those makeover shows….for a horror movie. You take a normal looking (usually cute) girl, and watch in horrified fascination as she pulls out a mirror large enough to go above the bathroom sink, uses “enough makeup to kill a pharmacutical pig” (lol)pulls out a curling iron, goes through a few cans of hairspray, and basically changes clothes on the train….gotta love Japan. And Az, the loose socks are cool!! I love mine! (150cm)

  37. Willow said, on May 11, 2007 at 6:47 am

    Hey Az!
    Congrats on the new job.
    I think that as long as no one tells them about the “Jab-your-fingers-in-the-big-black-guy’s ass-mathon” and the “Day of the happy dick grabbing”, I think you should be safe…

  38. LordNagash said, on May 11, 2007 at 6:50 am

    Man, don’t go blaming God for all your problems. You got to the end of your contract and *stayed in Japan*
    Not only that, you signed up to teach Japanese children again. What were you thinking?
    If you want God to make you win the lottery you have to at least buy a ticket

  39. Ilhares said, on May 11, 2007 at 10:31 am

    Can’t help but envy Az a bit in all this. I am guided by considerably more relaxed ‘morals’ than he appears to be (although I agree on the negativity for the prevalance of Ho attire), but I’d certainly take time to just enjoy the occasional piece of eye candy. Might even throw in a patented DirtyOldMan leer for kicks.
    Jeff, I’m glad you opted to stick with it. Even if your daily routine is somewhat horrific, I think there’s a balance in the joy you bring to others with the relating of these stories.
    You’ve got a job that amuses us, and a woman that appears to amuse you. I can only hope your deity continues to hate you for a while longer with such things. πŸ˜‰

  40. tideman said, on May 11, 2007 at 1:46 pm

    When you write the book put me down for a copy.
    Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more,

  41. Nils said, on May 12, 2007 at 2:55 pm

    Oh, here in Germany, we had quite a lot of kids with dyed hair, weird hairstyles, and even revealing clothes, back when I was still at school, and that was more than ten years ago. There was a metalhead chick of my own age, and from 15 until the day we graduated, she liked to put on very tight t-shirts in summer (no bra, of course), cut off a centimetre or two beneath her breasts, and either really short shorts or an extremely short black vinyl skirt, along with fishnet stockings. And she changed her hair colour every three weeks or so.

  42. Anonymous said, on May 13, 2007 at 2:53 pm

    “Deported get”
    Fucking rofl
    I think I was the only one who got that reference, provided it was on purpose πŸ˜€

  43. Anonymous said, on May 13, 2007 at 2:53 pm

    “Deported get”
    Fucking rofl
    I think I was the only one who got that reference, provided it was on purpose πŸ˜€

  44. rubbav1 said, on May 13, 2007 at 4:07 pm


  45. Erin said, on May 13, 2007 at 5:28 pm

    Hooray! This should be at least as entertaining as the first round!

  46. teach said, on May 13, 2007 at 5:37 pm

    Wow, you must love torturing yourself! if you were gonna be an ALT, you couldve at least went to elementary schools where the cute factor is Moeko X 10. no kancho. no sluts. no problem. but come to think of it, japanese people love to suffer. gaman suru! i personally believe the REAL reason you stayed in japan is because you have now become japanese! you like to suffer! anyway, good luck!

  47. rubbav1 said, on May 13, 2007 at 5:44 pm

    P.S I’m 14 so I have to live through the madness and it isn’t just the west coast
    THIS IS VIRGINA (kick a random kid to the ground)
    anyway I have studied this long and hard and believe I have come up with a orgin. It starts in 5th grade when they first start to feel the pressure (I was in special ed so I missed out, dont ask)and also they hit puberty. I wish I could put that in stormy bold letters. PUBERTY!!!… Then it’s sixth grade. MY OWN PRIVATE HELL, That is when god gave up on me. 6th grade is when the ones whose pressure didn’t consume them meet up and be friends with those who had. The pressure makes you feel insecure and the only way how to deal with it is either give up and stick yourself to a tv, or computer (hi) or try to solve it in whatever crazy way your brain can think of until you can adjust. Most people aren’t that crazy to think of something themselves so they just leect on something else. Here Ho style comes in, they usually attach to whatever they can catch on tv, this results in the gangster, the ho, the jokester, the rebel and (sadly) emo. But what I also found out was that most teens think they are too mature for most tv except three or so music channels (and your favorite MTV) and Comedy Central, and for the girls a Drama shows. Anyway once they adjust to the pressure they have changed so much that they see no point in changing back. And if they don’t adjust they deeper and deeper to the dark side. Like I her one girl in my class that I used to like a blowjob to a guy that I’ve been speaking with since 6th grade. But if you try to get rid of the fad then the insecurity grows and they run risk of going through a psychoic breakdown (see Butterfly girl). Anyway just like puberty *twitch* everybody deals with it at there own pace and if their lucky they have real friends to rely on to deal with it faster. But not too fast I hope, I’m looking to get a blowjob before i make it to high school.
    P.P.S (yes I bet you all forgot that was a postscript) I’m out of S’ed and feeling the pressure

  48. Kyle said, on May 14, 2007 at 7:02 am

    This is the first time I’ve read your blog. It’s awesome. You are a great story teller first of all. Second I plan on doing JET in a year or two when I have a degree >.> Anyway you just got another avid reader.

  49. Kevin from NH said, on May 14, 2007 at 8:52 am

    Hi, long time reader (no, that’s a lie…I found this site not even a month ago, but hey, whatever), first time writer.
    I’m still in shock over Japan’s fucked up sense of sexuality. I mean, I’d like to think I’m not a stereotypical Japanophile. I read English translations of Japanese newspapers from time to time, I visit message boards, and shit like that, so I know Japan isn’t all anime, video games, and samurai (no, that’s heaven). Hell, I’ve even seen a bit on hentai and whatnot (I can only imagine what those tentacles are overcompensating for… πŸ˜‰ ), but none of that has ever prepared me for what I read in your blog.
    I dunno…maybe that’s because my middle and high-school experiences here in the armpit of the US – New Hampshire – just weren’t very interesting. I mean, yeah, we had some hos, but even they didn’t wear fishnets to school or anything overly slutty.
    One thing’s for sure, though, God does hate you. To borrow (and butcher) a quote from The Venture Brothers, you pissed in God’s eye somewhere along the lines, and he blinked.
    Good luck. I think you’re going to need it.

  50. Liz said, on May 14, 2007 at 4:05 pm

    You poor, poor fool…
    As another aspiring Japanese English teacher, I do have to say this. None of this has really phased me. I had read these when they more or less first came out and recently found it again. I was probably in shock when I first read it, but now… I just go, “That’s Japan for you.” Though, I think it could have something to do with… Washington (state). Asian tourists central + Ganguro-esque “fashions” + Japanophilia + ho-training camps in the local high schools
    The ho-train is common here on the west-coast as many have already said. I can’t go to a store and see *any* skirts that go *past* the thigh.
    Not to mention Ganguro-esque styles have become popular here in SEATTLE! Who the hell is TAN in SEATTLE that’s from around here and *white*? The fake orange tans of death! That’s what.
    Welp. Good luck, my entertainment. Good luck and may those super saiyans not attack with granny-panties.

  51. purplekitty said, on May 14, 2007 at 11:28 pm

    Hey just be glad granny panties girl even WORE underware. Imagine how you would react if she didn’t?

  52. Erojiji said, on May 15, 2007 at 12:14 am

    Maybe the boys will be so busy with the hos that you won’t need to endure a second kancho war! I mean, I suppose you could show off your ascended senses to the unsuspecting boys but… I’m pretty sure you could go without just fine XDD

  53. Aangfish said, on May 15, 2007 at 6:34 pm

    The Hair Police thing…My science teacher taught in Japan in the 90s, and he told us once that there was this punk kid in their school that dyed his hair over the weekend to brown…the teachers heard about it and when he came to school, they met him at the door and literally dragged him kicking and screaming to the gym where they dyed his hair back to black.

  54. Anonymous said, on May 17, 2007 at 9:14 am

    With “granny panties”, do you mean bloomers? Those are thought to be hot. Blame anime.
    I highly suspect anime is to blame for the popularity of the stockings + mini-skirt combo too. Coupled with the red-black color scheme it makes it sound like the dress code is Rin Tohsaka.

  55. Anonymous said, on May 17, 2007 at 9:14 am

    With “granny panties”, do you mean bloomers? Those are thought to be hot. Blame anime.
    I highly suspect anime is to blame for the popularity of the stockings + mini-skirt combo too. Coupled with the red-black color scheme it makes it sound like the dress code is Rin Tohsaka.

  56. kilreli said, on May 19, 2007 at 7:11 pm

    Az, what are you doing?! this is the exact opposite of quelling the tide of yellow fever. Do you know how many highschool boys just filled out an application for student exchange.
    And on another note, my highschool in japan was small and nothing like that. Im still trying to figure out if i was blessed or cursed…..

  57. Greg said, on June 1, 2007 at 12:35 am

    You know that deal about time being a circle? I think we’re there.

  58. Oobledegork said, on July 25, 2007 at 7:39 am

    “Hey Vegeta, what’s his power level?”
    Thanks for the reference, because this one liner has become a meme in many websites (like 4chan).

  59. Yaaka said, on August 2, 2007 at 7:15 pm

    “OVER NINE THOUSAND!” it’s things like this that keep me coming back…
    you rule…

  60. NephandiMan said, on October 12, 2007 at 8:07 am

    With all the Frank Miller references lately, I have this image in my head of Az leading a band of 300 intrepid ALT’s to defend the Gates of Sanity. I can even hear the dialogue now…
    Watson: The thousand nations of the Kancho Empire descend upon you. Our index fingers will blot out the sun!
    Az: Then we will Dodgedick in the shade.
    Ganbatte, Azrael-sensei!
    (Az’s Note: Just…brilliant.)

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