Gaijin Smash

Gaijin Smash

Posted in Blog by gaijinsmashnet on February 4, 2005

When I do my self-introduction to my students, I claim to be an English-teaching superhero. I’m mostly joking, but my friends and I have found that living here does in fact grant us superpowers. Like Superman under a yellow sun, except it’s gaijin under the Rising Sun. So one night, we decided to catalogue all the superpowers we’d acquired. Yes, a lot of beer was involved.
Before I continue, I should explain exactly what a Gaijin is. In Japanese, the word for foreigner is ‘gaikokujin’. It’s formed by joining together three words: outside ‘gai’, country ‘koku’, and person ‘jin’. In colloquial Japanese, it is often shortened to just ‘gaijin’. Most closely translated: ‘outsider’.
Intentional or not, ‘gaijin’ is perhaps more accurate than ‘gaikokujin’. Westerners are outsiders in Japanese society, as the Japanese love to constantly remind us. Japan is one big in-group, and we Gaijin will always be on the outside with no hope of getting in. However, it’s because we are outsiders that we are able to exercise the superpowers catalogued below.


Gaijin Smash – I can’t take credit for Gaijin Smash; it was my friend’s creation. A Gaijin Smash is anytime a Westerner exerts inherent dominance over the Japanese people. We do what we want and they can’t stop us. They do what we want because they can’t stand up to us. It’s beautiful. The best way to define Gaijin Smash is through examples.
When we went out drinking one of my friends would buy the cheapest return ticket, just to get him through the gates. When we’d arrive home, his ticket triggered the gate alarms, but he’d just plow right through and keep walking. The station worker would look up, and he’d want to say something, he really did. But then he was confronted by a Gaijin walking quickly away from him. I can only imagine the thoughts running through his head. “Oh my God! Do I have to speak English? What if I make him angry? Will he eat my children?” Paralyzed, the worker can only stand there while my friend escapes. Gaijin Smash.
Or, take a look at recent current events. Japan has troops in Iraq. Japan barely has troops at all yet there they are in Iraq. Why do you think that is?

President Bush: Hey Japan, America’s gonna invade Iraq. We want you to send us some troops for support.
Prime Minister Koizumi: Um, but…we don’t really have an army, just a Self-Defense Force. And NOBODY here has anything to do with Iraq, the public is strongly anti-war, it’s kind of pointless for us…
Bush: I don’t care. Coalition of the Willing. You’re coming.
Koizumi: Ok. I’m sorry for my insolence. The troops are on their way.
Bush: Oh yeah. Gaijin Smash.

For the record, the first ever Gaijin Smash recorded in history was performed by Commodore Matthew Perry in 1853. Japan closed borders and was very isolationist. Then one day, Perry rolled up demanding Japan open its borders for foreign commerce.

Perry: Hey! Open up Japan!
The Japanese: That’s an interesting idea. Here’s another one. How about we shuffle our feet until you get frustrated and leave?
Perry: A’ight. I’ll be back.

7 months later, Perry returned with nine, count ’em, nine gunships.

Perry: Hey Japan! Open up. Or I’ll blast you clear into China.
The Japanese: Aaahhhh! Mr. Perry-san, welcome to Japan! Please do come in!
Perry: Gaijin Smash.

Lest I forget, I should explain that as guests in a foreign country, we’re supposed to learn and assimilate some of our host’s culture and tradition. So if you are ever in a position to perform some of these attacks, you should first strike a series of stylish and overblown poses, while screaming out the attack name with all your might. Anything less is just dishonorable.
Before you actually do that though, you should smirk and explain exactly how your attack works and what you did to get it. For example, for Gaijin Smash, one might say (I still love “one might say”), “Haha, I have already won this fight. I shall now show you the awesome power of my Gaijin Smash. I acquired this attack when I was born with a bigger body than you. Over the years, I developed it by keeping up a steady diet of McDonalds, and parking in the closest spaces to wherever I went. It is the perfect attack.”
Although the explanation speech works best if one of your friends who is watching gives it for you (while you maintain your smirk). In the absence of friends or onlookers you can say it yourself.
Gaijin Perimeter – This is the gaijin’s natural ability to just repel people.
Down here in Kansai, getting on a train is not as simple as you’d think. You’re standing by yourself on the platform out in the middle of Ka-bum-fuck, Japan, waiting for the train. When it finally rolls up, you turn and find yourself absolutely surrounded by old women and businessmen. I swear, they just teleport in out of nowhere (at least they don’t yell “Breasts!” at me, though). The doors open, and it’s literally every man, woman, and child for themselves in a battle to get a seat. They’ll viciously push and bump you out of the way; they just don’t care.
Now, keeping this in mind, there are times when a gaijin is riding on the train, and yet no one, no one will sit next to him. There’s plenty of space, we don’t stink… but they just won’t do it. So basically, Japanese people will elbow each other in the face to get a seat, but they won’t sit next to us. Nice! It’s easy to become discouraged by this, but we just have to remember that we are naturally spreading our Gaijin Perimeter.
It can be useful, though. Imagine you are walking down the street one day and see an old lady faint from heat exhaustion. A crowd of onlookers begins to gather around her. That’s no good, but don’t panic! Just jump in and spread your Gaijin Perimeter, give her the space she needs until paramedics arrive on the scene. A tense situation averted!
Gaijin Telepathy – Our co-workers and supervisors don’t tell us anything. Literally. One day, I came into work at the ghetto school and found a straw hat and pair of garden gloves on my desk. OK. I sat in the teachers’ room kind of waiting for an explanation, but one never came. Eventually I noticed it had become really quiet. I then noticed that I was the only one around. Odd. I went outside to find the whole school, teachers and students, picking weeds in the soccer and baseball fields. Ah, so that’s what the garden hat and gloves were for! However, no one ever actually told me this.
I can only assume that they expected me to somehow divine the meaning of the hat and gloves with my Gaijin Telepathy. This kind of thing happens all the time, and sometimes with really important stuff (“Hey, why didn’t you come to my class today? What? No one told you?”). I think the Japanese must have watched the movie X-Men/X2, and thought, “Wow! Captain Picard is a telepath! All Gaijin must be telepaths!” Maybe they also expect me to control the weather too, which would explain why they’re always saying, “samui ne?” [it’s cold, huh?] in the winter and “atsui ne?” [it’s hot, huh?] in the summer. I guess I’m supposed to fly up, tilt my head, and say something like, “Gods of the weather skies! Expel this cold front and give us good weather for golfing!” I will draw the line, however, if they ask me to use my adamantium claws to slice their sushi.
Gaijin Power – I was in a local bar with two male friends, American and Japanese. This bar is kind of known as a pick-up bar, especially for Japanese women and foreign men. Anyway, our Japanese friend spotted a cute girl. We told him to go talk to her, but he refused, saying it was pointless because he’d only fail. We tried to tell him he wouldn’t know until he actually tried, but no go. “You guys don’t understand,” he said, “You have Gaijin Power so you have no problems getting girls.”
Gaijin Power? The hell is that? This wasn’t the first time I’d heard this from Japanese men, so my friend and I tried to find out more about this “Gaijin Power.” We both set out and, working as a Dynamic Duo (Holy Japanese sluts, Batman!), we found pairs of girls and tried to talk to them. We were pretty unsuccessful, which leads me to believe our Japanese friend was full of shit. Or maybe we just suck.
Gaijin Optic Blast – This is usually more of a counter-attack. We foreigners get stared at. A lot. Gaijin Optic Blast is the wonderful technique of staring back. It’s so easy, yet so effective! As soon as they realize we’re staring back, they look away. It’s like a projectile version of the Gaijin Smash. The only thing is, you have to keep up the Gaijin Optic Blast, because as soon as they think you are looking away, they resume staring. Do it right though, and once is a charm.
On bad days, I’ll spread my Gaijin Perimeter, and combo a Gaijin Optic Blast into a Gaijin Smash for 70% damage. And when I have meter… watch out, cause then I can cancel into Super Gaijin Smash, and there’s just no coming back from that.

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62 Responses

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  1. Xiam said, on June 26, 2006 at 2:29 am

    Haha, the Gaijin Smash! I loved this. I could so see this happening.

  2. grayp said, on June 26, 2006 at 3:41 am

    You are correct about all that you say. I live in the Kanagawa prefecture and its all true with the “gaijin smash” through the train stations or the “gaijin optic stare” or when they wont sit next to me on the train, Thats why I only sit next to hot girls. However, with the “gaijin power” I think its mixed cause I have realized around the Tokyo area japanese girls like only white guys or only black guys, Its never both. It kind of makes me mad when I go to hip hop clubs, but I live with it and sometimes the JN’s that do like black guys bring there gullable white loving friends. And speaking a little japanese does help.

  3. Rachel said, on June 26, 2006 at 4:24 am

    I used Gaijin Optic Blast on a ummmm “special” girl–ok ok, she wasn’t all there mentally–it worked, of course. She stopped staring at me and went to stare at some poor young salaryman. He saw me use the Gaijin Optic Blast successfully, so thought he’d try it. He did. And the girl BARKED at him. BARKED. Still makes me laugh.
    Great writing!! =)

  4. Amanda Gillies said, on June 26, 2006 at 9:25 am

    Hey, I use these every day and didn’t even know they were super powers. How cool do I feel now? Cheers, Az, you made my day.

  5. krystal said, on June 26, 2006 at 11:56 am

    haha! This makes me wanna go to Japan more badly. I reaaally want to try this out for myself.

  6. Rob said, on June 26, 2006 at 12:47 pm

    This post was the best yet but I can’t help but suggest that they are afraid of you bc you are black. I have a Japanese friend who is a tripple black belt and when we got a flat tire in the bronx, he refused to come out of the car and help me replace the tire (such a pussy).

  7. Dave said, on June 26, 2006 at 1:18 pm

    Very amusing. Cynical and satirical, but nonetheless very amusing.

  8. alan said, on June 26, 2006 at 3:17 pm

    ive spent time in misawa and tokyo, and everything this guy says is true.

  9. Rio said, on June 26, 2006 at 6:15 pm

    This is HILARIOUS stuff. Lovin’ it!

  10. Anonymous said, on June 26, 2006 at 6:38 pm

    oh yes, gainjin smash! love that move!
    unfortunately, It’s not only in japan that you can get superpowers for being from other place…
    Brazil is hell. Specially if you are whiter than an egg.

  11. Anonymous said, on June 26, 2006 at 6:38 pm

    oh yes, gainjin smash! love that move!
    unfortunately, It’s not only in japan that you can get superpowers for being from other place…
    Brazil is hell. Specially if you are whiter than an egg.

  12. Martin said, on June 26, 2006 at 6:45 pm

    Definetly the best story yet. I’ll be revisiting this site forever.

  13. Anonymous said, on June 26, 2006 at 7:24 pm

    As an Asian-American, I had wondered if I would be granted Gaijin Smash powers in Japan. Last summer, I was able to test this.
    Unfortunately, it seems that even Asian people can’t seem to tell one flavor of Asian from another. I was repeatedly confused for an actual Japanese, which made me understand two very important things:
    1. In Japan, an Asian gaijin does not have Gaijin Smash powers.
    2. In Japan, an Asian gaijin does have Ninja Gaijin powers.
    This can be more fun than Gaijin Smash in some ways. A Japanese person will feel completely comfortable with a Ninja Gaijin as much as he would feel with a Japanese person. Suddenly, the Ninja Gaijin attacks! My favorite technique is the Fluent English Barrage.
    “I’m quite sorry, sir, but I do not understand nor speak Japanese in the slightest. Please forgive me.”
    Their looks of shock are priceless.
    Some Ninja Gaijin have perfected the Bilingual Combo Attack, switching from English to Japanese back and forth until the unfortunate victim commits suicide from the linguistic chaos.

  14. Anonymous said, on June 26, 2006 at 7:24 pm

    As an Asian-American, I had wondered if I would be granted Gaijin Smash powers in Japan. Last summer, I was able to test this.
    Unfortunately, it seems that even Asian people can’t seem to tell one flavor of Asian from another. I was repeatedly confused for an actual Japanese, which made me understand two very important things:
    1. In Japan, an Asian gaijin does not have Gaijin Smash powers.
    2. In Japan, an Asian gaijin does have Ninja Gaijin powers.
    This can be more fun than Gaijin Smash in some ways. A Japanese person will feel completely comfortable with a Ninja Gaijin as much as he would feel with a Japanese person. Suddenly, the Ninja Gaijin attacks! My favorite technique is the Fluent English Barrage.
    “I’m quite sorry, sir, but I do not understand nor speak Japanese in the slightest. Please forgive me.”
    Their looks of shock are priceless.
    Some Ninja Gaijin have perfected the Bilingual Combo Attack, switching from English to Japanese back and forth until the unfortunate victim commits suicide from the linguistic chaos.

  15. Tim said, on June 26, 2006 at 10:39 pm

    Haha! So true! I live in Taiwan and the Optical Blast works every time. Not to mention using Wei Guo Ren Smash (that being the Chinese equivilent of Gaijin) to skip paying for the bus. One power you forgot to mention is the “Confused look followed by the ‘I don’t understand’ in shaky Japanese” works most times.

  16. Citizen said, on June 27, 2006 at 12:04 am

    Use your Gaijin “Optical Perimeter Smash” Power to create a rift in the fabric of space to achieve 1mil point get.

  17. Shinkada said, on June 27, 2006 at 1:50 am

    Best entry yet.
    … So, what’s the SUPER Gaijin Smash? Does it initiate some long, drawn-out cutscene complete with sakura petals and flying turtles? That’d be awesome.

  18. Brandon said, on June 27, 2006 at 12:08 pm

    I’m so glad I finally found out what Gaijin Smash means. Great post.

  19. Tom Landry said, on June 27, 2006 at 7:58 pm

    Well, these Gaijin Super Powers are no myth and all foreigners seem to have them. I was in Japan a couple months ago and was able to put these to the test, reading about them a while back on the original site helped me through the learning curve. The Gaijin Power even worked for me… maybe your friend was in Super Suck Mode Delta and as we all know, that is a combo attack that uses others against their will.
    Well, at the airport I think since I was going to Guam and this is a Vacation Spot, the Gaijin Perimeter failed me. I almost had an old Japanese guy sit in my lap. He actually sat in the crack between the seats. I eventually got up though and allowed him to sit in the crack with an empty seat next to him.
    I was however disappointed to not be able to find a single arcade game in the entire airport.

  20. Captain Obvious said, on June 28, 2006 at 2:06 am

    No. Super Gaijin Smash must definitely be when the Gaijin grabs the poor japanese sod by his collar, delivers an insane number of verbal assualts while juggling him in mid air in an infinity combo for 100% damage. No turning back indeed if you can pull it off.

  21. Dave said, on June 28, 2006 at 6:36 am

    Similar, but instead of sakura it’s McDonalds burger wrappers and instead of turtles it’s haggis

  22. Henry Lan said, on June 28, 2006 at 9:35 am

    Awesome gaijin powers, very enjoyable

  23. Justin said, on June 28, 2006 at 10:25 am

    Excellent. Have you ever gotten the chance to try Gaijin Optic Blast or a Gaijin Perimeter on one of those train perverts? I’m not saying they’d be feelin’ you up, but you could potentially save a damsel in distress, eh?

  24. Nick said, on June 28, 2006 at 2:27 pm

    oh, man… your site’s saved me from so many boring days at work… totally awesome posts.

  25. Asha said, on June 28, 2006 at 4:30 pm

    im japanese, and when i was in yokosuka, i noticed the gaijin smash especially on the trains. i love how they sport “baka gaijin” as something to be proud of, and use it to their advantage.

  26. Anonymous said, on June 28, 2006 at 4:57 pm

    I just stumbled upon your site and it’s great! I only wish I could see more of the archives; I hope they’re coming back or will be linked back soon.

  27. Anonymous said, on June 28, 2006 at 4:57 pm

    I just stumbled upon your site and it’s great! I only wish I could see more of the archives; I hope they’re coming back or will be linked back soon.

  28. Sarah said, on June 29, 2006 at 2:01 am

    Haha! Funny, but not. It’s like, when people here, in America, bitch about people speaking Spanish or the like… I did laugh, though. I’ll admit…I did some of that, too. Used my American-ness to get out of things…But I felt guilty afterwords. Like everytime I was in a train station, I would always find the one spot you’re NOT supposed to smoke in and light up. Damn it. Anyway, your site is really funny.

  29. Matthew said, on June 29, 2006 at 3:09 am

    This sounds like it would make an excellent street fighter character. Ryu might have hadoken but it’s got nothing on the Gaijin Optic Blast.

  30. Ryusuken said, on June 29, 2006 at 9:50 am

    I’ve found your posts in mid February, when I was on Japan, in a scholarship, and LMAO while reding it! You should saw the faces of some of the other guys and girls at the Japan Foundation on Kansai Institute while I was there…and its all too true. I am Brazilian, and a black guy to bust, and they look in a strange (“You’re big!”) way to us. Great posts, very funny, and disturbingly real…

  31. johnny said, on June 29, 2006 at 2:04 pm

    haha, nice post ^^. since i intend to go to japan for work i need to know whether this does work for europeans too?

  32. x2thecat said, on June 29, 2006 at 10:07 pm

    So who do you get as a striker? Snuzzlebunnies, with her Paralyzing Hug? Or Ultimate Sweetness and her Fatal Cuteness Overload?

  33. Jameson Mott said, on June 30, 2006 at 10:05 pm

    The Gaijin Smash power is really true. I was in Japan from America on a trip with several of my friends from high school when one of my friend’s inebriation caused the Kyoto Police Department to be alerted to our activities while in a Kyoto hotel in early June. Our “Supervisor” told the nice men with guns that she would send us to our rooms and notify our parents. We weren’t. They haven’t been. If you’ve heard anything about the balcony climbing in Kyoto around this time, that would be him.

  34. a! said, on July 2, 2006 at 8:02 pm

    Super Gaijin Immolation! There will be no approach!

  35. Derek said, on July 9, 2006 at 9:24 pm

    Haha, nice! A lot of this is immediately transferrable to China as well XD
    It amazes/ed me how people there really do act like that…

  36. Raijinz said, on July 11, 2006 at 10:00 am

    I’ve ALWAYS wanted to go to Japan, and after reading this, I’ve got even more incentive!
    SUPA GAIJIN SMASH X50!

  37. goddard said, on July 12, 2006 at 5:38 am

    I would second Derek’s comment: I get the stares constantly here in mainland China(Jiujiang). People stare on the bus, walking down the sidewalk, you even get the occasional small child pointing and laughting at you! (look mommy a a outsider!) The best story I can share about my experience the “stare” came while out one night drinking pijiu and watched the WC. At one point our host looks us and says “You are very popular, look!” We turn around as see that a crowd of 15 plus had gather in the street behind, watching our every move. It was very surreal…
    I have also been exterting my “Gainjin Smash”, altoght we had failed to give it a name.
    Ex: Stores here require one to check bags into lockers before shopping (There are numerous airport lockers made available.) From day one we have to decided to say screw that hassle we purposely cuirse right by the securty guard, flexing our gaijin smash over the hapless security guard, taunting him and his quasi position of power.
    Your story has inspried me to further explore the extent my gaijin smash powers!
    Thanks!

  38. Silvertail said, on July 17, 2006 at 4:58 pm

    Indeed, this definately works in China also. When I was studying there I noticed I had one additional power that was not mentioned. A distress signal. If ever I needed help or directions, I could stand still, focus my power, put on my best confused face, and within seconds someone would ask if I needed help in good English.

  39. Tornado said, on July 18, 2006 at 10:59 pm

    I wish i had known of the Gaijin Smash concept when I lived in Japan. I’m a western female and we don’t possess gaijin power at all.
    I was working in tokyo in the finance industry, and had a lot of issues with Japanese culture. What pissed me off the most was the way japanese men will walk 4 abreast down the street and not move for women (or anyone, really). This meant I would have to jump in the street (even if traffic was moving) to make room for them. They see you coming, they look at you, they don’t move, and on the rare occasion you keep going and bump into them the reaction ranges from an exasparated sigh to flat out confrontational “gaijin blah blah blah!!!!”
    On particularly bad days at work, I would take my frustrations out on those sidewalk-clogging bastards. I would throw my elbows up and walk/jog down the street fast enough that if someone didn’t move, they were getting knocked the fuck down. i called it Japanese bowling.
    Once in awhile, it made me powerful.

  40. Drag said, on July 19, 2006 at 3:19 pm

    Damn, if it only worked for asian gaijins.. Very good reads, been reading ya for over 2 years now.

  41. Breanna said, on July 21, 2006 at 1:27 am

    Lol… I wonder if Gaijin Power works for girls to japanese guys 😛

  42. clark said, on July 29, 2006 at 11:53 am

    Haha, so true. I live in taipei and was standing at the bus stop, eagerly awaiting the 235 missle (if you don’t wave these people down with a stadium-sized foam hand they’ll cruise right past you) and suddenly a random scooter-junkie asks me if I have problems. “Problems?’ I ask. ‘Um, I don’t think so. Just waiting for the bus!’ she says ‘oh, great!” and scoots off eagerly.

  43. Romanticide said, on August 6, 2006 at 3:59 pm

    I wonder if gaijin smash works for us mexican girls… oh wait it does. We have amazing boobage/waists powers compared to japanese girls. Also ganguros must hate us because we have super-tan-attack and we look great when they just look as inverted pandas. =)

  44. Dave said, on August 16, 2006 at 11:26 pm

    I know I’m joining in late but I had to get in on this. Beware going to Korea because the Gaijin perimeter is reversed on trains there. I am a pretty big guy and had a shaved head and big goatee so I got a wide berth most places but Koreans would walk into an empty train car and sit right next to me. Eerie.

  45. Dyobolikal said, on August 19, 2006 at 10:30 pm

    This dude stole your stuff.
    http://www.joshuazimmerman.com/japan/guides/smash.html

  46. Genghis Juan said, on August 30, 2006 at 2:42 am

    Unfortunately, this doesn’t really work in Mongolia. Here the guys will just kick your ass up and down the street if you try to use foreigner powers on them 😦

  47. Some Guy said, on August 31, 2006 at 3:42 am

    To a lesser degree Gaijin Smash/perimeter even works in Sydney Australia. Since we here in Australia are soooo multiculutural japs have taken over Sydney (our would-be capital) and have turned it into there own peice of Asia. Ive found that just using my superior size and glare i cut a way through a crowd of asians in busy places, and by using my negative chakra (looking mean) eveyone jumps out of my way.

  48. kens said, on September 25, 2006 at 5:49 pm

    rofl, this really brighten up my day, your writings are awesome!

  49. Whanhee said, on September 25, 2006 at 7:37 pm

    yeah. don’t go to korea. it will NOT work there. people will sit next to anybody to the point of leaning over and trying to read your book.
    maybe i can use the gaijin smash to haggle. 😀

  50. ED said, on September 26, 2006 at 2:04 am

    Someone should make a MMORPG based on these principles.

  51. jukkou said, on October 23, 2006 at 3:26 pm

    Frankly, while i have found insight,amusement and edification in many of your postings i found this to be most offensive. Boorish behavior only begets more boorish behavior and obviates insensitivity and a lack of compassion and respect. Think George Bush has a monopoly on alienating the entire world?

  52. Julie said, on November 2, 2006 at 11:54 pm

    I’m an exchange student in the Kochi-ken of Japan. For the first month I tried so hard to make sense of the cultural differences. Questioning why I was getting away with everything, why no one would sit with me, and why the hell is everyone staring at me? But you just summed it up easily. Great post, so acurate!

  53. h8GWB said, on November 14, 2006 at 1:46 am

    Dammit, I’m Chinese-American, and I don’t think I’ll be able to harness this power if I ever go to Japan, unless I make it totally obvious that I’m American. I’ll need to buy my super-costumes from Abercrombie.
    I’m totally fucked when I go to China, though.

  54. Cillranchello said, on January 24, 2007 at 8:27 am

    I’ll take your Super Gaijin Smash and raise you Nova: Gaijin Perimiter to Gaijin Smash for Skillchain: Gaijin Eruption with Gaijin Optical Blast Magic bursts.
    This is what happens when you play Final Fantasy XI for too long.
    Long time fan of the Editorials, glad that you’re back home, but sorry you’re out of Nihonkoku now.
    Gaijin Unite!

  55. Anonymous said, on March 31, 2007 at 2:22 am

    Well, it’s March 31st, the aniversary of the first ever Gaijin Smash. Just popping in to say that you’re awesome, so keep on postin’.

  56. Anonymous said, on March 31, 2007 at 2:22 am

    Well, it’s March 31st, the aniversary of the first ever Gaijin Smash. Just popping in to say that you’re awesome, so keep on postin’.

  57. Uehara-san said, on June 21, 2007 at 8:15 pm

    I’m living in Northern Ireland right now. It’s funny, but here I have niihon-jin super powers as well 🙂
    It’s a bit sad thought…

  58. Anonymous said, on August 19, 2007 at 12:28 am

    dude…that was hilarious…i’m just waiting for you to snap one day and SHORIYUKEN someone!

  59. Anonymous said, on August 19, 2007 at 12:28 am

    dude…that was hilarious…i’m just waiting for you to snap one day and SHORIYUKEN someone!

  60. reza said, on August 25, 2007 at 6:47 pm

    omg you’re a genius, i live in a little town in australia and the gaijin powers work!
    i always hate when people stare at me on the bus or anywhere else (they stare everywhere) but now i use the gaijin optic blast and i am the one staring them down!

  61. suspek said, on August 27, 2007 at 1:04 pm

    I live in Kansai as well and what Az wrote is what it is. I can agree that the behavior may be boorish and brute and making light of it and influencing others to replicate it may seem offensive, but living in Japan, in the thick of staring, apprehension, standoffishness, under-the-breath or obscenely blatant xenophobic comments and actions, you can do one of two things: beaten down by it OR poke fun at the system and Gaijin MF Smash some shit. Which one you got? Cause the second is much less insane than the first.

  62. Kay_Dee said, on September 8, 2007 at 6:42 pm

    So I read this particular article awhile ago (on Outpost 9 and again when you posted it here) and my US history teacher asked yesterday what Perry did and the best anyone else could come up with was “It’s something with Japan…” and I was like, “I’ve read this on the internet!” I was the only one who knew, and I learned it from you. You’re pretty freakin’ awesome.


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